Fan Fiction

The Fry-borg, Part 4
By Luis Gonzales


Authors notes: Same as the last chapter, feedback needed and requested, big thanks to Alexei. Thanks to everyone who reads this, and thanks to Allen for pointing out some errors. Fixed some annoying errors, like Leela's name, now on with it.

Shimmering lights of  several shapes, a sense of high speed, and finally a blinding flash. A loud thud and sharp pain on the back... disorientation... and finally realization.

FRY: (Getting back up) Owch. Wow!... I'm back!

We see Fry and Leela standing on the rooftop of an unknown building. They are surrounded by the sounds and smells of New York City.

FRY: Oh man, it's great to be back!, the sights, the people (Somebody yells to him "shut up you crazy motha****a!") the smells.

LEELA: How can you miss the smell of wet trash and pee?

FRY: Actually, I got carried away, I don't.

LEELA: (Activates the wrist-comp and starts broadcasting) Nibbler, are you there?, can you hear me? Nibbler!?... it's useless, it only gets static.

FRY: Guess we're alone for the time being.

LEELA: At least until he gets in position. So Fry, you're from this time, were should we go?

FRY: I think we should go to the applied cryogenics and check the tubes.

LEELA: How? we got no ship, I don't see any transport tubes and we don't even know were we are!

FRY: I do, we're near Panuchi's. Maybe I could make a phone call and ask my folks for help. But you better do something about the eye, I don't think people will just look the other way.

LEELA: Yeah. So we better get moving.

Fry checks a small room that probably has a stairway, but it's locked. Leela just looks around and keeps trying to talk to Nibbler. Unfortunately for them, the people of that building heard the noises from the time gate and thought they were gunshots, and called the police, who were on their way.

LEELA: I keep trying to contact Nibbler but I get nothing but static... Wait... there!.

NIBBLER: (From Leela's wrist-comp) Greetings. What is your situation?.

FRY: Uh, we're on a rooftop?

LEELA: (To Fry) That's not what he-forget it! (Back to Nibbler) We are back in Fry's time and we're ok. Have you found anything we could use yet?.

NIBBLER: Yes, we got all the time in the universe as long as the strike team does not accomplish their goal. We found some weapons, but we did not found much ammunition. You will have to find that yourselves. We also found human currency from that time in great quantity, but most of it is damaged so we can not send you much of it. You will have to acquire most of what you need there.

LEELA: (Sarcastic) Oh great!, what's next, we fight an army with our bare hands just ourselves!?

FRY: (Scared) I think so!

Leela looks to Fry, about to yell at him for being dumb, when she sees what Fry meant. Six policemen armed with pistols and shotguns train their sights on them from the street. One of them grabs a speaker from a police car and yells at them "This the NYPD! throw down your weapons and stay where you are!"

FRY: (Calm) It's no big deal, when they find out we got no guns they'll let us go.

LEELA: Yeah, they'll let YOU go, right after they start dissecting me!

FRY: (frustrated) Damn! I forgot! so what do we do? we can't kill them, they are just doing their job!

LEELA: (To nibbler) Nibbler!, we're gonna get captured! send us some equipment ASAP!.

Another time gate opens beside them. When the light and ear-piercing noise fades, they see a couple of  small black backpacks filled with miscellaneous ammo, some grenades, a couple of small sub-machine guns, a shotgun, 2 pistols and 500 dollars next to them.

FRY: Cool!, just like in the action movies. We'll be all (makes gun sounds) and they'll be all (Makes pain sounds).

LEELA: Fry! This is no time to be childish!.

FRY: (Put down) Awww. (Leela picks up the shotgun) uh Leela there's something you need to know about the weapons of my time.

LEELA: (Annoyed) Don't patronize me Fry, I saved your ass when we were in the DOOP, I won't have any problems with this ancient thing. (She aims it dead ahead correctly) where's the stun button?

FRY: (Careful) Uh, they are for kill only.

LEELA: (Typical prideful Leela) I know, I was kidding. Let's see what they can do.

