Cubert's Rants

Why Must I Be a Crustacean In Love?

Robo-Rooter: Wouldn't it be rather unsafe to cure your infected bowel with a toilet-cleaning robot?

Solution by Kyle Williams: The lines says impacted bowel or bowel obstruction. One method of treatment is manually having the obstruction removed.

Microwave-Dog: Wouldn't the electronics in a self-microwaving dog ruin the taste? Also, why would it be approved for sale if it lets off such incredible amounts of radiation?

Solution by Charlie Folkdance: There is probably machinery made from food and/or microscopic wires, possibly even containing and edible compartment with radiation inside which the candied button attached to a sugar spear pokes a hole in, thus causing it's release and cooking the creme dog.

Sexist!: While the girls laugh at Fry because of his size being from before genetic engineering, why doesn't Leela or Amy seem terribly... improved...?

Solution by Charlie Folkdance: Fry likely has what would be considered small "equipment" even in todays world, while Leela and Amy have what would be considered as least moderately large in todays world.

Is There a Doctor in the Gym!?: Sudden shock cannot cause a pregnant woman to suddenly go into labour, not to mention to instantaneously give birth!

Solution by Charlie Folkdance: As mentioned earlier in the episode, genetic engineering takes place, and as mentioned in every sci-fi (which this show is) if you screw with something too long it can have undesired effects on the characters.

English Please: Why does everyone at Decapod 10 speak English? Shouldn't they speak their own language, at least to each other?

Solution by Charlie Folkdance: A good explanation of this would be that when Earth was first united it was under a ruler with absolute control who, like Napoleon or Hitler, went constantly to war. They took overDecapod 10 and maybe a few other planets sucessfully and other countries joined as 'allies' or a 'coalition' to defeat this ruler. The war laster hundreds of year and the people on the few planets they did have control of (the war taking place on Earth, possibly explaining the other invation from the pilot) learned Earthly ways. The people continued to teach squiddish to their children alongside English as a cultural thing, explaining it's rare use. When the war was over this continued, leading to the world of tomorrow's Decapod 10.

Runway?: Why is there a runway at the spaceport? In all the other episodes, the ship simply lands vertically.

Solution by Charlie Folkdance: Possibly a cultural or ceremonial use.

I'm Famous!: Why does the person at the spaceport know Zoidberg's name?

Solution by Charlie Folkdance: Zoidberg's town may be more close-knit that the one you live in.

Now Who's the Tough Guy!?: Why would Vinny, presumably a bully while Zoidberg was a larvae, still be so small while Zoidberg is fully grown? Also, why does Zoidberg eat him? Isn't that cannibalism!?

Solution by Charlie Folkdance: Maybe Zoindberg's species grows up at dirrefent rates for each person/lobster/whatever. When Zoindberg eats him it's cannibilism, which many animals and even some humans have been known to practice.

What's the Deal?: Why do female lobsters (or whatever) have breasts, when they would never breast-feed their young. After all, they die instantly after mating!

Solution by Charlie Folkdance: Possibly for the same reason human males have nipples.

Solution by Kyle Williams: To make them look better.

Wouldn't She Notice?: Why doesn't Edna ever notice when Zoidberg is talking to Fry?

How Rude!: Why does Zoidberg simply walk into Edna's home? Shouldn't he wait until someone responds to the door?

Solution by Charlie Folkdance: Zoidberg is too cool to care what you think.

Brushed Your Teeth?: Why would Edna have brushed her teeth in the morning? Zoidberg's people don't seem to have any teeth!

Solution by Charlie Folkdance: Zoidberg's species probably has teeth which just aren't noticable due to their mouth flaps.

Solution by Jodes: No, decapodians don't have teeth where humans have teeth but Zoidberg has hundreds or random organs, who knows whether or not they have teeth somewhere else? New!

It Was Rigged!: Why would Bender want Fry to throw the match, when earlier he was taking bets from others that Zoidberg would win? If Fry lost, Bender would also lose a fortune!

My Arm!: Why does the loss of an arm seem to have so little effect on Fry?

Solution by Charlie Folkdance: Because Fry is stupid and angry at the time due to Zoidberg's clear contenpt towards him after his generosity.

To Be Continued: How did Zoidberg get rid of his male jelly? He'd have to somehow, or he'd go crazy again, yet if he did, he should have died!

Solution by Charlie Folkdance: He only goes crazy at the time his species is supposed to mate and only then can he rid himself of it.

Solution by Jodes: Fry lent him his hand. New!

Don't Correct Him!: When Fry was having his arm reattached, why didn't he tell Zoidberg that it was connected incorrectly? Also, the arm didn't have a joint on it (as it was cut off below the shoulder), so how did it connect to Fry's chest?