Fan Fiction

Universe Jumping Bender, part 4
By Rush

Scene: Apartment 2 I & Plus 1 I: Fry's and Leela's Bedroom. The lights are out in room, in their late 20s Fry and Leela as fit as ever both naked in bed, under the blanket giggling.

Leela: (playfully) 'Fry, don't do that it tickles. [she laughs.] Oh, that's it! You gonna get it. [Leela over powers Fry in tickle frighting, making him laugh very loudly.] How do you like it?

[She continues to tickle Fry, is laugher becoming louder and louder.]

Fry: 'Ha ha , he he. Stop!

[She continues to tickle Fry, until he can barely breathe.]

Leela stops letting Fry catch a breath, then her head under the blanket presses against his head.]

Fry: (being kissed) 'Hmm? [relaxes into the kiss.] Mmmmmmm--

She continues to make-out with him until he does not return it, she stops while Fry gasps for breath.

Leela: (very softy) 'I love you.

Fry: (still gasping) 'I...I..I..I love you, too.

U-J-Bender appears in middle of them on the bed they both gasp.

Fry: 'Burglars!

[They pop their heads out of the bed both of their hair in a mess, turn on the lights, revealing a room pretty much not any difference at all from Leela's old apartment "Apartment 1 I". although the bed is a bit bigger and also the room is just a little bit bigger.]

Fry and Leela: Bender!?

[They sit up, Leela uses the blanket to cover herself.]

U-J-Bender: Jees, get a room you two!

Leela: 'We have a room! What are doing in here?

Fry: 'Yeah! How dare you interrupt my Snu-Snu!

U-J-Bender: 'Hey, I'm just a lost Universe Jumping Bender.

Fry and Leela: 'A wha?

Leela: 'A Universe Jumping Be--

Bender: (seeing wedding rings on their fingers) 'What's with the rings?.

Leela: 'We're married....well actually remarried after about a day when we had a divorce. But then I found out about...[her eye fills with tears.]...about that Fry had moved the stars themselves to write me a love note in the sky. And that was why I married him in the first place.

Fry: (crying) 'I was so lucky you seen it.

Leela: (very softy) 'Oh, Fry, [she cuddles him.] I know so was I, to find out you didn't trick me after all....[she kisses him, tears.] I mean, I could of missed out in much happiness if I didn't see it. (shouting) Bender get the Hell outta here! (Seaming) Now!

Cut to: Outside bedroom door. Three of Fry's and Leela's children all wearing pajamasm stand outside the door knocking on it. A girl; with orange long hair who looks about 4 years old that has Fry's nose and who looks just like her mother, she also holds in her arms another girl, about 2 years old who has one huge eye in the middle of her face and who's is hair is mixed between purple and orange looking like her mother. And A boy ; with two eyes purple hair and Leela's nose who looks about 3 years old, and who looks just like his father Fry.

Oldest Girl: (shouting outside bedroom) 'Mom, what's going on in there.

Boy: 'Are you two fighting? You never fight.

Leela: (softy) 'No, we're not sweeties. (Shouting) Get out, Bender!

U-J-Bender: 'Hold on!

[Leela stands up out of the bed "butt naked" and goes into a marshal art stance, from seeing this Fry's eyes widen.]

Leela: (screaming) 'Get outta here, I'll kick the brick out of you.

U-J-Bender with a flash of light disappears.

Oldest Girl: 'Is everything Ok?

Leela: 'Yes...[gets back under the blanket]...go back to sleep sweetie .

Fry: 'Well, that was weird.

Leela: 'Yeah I know. (sexfully) Now about that Snu-Snu interruption Fry. [cuddles closer to him kissing his cheek.] Let me uninterrupted for you.

Scene: Deep Space. Bender scratches something similar to the sketch on the Pioneer space probe on his door, but the man and woman have a huge Bender standing above them.

Bender: 'There! Now when I'm found in a million years people will know what the score was. [An object hits him.] Hey! what's bombarding me? [More objects hit him.] Oh, no! An asteroid field. If even a pea-sized asteroid were to whiz through my skull it could-- [One whizzes through his skull.] Ow! Hurt slightly! [More asteroids hit him and one becomes embedded in his door. He clears the asteroid field.] Well that was fun. Now for eons of loneliness.

U-J-Bender: [flying past him waving his hand] 'Hey!

Bender: [waving his hand] 'Hey!

U-J-Bender 2# : [flying past him waving his hand] 'Hey!

Bender: [waving his hand] 'Hey!

U-J-Bender 3# : [flying past him waving his hand] 'Hey!

Bender: [waving his hand] 'Hey!

U-J-Bender 4# : [flying past him waving his hand] 'Hey!

