Cubert's Rants

I Second That Emotion

Human Rinds?: If murder is illegal, as it surely is, where does the meat for Glagnar's human rinds come from?

Solution by mtvcdm - Suicide's illegal too (I kid you not- how are they gonna punish you? Death?), and yet I see suicide booths all over the place.

Plasma's Rebuttal - I don't know where you live, but suicide isn't illegal (largely for the reason you gave), though assisted suicide is for now.

Solution by krytensrevenge - Hey, all those people who use the suicide booths have to go somewhere.

Murderer!: Why does the can opener automatically grab Bender and then suddenly start? Leela had to pull the handle earlier!

Solution by Bosda: Didja ever hear of a magnet? New!

Suppository?: While an intentional joke, how is the owner meant to give a suppository to a dog with two heads and no rears?

Solution by mtvcdm - Rover got the pill, Pepper the suppository, so maybe shove both down Rover's throat.

Solution by Bosda: VEEERRRRY CAREFULLY! He bites! At best. New!

Unsafe Working Practices: Why does the vet leave a jaguar uncaged in his animal hospital?

Solution by Bosda: You want him in the cage, you put him in the cage. New!

Bite Me!: Why is one of the vet's teeth a perfect match for Nibbler? They'd be nothing like each other!

Solution by Trevin Bernhard: It was a perfect match because it fit in Nibblers gum. You also notice that he uses a laser to make it stay. He also used the laser to cut and shape it into the right tooth for Nibbler. New!

Magic Cake!: Why is it that Bender's chest now contains an oven? It seems to contain different things every time you see it!

Solution by Bosda: His model robot has interchangable parts & refit kits. Every time Bender sees a new refit kit, he steals it. Then gets Amy to install it, and trashes the old one. New!

Super Toilet!: How does Nibbler fit down the S-Bend of the toilet? Not to mention, how does Bender's body fit down it later on?

Comment by mtvcdm - Notice EVERYTHING went down toilets, just about. Toilets are dangerous. Congress needs to look into this pronto.

Solution by Bosda: In the 31st Century, s-bends are no longer used. Instead, a new technology, imported from Omicron Persii 8 is used. New!

Precision Electronics: How does the exposed empathy chip take a hammer hit from the Professor? Wouldn't it break it?

Solution by Bosda: Hubert Farnsworth lacks the vigor neccessary to break wind, much less microchips. Next question. New!

Tall Tales: In the photo of Leela and Nibbler, how does Nibbler get high enough to have his head through the head-hole?

Solution by Seymour_My_Hero: Ever heard of little thing called a ladder/stepping stool?

Good Navigating!: How could the only way out of the sewer be through a tiny pipe nobody could fit through? What about all the other sewer manholes, or simply the way they came?

Solution by Bosda: Fry has no idea whatsoever how to read a map. I'm surprised they didn't all wind up in the grease trap of a fried chicken stand. New!

Giant Toilets!: How did things like nuclear bombs or aquariums get flushed down toilets?

Solution by Bosda: They didn't. They were uncovered by mutants digging around, or during subway excavation. Or yard sales. Mutants always get the best buys at yard sales. New!

Zapp's Webpage?: How did the mutants get internet access to see Zapp's webpage? Did someone flush a working computer? Who is their ISP?

Solution by Bosda: Think about all those old AOL giveaway discs that got thrown out. Now you've got it. New!

Chicken!: Why is Nibbler afraid of El Chupanibre? He could simply eat him, like all the giant killer animals from his home planet!

Solution by Seymour_My_Hero: Nibbler saw the creatures of his home planet on a daily basis, no need to be afraid! But, something like El Chupanibre, you don't see that wandering the streets of NNY every day, now do you?

Solution by Bosda: Would you eat something you just got out of a sewer? New!

Shrinking Monster!: Over the time he is around, El Chupanibre seems to shrink for no apparent reason!

Solution by Bosda: Just a trick of the light. Monsters always look bigger, looming out of the shadows. New!