FRY: Leela wait!, they have-

Leela pulls the trigger and the gun fires. The kick knocks Leela to the floor.

FRY: -recoil... Leela are you okay?

LEELA: (Getting back up with a surprised look on her face) Ouch!, my chest hurts!, damn this stupid weapons!.

They split everything between them, but as Fry gets his backpack on, he accidentally drops a grenade and it rolls over the rooftop and falls in a fire escape. Fry drops the gun (the heavy one) and goes to pick it up the grenade but slips and falls into the fire escape himself. The policemen were just about to go to the ceiling and arrest Leela and Fry, but before they could, and Fry could climb back onto the roof, an apache helicopter had arrived. Leela's eye widened as she saw the helicopter started shooting, she quickly dove behind the small locked room, as the chopper's bullets took chunks off everything they hit. One of those bullets blew off the stair Fry was climbing and he fell on his back into a dumpster.

Now we join Leela. She's desperately running thru the rooftops, barely dodging the helicopter's bullets which keep coming at a ludicrous rate towards her. The helicopter finally stops firing as it moves to face Leela directly. Leela takes a deep breath, an SMG on each hand, and fires at the cockpit of the apache. Leela's shots take chunks off the glass canopy but didn't pierce it. As the helicopter is about to fire at Leela, she notices that there's a man in a red (possibly velour) uniform in the cockpit. Leela realizes there's nothing that can be used for cover... A tear forms in the corner of her eye as she prepares for death. Her whole life goes through her head (cliché or not); her days as an orphan...high school...as a fate assignment officer...when she first met Fry...planet express...Fry... "the only thing I regret leaving behind" she thought, "goodbye Fry".....


Fry, standing on a fire escape of the building, threw a grenade at the apache. The grenade exploded near it, and jammed it's chaingun. The helicopter flew away. Leela recovered from the shock, and fired at the retreating helicopter but didn't even scratch it. Leela calms down and gets out of "attack mode". Fry climbs to her side.

FRY: (At the verge of tears) Leela!, are you okay!?

LEELA: (Also at the verge of tears) Fry!... You saved me!...I thought I was gone! (She hugs Fry and starts sobbing)

FRY: (Thinking) I almost lost her. Damn! I got to be stronger, I got to be able to protect her as she's able to protect me!. (To Leela) I was so scared that I'd loose you!

Fry held Leela close, their warm bodies shaking from emotion and fear in the chilly New York air. When they were together, everything else went away, as they were, to each other, they only thing that existed. They expressed each other their love just by being together, without needing words. Their embrace seemed to go on forever, but somehow to them, forever was not enough. However a thought hit Leela that made her eye widen.

LEELA: (Breaking off) That thing could be back at any time! We got to get somewhere safe Fry!

FRY: You're right! we have to get to my parents house, since I can't think of any other person that would help me even with the cops on my back.

LEELA: But what about this (she points at her eye)?

FRY: I don't think we have many options, so just cover it the best you can until we get someplace more private. I don't think it'd be a good idea to walk so we'll use the subway, but we got to leave all this equipment hidden somewhere.

Leela and Fry get to the street via the fire escape and hide their gear near a dumpster. Leela gets an old newspaper and hides her face reading it. They both pass near a group of cops staring at the building where they were, and get into a subway station. Fry gets some loose change that was in his pants since he was frozen and pays for their tickets, and they both get on the subway. They both get a seat in front of a sleeping bum.

LEELA: This place smells like barf, the floor and back of the seats is covered by chewed gum, and I think I just saw something horrible out the window. How can people live here?

FRY: This is a subway Leela, nobody lives here.

BUM: I do!.

LEELA: That's so rude of you Fry!.

FRY: That's just a bum, a Zoidberg of my time.

LEELA: Oh. Then I'm sorry.

BUM: Awww.