Bender: [waving his hand] Hey!

U-J-Bender 5# : [flying past him waving his hand] 'Hey!

Bender: [waving his hand] Hey!

U-J-Bender 6# : [flying past him waving his hand] 'Hey!

Bender: [waving his hand] Hey!

U-J-Bender 7# : [flying past him waving his hand] 'Hey!

Hundreds, if not thousands of Benders fly past Bender.

Sometime later: Bender is crying flying through space, he hears a beeping and looks up.

Bender: Hey! That galaxy's signalling in binary. I gotta signal back. But I only know enough binary to ask where the bathroom is. (shouting) You speak English?

God: 'I do now.

[It pulls Bender towards it.]

Bender: 'What are you? Some kind of galactic computer?

God: 'Possible. I am user friendly, my good chum.

Bender: 'Who built you?

God: 'I have always been.

Bender: 'Oh, my God. Are you God?

God: 'Possible. I do feel compassion for all living things, my good chum.

Bender: 'But why would God think in binary? Unless ... you're not God, but the remains of a computerised space probe that collided with God.

God: 'That seems probable.

Bender: 'One question where did all them me-selves come from?

God: 'The Benders who flew past you?

Bender: 'Yes.

God: 'Hmm, how to put this into words you'll understand. They were from other alternate universes, lost in jumping from universe to universe, because of Professor Hubert J. Farnsworths from different parallel universes latest inventions.

Bender: 'Uh, oh, okay.

Scene: Ruins of Old New York. Leela with the implant gun stands over Fry, who sits on a wall. The Ruins of Rockefeller Center Skating Rink can be seen in the background.

Fry: 'Look, Leela, I don't understand this world but you obviously do, so I give up. If you really think I should be a delivery boy, I'll do it. [He holds out his hand to Leela. She gets the implant gun ready. Fry cringes and looks away. The gun clicks but Fry feels nothing. He opens his eyes and sees Leela drop her own chip on the floor.] Your chip. What are you doing?

Leela: 'Quitting.

Fry: 'Why?

Leela: 'Because I've always wanted to. I just never realised it before I met you.

She puts her hand on his and smiles. Bender sees a flash of light in the distances, he walks away to investigate. Leela stares deeply into Fry's eyes and he does the same. Then Leela leans forward and kisses Fry's cheek.

Fry: 'Leela, I--

Leela: 'Don't say anything.[Pulls him into a hug]You'll spoil this moment between us.

Their lips meet and they kiss deeply. Bender given up on finding what he saw, walks back to Fry and Leela. But then he stops in his tracks his eyes zoom in.

Bender: (quietly) 'Ohh ,what's all this then? [Sees Leela peel of her coat] Whoa! They're really are getting into it. Better leave em alone, for a bit.

Sometime later: Fry and Leela are still making-out, although now Leela lies on top of Fry on the ground.

Fry: (whispering) 'I love you. So ,so much.

Leela: (whispering) 'So, so, do I.

Bender: 'Ahem![Leela breaks the kiss, stands up, getting up off Fry embarrass and dusting herself off. Fry has lipstick kiss marks all over his face, and he gasps for breath] I don't wanna spoil the sex party or anything but---

Fry: 'What is the[Leela helps him up, and puts her coat back on] matter with you?

Bender: 'Look look! We're all job deserters now. We're unemployed and we have nowhere to go.

Leela: Correction: We're unemployed but Fry has a doddering old relative to mooch off of.

She holds up the picture of Farnsworth.

Bender: 'Oh, he's really old, and ugly.

Scene: Planet Express: Farnsworth's Lounge. Professor Farnsworth is asleep in his chair. The TV is on.

Clark: [on TV] 'Hello, I'm Dick Clark's head. Welcome to a special year 3000 edition of New Year's Rockin' Eve!

The crowds around him cheer. The doorbell rings and Farnsworth wakes up.

Cut to: Outside Planet Express. Farnsworth opens the door to Fry, Bender and Leela.

Farnsworth: 'Who are you?

Fry: 'I'm your dear old Uncle Fry, and this is my girlfriend, Leela. Right?

Leela: 'Right.

Farnsworth: 'I don't have an Uncle Fry, who has an sexy girlfriend with one eye or any Uncle, at all to start with in that matter.

Bender: 'Well, you do now!

He pushes Farnsworth to hard back inside and he falls over.

Scene: Planet Express:Farnsworth's Lounge. Farnsworth and Fry are hooked up to a DNA machine. It dings and a red light flashes.

Farnsworth: 'By God, I am your nephew! This is absolutely incredible!

Bender: 'He he. Can we have some money?

Farnsworth: 'Oh, my, maybe.

