"According to his resume" said Farnsworth, "Gordon Freeman is a graduate of MIT and worked at Black Mesa."
"Why not tell us about it Freeman?" asked Fry.
Gordon Freeman doesn't reply.
"He's a man of no words" said Farnsworth.
He stood. "Alright, now that we've met our new co-worker and team member, I must escort Gordon to his post, my laboratory. Come along now Mr. Freeman.
Inside his lab, Farnsworth shows Freeman around.
"That there is my Smell-O-Scope. And this here is my newest discovery!"
He show Gordon a steel container with a removeable lid. Inside, a clear liquid is seen.
"I must remember to keep the lid on at all times to protect it from the rays of our sun" said Farnsworth as he closed the lid. "While Substance F is a remarkable discovery, I witnessed it giving off tremendous amounts of radioactive energy while it was bathed in the sunlight. Fortunately, I was able to move it out of the light before any harm was done."
"So this is Substance F" Gordon Freeman thought to himself. "My employer will be very interested in this."
"Substance F is the ultimate form of plant food" said Farnsworth. "A tiny droplet on a houseplant transformed my lab into a lush garden. It took me two days to clear it up."
He leads Gordon to his computer and brings up a file named "SubF".
"This file contains the secret formula for Substance F" said Farnsworth. "That way, I can make more if I ever run out, or if I plan to put this on the market, which I plan to. I'll win the Nobel Prize for sure. In fact, this invention of mine is so valuable, I've even taken out insurance upon it!"
Gordon listens to every word of the professor.
"Professor!" said Leela as she entered the laboratory. "We've got a bit of a problem."
"Make it quick, I'm on a tight schedule" said Farnsworth.
"We're about to make a delivery to the Nimbus, but Bender had a little too much to drink, so he'll be unable to come on board."
"That's not a problem" said Farnsworth. "Take Gordon with you."
"Why that's a great idea professor!" said Leela. "Come on Gordon, let's go!"
On board the Nimbus, Leela, Fry, and Gordon step off the ship. Fry is carrying the parcel.
"Leela! You've come back to me!" said a familiar voice.
"You again Zapp?" asked Leela. "When will you learn? I don't belong to you!"
She whispered to Fry, "remind me to get a restraining order against him."
"Will do" said Fry.
Zapp opened his mouth to speak again, but was interupted when he saw Gordon.
"Who is he?" he asked.
"He's our new co-worker" said Fry. "His name is Gordon Freeman."
"Now look here Gordon" said Zapp, "I don't care if you and Leela now work together, you can't have her!"
Gordon stares at Zapp, as usual, not saying a word.
"What's wrong?" asked Zapp. "Cat got your tongue?"
Gordon Freeman rolls his eyes back in his sockets. Another comic style bubble appears over his heads with the following words.
"Should I tell him I can't talk?"
"Ok I get it" said Zapp. "You're not answering my questions because you can't talk, or you're shy, or you have some crippling social disease! Come on Gordon! Just say something, or I'll have to impersonate what I think you sound like!"
Once again, Gordon remains silent.
"Ok fine, have it your way" said Zapp.
He puts on a brown wig, a fake brown goatee, and glasses.
"Duh, my name is Gordon Freeman" he says in a goofy voice, "and I'm a big stupid crappy research assistant, with a dumb beard, and there's fecal matter in my beard, and look at me, I'm a dumb guy, with a dumb beard, and--"
But Zapp is interupted by Gordon Freeman repeatedly whacking him in the head with a crowbar.
"Aw poo!" said Leela. "And I wanted to be the one to do that!"
When Fry, Leela, and Gordon returned to Planet Express, they heard shrieks of horror.
Farnsworth runs down the corridor with the rest of the Planet Express crew.
"It's about to go critical!" he cries.
"What happened?" asked Fry.
"I made another test on Substance F on a houseplant, but when I placed the plant in the sun, it grew into a monster!"
"A monster?!" asked Fry. "This I got to see!"
Inside the laboratory, the gang peer through the window of Farnsworth's containment cell for storing his specimens.
"Look at that!" said Fry. "It looks just like Audrey!"
"Audrey?" asked Leela.
"Ever seen Little Chop Shop of Horrors?" asked Fry.
"No" said Leela.
"No" said Amy.
"No" said Farnsworth.
"No" said Zoidberg.
"No" said Hermes.
"No, and I don't care!" said Bender.
"No" says the words in a bubble over Gordon Freeman's head.
"What are we going to do?" asked Farnsworth. "We can't contain it forever!"
Gordon walks off towards the corner of the laboratory. In his absence away at the Nimbus, his employer placed something of his here.
"Hang on!" said Fry. "I think Gordon's got an idea!"
Everyone stares at Gordon as he puts on a black and grey metallic suit with an orange front.
"Welcome to the HEV Mark IV Protective System" a voice speaks, "for use in hazardous environment conditions."
Clad in his trademark HEV suit, Gordon Freeman approaches the door, points to Farnsworth, and then to the door.
"I certainly hope you know what you're doing" said Farnsworth as he unlocks the door with the secret code on the keypad.
The door opens. Gordon runs in to fight the monster. The rest of his co-workers can only watch in horror.
Gordon pulls out an MP5 and opens fire on the plant monster(which I'll call Audrey, just like Fry did).
Audrey roars in fury and lashes out at Freeman with its thorn-like tentacles, one grazing Gordon's shoulder.
"Minor lacerations detected" a voice from his suit speaks. "Automatic medical systems engaged. Morphine administered."
Gordon points his MP5 at Audrey and lets loose a grenade from the attached grenade launcher, right into Audrey's mouth.
While all this happens, the Futurama gang watch in astonishment through the windows.
As Fry watches, he sees something reflected in the window behind him that no one else sees.
In the window's reflection, Fry sees a mysterious man in a blue suit carrying a black briefcase. The stranger adjusts his tie and smoothes the wrinkles from his suit with his free hand, then walks off. Fry turns his head just in time to see the stranger vanish into thin air.
Fry shook his head with his eyes shut tight. Was it his imagination, or had he really seen someone in the lab?
Audrey roared in agony as the grenade explodes. It thrashes around, spraying green goo everywhere before finally collapsing forth.
Gordon puts away his weapon, his job completed.
As he steps outside the containment chamber, his co-workers cheer for him.
"Gordon, you were amazing!" said Leela.
"That was truely spectacular!" said Hermes.
Freeman doesn't say a word.
"Well said Gordon" said Fry.
"What did he say?" asked Leela.
"No comment" said Fry.
"Alright everyone" said Farnsworth, "back to your positions. Get back to work, there's nothing more to see. Let me clean up this mess."
As everyone else leaves the lab, Farnsworth and Freeman start to clean up Audrey's remains.
"Who could have foreseen that Substance F would be so powerful?!" said Farnsworth. "Nevertheless, this discovery will make me famous! I'll be the greatest scientist in the world!"
Little does Farnsworth know is that he is being watched. Outside the door to his laboratory, the stranger Fry had seen reflected in the glass of the window of the containment room hears everyword, then he walks off.
"We'll see about that!"
... To Be Continued