A bunch of punks get in the same car they both are. They look like normal high school bullies with tattoos and knives. Being Fry, Leela and the bum the only people in the car, they pick Fry and Leela as their target. They surround them, and soon the leader of these speaks to Leela, whose eye is covered by the newspaper.

LEAD PUNK: Hey there sweetcheeks, wanna ditch the match and get some fun?

LEELA: (Calming herself) I don't think so...

LEAD PUNK: Then you both give us your money if you don't wanna get hurt!

FRY: Fat chance!

The lead punk grabs Fry by the collar and grabs a knife from his pocket. He's about to put it against Fry's throat but Fry grabs his arm (the one with the knife), and bends it towards the punk. The punk cries in pain and drops the knife.

LEAD PUNK: Don't just stand there! do something you dumb-shits!.

A punk grabs Leela's newspaper. Now everyone in the car can see that Leela has one eye. The punks are not impressed by this.

PUNK: Let his arm go or we hurt your one-eyed bitch!

FRY: You really shouldn't have done that you moron!

Fry's about to punch him when Leela kicks him in the groin. The punk collapses into the floor, grabbing his crotch. The rest of the punks back away.

LEAD PUNK: C'mon man! lemme go, I was just kidding! here, this is all my money(tosses it at Fry), just don't hurt me man!

Fry lets the punk go and Leela picks up the newspaper and covers her face again. The punks run to the last subway car and stay there.

FRY: Might as well pick up the loot.

Fry does and they both get out of the subway and out on the street. They both walk to Fry's home, the chilly autumn breeze gently passing by, picking up objects that lie on the almost deserted New York streets, they held each other closely, feeling warm against each other. Fry suddenly stops and looks Leela in the eye, her eye shines with a light so beautiful to him, that he seems forever lost in that everlasting gaze. Leela also looks at Fry's eyes, they eyes she loved so much, the eyes of the man that once seemed so stupid and childish, the same eyes that seemed vacant when he was watching tv, those same eyes had a look she never saw in a man looking at her. Their faces go closer and closer and before they knew it, their lips were locked together in a passionate kiss. After this intimate moment, they arrive at Fry's home without more mishaps, except for 1 or 2 persons that stare suspiciously at Leela. They both walk to the patio and hold hands tight, but Fry hesitates to knock on the door.

FRY: (Sad) This is the first time I see my parents in a long time, I don't know what will happen when this door opens.

LEELA: (Sympathetic) Fry, you know I just met my parents over a year ago and I love them, even though I had to grow without them. If you love them, and they are your parents, you don't need to be afraid.

FRY: But Leela, I'm not afraid or anything like that... I'm just worried that when we have to leave again, I- I'll miss them

Leela hugs Fry tight and gives him a small kiss. Fry saw the look in her eye, and that gave him the courage. He knocked on the door and stood there, waiting nervously until finally the door opened up. At this time Leela had already undone her ponytail and covered her eye with her hair.

YANCY (Fry's brother, not his dad): (Bored look on his face) We don't buy nothing-(Surprised) -Little bro! Where the hell you been!?, man dad will kick your ass!.

FRY: (glad) Yeah, good to see you too Yancy.

YANCY: Good to see you!? that's all you can say after being lost for 3 years! damn you're stupid!. (Concerned) Seriously, where've you been? the cops gave up a month after you were gone, and that psychic from the yellow pages mom called said you were with Jimmy Hoffa!

FRY: Well you wouldn't believe me if I told you.

YANCY: (Enthusiastic) Just get your ass in here, and go see mom and dad.

FRY: You still live here?

YANCY: You're kidding? you're the looser in this family. (Notices Leela and starts talking suave) Ooh, who's this cute babe? is she a friend of yours?

FRY: She's my wife you jackass.

YANCY: Yeah, right, hahahaha. Seriously, is she a friend of Michelle?

Fry panics and immediately signals Yancy to shut up, but the damage was already done and Leela, careful not to show her bare face, looks at Yancy and tries to show him her ring. But unfortunately Yancy wasn't as far as she saw him (remember Leela's depth perception?) and she accidentally hit him in the face.