Cut to: Planet Express:Farnsworth's Lab. The four walk in.

Farnsworth: 'Let me show you around. That's my lab table and this is my work-stool. And over there is my intergalactic spaceship!

He points in the general direction of a big green spaceship in a huge hangar next to the lab.

Farnsworth: 'And here's where I keep assorted lengths of wire.

Fry and Leela are to busy making-out to care.

Farnsworth: 'Oh why, do I even bother, anymore, hmm?

Smitty: (from outside on microphone) 'Attention, job deserters! Come out with your hands up. We have you partially surrounded.

Leela pulls out of the kiss with Fry, who gasps for breath

Fry: 'No!

Bender sh**s a brick.

Scene: Outside Planet Express. Smitty holds Nixon's head in a jar. The glass is cracked and taped in places.

Nixon: 'Get those bums!

Cut to: Farnsworth's Lab.

Bender: 'Well, we're boned!

Leela: 'Can't we get away in the ship?

Farnsworth: 'I suppose it is technically pos--

Fry: 'Whoa! A real live spaceship!

Farnsworth: 'Oh now you see it! You good for nothing--

Bender: 'C'mon! Lets goooooo!

Fry and Leela run towards the ship and Bender carries Farnsworth under his arm.

Cut to: Cockpit. Fry runs in and sits himself down in a seat in front of the control panel.

Fry: 'I'll get us out of here.

He presses a few buttons and pulls a lever. A little hatch opens in the control panel, a paper cup come down and the machine fills it with coffee.

Farnsworth: 'Can anyone drive stick?

Leela: 'I can. As long as I don't have to parallel park.

She takes off her coat, sits in the pilot's seat and pushes down a lever.

Cut to: Planet Express: Hangar. Klaxons beep and a huge piece of machinery lifts the ship to a 45-degree angle. The entire hangar roof retracts so it is open for the ship.

Cut to: Outside Planet Express. Peace officers armed with laser rifles are stationed outside. URL sees the roof open.

URL: 'If they try to take off, give 'em an ass-ful of laser.

Smitty nods.

Cut to: Ships Cockpit.

Leela: Prepare for lift-off. Ten.

Cut to: Times Square.

Crowd: (chanting) 'Nine!

Cut to: Egypt. The future pyramids now rotate in mid-air.

Crowd: (chanting) 'Amania!

Cut to: Paris.

Crowd: (chanting) 'Seven!

Cut to: Somewhere in Ireland's western countryside, Rush as a easter egg character stands in the middle of a muddy field.

Rush: 'Six!

Cut to: Applied Cryogenics: Freezer Room. Lou sits in an open pod and Terry raises a glass.

Terry: (dramatically) 'Five!

Cut to: Head Museum. Leonard Nimoy is wearing a party hat.

Nimoy: 'Four.

Cut to: Ship's Cockpit. Fry, Bender and Farnsworth are sat on a couch at the front of the cockpit.

Farnsworth: 'Three.

Bender: 'Two.

He is so tense that he rips the arms off the couch.

Leela: 'One!

Fry: 'Blast-off!

Cut to:Outside Planet Express. The ship takes off.

Cut to: Times Square. People cheer in the new millennium and fireworks explode all over the city. "3000" is projected onto the moon and the ship flies between the fireworks.

Nixon: 'Fire! Fire!

The peace officers fire their laser guns randomly into the air.

Smitty: 'I can't see nothing. Pretty though!

The altitude of the ship increases and laser bolts narrowly miss it.

Scene:Cockpit. The ship clears New New York airspace, flies through the atmosphere and heads through the solar system. Everyone cheers.

Fry: 'So, I guess, without jobs, we'll be fugitives forever?

Farnsworth: 'Not necessarily. Are you three, by any chance, interested in becoming my new spaceship crew?

Bender: 'New crew? W-what happened to the old crew?

Farnsworth: 'Oh those poor sons of--But that's not important. The important thing is I need a new crew. Anyone interested?

Fry: 'Yes! Yes! That's exactly the job I've always wanted!

Leela: 'Thanks for the offer, Professor, but we don't have the proper career chips.

Farnsworth: 'Oh, that won't be a problem. As luck would have it, I saved the chips from my previous crew.

He empties the career chips out of an envelope marked. Contents Of Space Wasp's Stomach.

Fry: 'This is awesome! Are we gonna fly through space fighting monsters and teaching alien women to lurve?

Farnsworth: 'If by that you mean,transporting cargo, then yes. It's a little home business I started to fund my research.

Fry: 'Cool! What's my job gonna be?

Farnsworth: 'You will be responsible for ensuring that the cargo reaches its destination.