YANCY: Ouch!, that was totally uncalled for!.

LEELA: (Cleverly disguises her problem) Don't mention Michelle!. And Fry's my husband.

Fry and Leela kiss.


Fry and Leela step in the house and follow Yancy to the living room where Fry's parents are. We see Fry's mom (Laura) yelling wildly at the screen from the couch, which by the way seems to be burning. And Fry's dad (Yancy sr.) sitting in a comfy chair next to her.

LAURA: (In her sports frenzy) GO! GO! GO!

YANCY SR.: (In his constant paranoia) I'm telling you! this Cuban communists are ruining America's national sport! It's all part of  Castro's plan!

YANCY JR.: Uh, mom, dad, you might wanna see who's behind me.

LAURA: WAIT UNTIL THE COMMERCIALS!.... Ok, now what were you saying (Turns to see Yancy and sees Fry and Leela behind him) Yan... Oh my god!

YANCY SR.: Oh, c'mon, that's just a trick from an ex-soviet spy to (Also turns to see Yancy) infiltrate... You irresponsible bum!, where were you all these years! you had your mother really worried (But just then the commercial break ends and Fry's mother couldn't care less about him, he gets up from his chair and stars walking towards Fry) This time I'm really gonna kick your ass!.

Yancey sr. is about to grab Fry, but Leela steps between the two. Unfortunately, now everyone saw why Leela has bad depth perception. Fry's family is shocked.

YANCY SR.: What the hell!? where did you find her!? a freak show!? You're really getting desperate after Michelle dumped you right Yancy?.

YANCY JR.: (Stares at the floor) ...

LAURA: Oh my god! How...

FRY: (Cuts his mom short) Mom the game is on again!

LAURA: OH! (Locks her eyes on the screen again) GO! YANKEES! GO!.

Leela cries and starts to walk away, but Fry stops her.

FRY: (Sad) Leela, this is all my fault, we shouldn't have come here...(Angry) BECAUSE! THIS IS NOT MY FAMILY!

YANCY SR.: So you're not only blind but are more stupid than you already were!?






Just as they were about to fight, a familiar sound is heard. Fry and his dad are distracted by this and stand down.

LEELA: (Thinking) That sounds like a... (Out loud) DAMN! IT'S BACK!

THE FRY FAMILY: What's back!?

The apache is just hovering in front of the house, aiming it's laser guided missiles. Everybody knows this because a red beam is projected in the smoke that comes out of the old tv.


They all run towards the shelter Fry's dad had built (the one from "luck of the fryish"). As the last one of them, Yancy sr., is entering, the apache fires the missiles at the house. The whole house collapses and a fragment of metal hits Fry's dad as he stumbles into the shelter. He tumbles down the stairs and passes out when his head hits a wall. Laura immediately turns on a radio that was there and...

LAURA: (Setting the radio) Oh my god! what are we going to do! your father is...(tunes into a baseball game) ABOUT TO STEAL HOME!.

YANCY JR.: Dad will be okay. It's not like the time when he tried to fix the microwave with a hammer and a blowtorch.

FRY: (Shudders) Don't remind me, I still think I can't have any kids!.

LEELA: I don't think we are safe here. Isn't there something that can stop that thing!?

FRY: Maybe dad hid a few things behind the safe.

Fry, Leela, and Yancy grab the safe and push it out of the way. Behind the safe there's a small space that holds a big, old looking gun.

LEELA: Now this could really hurt that thing outside!.

FRY: The helicopter? just remember that these things

LEELA: (Annoyed) have recoil, I know, I know.

YANCY JR.: (Surprised and scared) Are you two crazy!? taking on a helicopter just you two! what do you think you are? superheroes!?.

FRY: (Ignores Yancy) But how will you get of here without that machine gun ripping you to shreds!?

LEELA: Hmm...

FRY: Wait. I know! I'll distract him, you kick his ass!.

LEELA: (Mad) No way! it's too risky Fry! this is no action movie and you're not Sylvester Stallone's head!.

YANCY JR.: (Confused) What's she talking about?

FRY: (To Yancy) I might as well explain it to you, but not now... (To Leela, determined) I'm risking my life for yours and you can't stop me!.

LEELA: (Desperate) Fry! the whole damn reason we're doing this is for you! you have to live!

FRY: (Dead serious) I don't want to live without you!.

Leela holds Fry tightly against her. They both look at each other and nod. Fry gets up the stairs followed close behind by Leela, carrying the old gun.

FRY: On the count of 3, I'll run out the door and distract him, then you aim and take him down. ...one...two...three!

Fry runs away from the apache screaming from the bottom of his lungs. The Helicopter fires at him, but it's way too far to hit a small moving target like Fry. Leela comes right behind him, gets prone and is about to fire at the helicopter, that at the same time is about to shoot rockets at Fry. The old gun turns out to be really powerful. Roaring wildly, it discharges the whole magazine in 3 seconds, the empty casings piling up beside Leela. The shots hit the helicopter, but unlike last time, they pierce right thru it like it was made out of cardboard. The apache's engines die and it finally falls, shot down. It crashes in front of Leela and slides towards her, stopping an inch away from her face (Think Men in black). Fry and Leela approach the burning wreck and the cockpit opens. It's one of the strike team members. He's covered in blood, dizzy and looks fairly banged up. Fry is really furious and something within him takes over. He grabs him by the throat with his right hand and lifts him into the air.


PILOT: I was just doing my job! you'd have done the same!

FRY: (Maniacally) WRONG ANSWER! (He tosses him against the debris of the house) NOW YOU SAY WHAT YOU KNOW, AND THEN YOU DIE!.

LEELA: (A little scared) Fry, I want to know some things too, but to play good cop, bad cop, you need a positive offer.

FRY: (Turns to see Leela, who notices the madness in Fry's eyes) Oh, but Leela, I'm not playing any game here, HE'S GONNA TELL ME WHAT HE KNOWS AND THEN I'LL KILL HIM!.

The pilot is starting to run but Fry catches him by the leg. He drags him back to the crashed apache and tosses him back into the cockpit.


PILOT: (Scared but hiding it) You don't scare me!.

FRY: (Punches the pilot in the jaw) I'm not trying to scare you!, I'M TRYING TO TOAST YOU!

LEELA: (Now really afraid) Fry, I think that's enough.


LEELA: Fry stop it! you're scaring me!

PILOT: (Terrified) Ok! ok! All 4 of us got here safely, but the field generated by the time gate made our equipment useless. We don't know where the primary target is, so we spread around the city looking for it, and the others are bound to find it soon. You were our secondary target if you showed up, so I just did my job and tried to eliminate you, NOW PLEASE LET ME GO!.


Fry grabs him from the shoulders and tosses him out of the cockpit. Fry walks next to him and stands right beside him, but as Fry is about to speak, the guy passed out.

FRY: (Humorous) Thanks man!.

LEELA: (Shocked) You were acting all along!?

FRY: Yeah. Who'd have guessed that all those years of watching action movies would serve for something?

LEELA: (Serious)You scared me! don't ever do that again you dumb-ass!.

FRY: (Also serious) Don't worry, I'll never do it again (he smiles at Leela, she frowns a bit but finally smiles back).

LEELA: How do you do that anyway?

FRY: I just took chunks of every action hero I saw, and used this weird feeling in my head that I get when I'm in danger. Bender taught me the rest.

They were interrupted by Fry's family, they got out of the bomb shelter and ran towards them (Yes including Yancy sr.).

YANCY JR: (Shocked) I can't believe it!, YOU SHOT DOWN A MILITARY HELICOPTER!.

LAURA: (Happy) Oh, I'm so glad you're safe, even if you are married to a manly girl with one eye (Leela just gets annoyed by this comment).

YANCY SR.: (smiling) You finally did something that I can be proud of son!

FRY: (Frowning) I already did something I'm proud of, even if you aren't (He pulls Leela close and holds her tight). The last thing I'm ever saying to you, dad, is that Leela is my wife, you like it or not, and she was the one that blew that thing off the sky. Now if you got something to say, it'd better be an apology for Leela or a goodbye!.

YANCY SR.: (In thought)...sigh. Goodbye... Phillip...

Yancy Sr. walks away from them, back to the shelter.

LEELA: (Sad) Fry, I'm so...

FRY: (Interrupts Leela) Don't say it. Never apologize for who you are. Never apologize for being the woman I fell in love with.

YANCY JR.: Well it looks like you guys are for real, so I wanna say I'm sorry for trying to hit on you, uh, Lily?

LEELA: It's Leela, Turanga Leela.

YANCY JR./LAURA: Turanga!?

Leela just looks up and sighs.

LAURA: Well, if she makes you happy, then I'm happy. Why didn't you invite us to the wedding?

FRY: (Smiles nervously) Uh, ah, that's cause... uh... Hey, isn't that tv over there working?

LAURA: Oh god, you're right. But the game is over already.

FRY: Are you sure?

Laura stands there for a second, then runs at the old smoking tv in the debris.

YANCY: You won't get rid of me that easy little man. C'mon, spit it out, where you been?, and how come your girl (to Leela), no offense (back to Fry), has one eye and purple hair?

FRY: That's because we are from the...

LEELA: (Hits Fry in the back with her elbow) -Pennsylvania state.

FRY: Hey Yancy, I gotta talk to Leela in private, could you go help mom get the tv to the shelter?

YANCY: Yeah, just don't run away, I'm faster than you!.

Yancy runs off and does has he's told.

FRY: (Whispering) Pennsylvania state? What were you thinking!?

LEELA: (Whispering) at least I was thinking Mr. "My wife's a mutant from the future"!.

FRY: (Whispering) Well what's the plan then?

LEELA: (Whispering) That's the point, I've-got-no-plan!.

FRY: (Whispering) Well I'm the dumb one! I can't have a good plan!

LEELA: (Whispering) But I always do the plans! now it's your turn!

FRY: (Whispering) Well the plan is to use Bender's advice.

LEELA: (Whispering) Cheese it?

FRY: (Whispering) Yes!.

Fry and Leela start to tip-toe away, but Yancy (Fry' brother, not his father) spotted them. He was carring the tv with Laura to the shelter, and they were just about to enter when he saw them.

YANCY JR.: (Excited) I knew it! he's going to run for it! (he let's go the tv and starts to follow them)

LAURA: What did you say Yancy? (at this time she backs into the steps). Yancy grab the tv!. Yancy!!. (She loses her balance and falls with the tv on her) OH CRAP!! (She tumbles down the stairs yelling obscenities a la Homer Simpson). YANCY!, GET THIS TV OFF ME!... YANCY!!... Oh well, at least the plug is nearby. (Turns on the tv, and it's ESPN) YEAH!, GO! METS! GO!.

We turn to see Yancy running behind Fry and Leela, they don't notice him as they walk along the street, which after they leave fills with police cars, fire engines and the such. Yancy is about to get bored and go home when he sees them enter a deserted alley, and search near a dumpster. They find what they were looking for...

YANCY: (Bored) Maybe I should just call it a day and- (Sees Leela and Fry walk out of the alley)-Oh my god!

Leela and Fry walk out of the alley with their backpacks on, each a weapon in hand, and start running to an unknown (for Yancy) destination. Yancy follows them until they force their way into a building which we all know from the beginning of the series. Yancy walks thru the broken door and hears a loud "click!", he turns to the direction the noise came from and is now staring at a gun barrel.

To be continued...

Author's end notes: Well, I finally moved my ass and checked out TFP. I was almost traumatized when I saw a bunch of material from most of the contributors in here. I really can't say anymore cause I'm out of words...and time, so I'm waiting for your opinions (FIRE AT WILL!).