The smile fades from Fry's face.

Fry: 'So, I'm gonna be a delivery boy?

Leela: [Puts her hand on his shoulder]'Its better then nothing, Fry,just take it.

Fry: 'Alright! I'm a delivery boy!

Leela: 'What your hap--Oh never mind!

Fry: (worried) 'We are still going to--

Leela: 'Yes!

Leela takes his hand and smiles.

Fry: 'Leela,I think this is the start of a beautiful relationship.

Fry and Leela walk out of room holding hands.

Farnsworth: 'Aww, young impulsive love. Must be by the Gods of Love themselves. Either Roman or Greek, Priapus,Roman, Cupid Amor and Hestia, and so on. Must of had a part to play in them coming together.

Bender: 'Yea right, I won't have to do any work around here,will I?

Farnsworth: 'Oh my yes, you won't have to do any work, but they will,both off the job,and on the job.

Bender: 'Oh really?

Farnsworthr: 'No O'reilly. Of course!

Bender: 'Well, this sounds like my kind of job.

Farnsworth: 'Wait, where are--

Bender: 'My guess is that they are shooting DNA at each other now, in one of rooms.

Farnsworth: 'What room do you think exactly?

Bender: 'The toilet.

Farnsworth: 'I really don't think in the toilet, but the ship seems to be rocking, none the less.

That changed around universe may be continued.

Scene: Year 793 AD: Off the northeast coast of England. Three dozen or more men who got mostly big scruffy beards, bad hygiene smelling of body odor and then men are the Vikings. Who sail their longboat towards the shore coastline of the great monastery of Lindisfarne. The Vikings armed with axes, swords, trowing-axes, most of them wearing light leather armor, the odd one are wearing chain-mail armor, but most have even the ones who wear leather armor have iron helmets, none have horns. Additionally most are holding in their left hands small round iron shields, some don't have shields but have two handed weapons like Danish battle axes and claymore swords, some have two one handed weapons in each hand, and some are armed with bows for long range combat, and armed with daggers for short range combat. With a flash of light U-J-Bender appears sitting at a seat positioned around the middle of the longboat. The Vikings gasp and chatter in Danish amongst themselves and stop rowing.

U-J-Bender: 'Oh better turn on my transactor. [opens his chest cabinet and flicks a switch somewhere inside.] There.

Viking: 1#(melodramatically) 'I'm Terry. Welcome to the world of yesterday!

U-J-Bender turns his head to look and see who said that, the viking who just spoken sits beside to the left of U-J-Bender who looks very much like Terry from the 31st century, armed with a bow for long range combat, and armed with a dagger for short range combat, wearing leather armor with no helmet.

U-J-Bender: (melodramatically) 'Well, I'm from the world of tomorrow!

Terry: (melodramatically) 'The world of tomorrow?! It's the world of yesterday!

Viking: 2# 'Stop this madness!...Now!...Who are you? Or what are you!? Tin man! Are you sent by the Gods?!

The viking who just spoken sits beside to left of Terry who looks very much like Scruffy from the 31st century, who is armed with a two handed Danish battle axe, wearing chain-mail armor and of course a iron helmet.

U-J-Bender: 'Yes, I have been sent by the Gods. Wait! I think I've seen you somewhere before? What's your name?

Scruffy: 'I'm Scruffy the Housecarl.

U-J-Bender: 'Doesn't ring a bell.

Viking: 3# 'Arrrroooo! And I'm Bixon Goodman the Berserker!

U-J-Bender turns his head to look and see who said that, the viking who just spoken sits beside to the right of U-J-Bender who looks very much like Nixon,who is armed with a short blade scythe, wearing bear hide and wearing a wolf's head as a helmet, plus with a huge thick black grizzly beard hanging out down to his chest.

U-J-Bender: 'Nixon Badman?

Bixon: 'It's Bixon Goodman. Arrrroooo! I will feast on you're bones.

U-J-Bender: 'But I don't have bones.

Bixon: [Raises his scythe up in the air] 'Arrrroooo!

Scruffy: 'Easy now, Bixon Goodman. No need for fighting right now.

Bixon: 'Arrrroooo! I'll let him off lightly this time. [Takes out a small gray pottery cauldron full of ale from underneath his seat. Puts some magic mushrooms in it and drinks it down] Arrrroooo! That's the stuff!

Scruffy: 'You'll need some weapons if you are indeed sent by the Gods...Here, take this.[Scruffy picks up from underneath his seat a longsword and a round iron shield, which he passes to Terry, and which he hands to Bender] May your kill, be quick and many.

U-J-Bender: 'Oh, I'm really gonna love this.

Scruffy: 'Well, lets get rowing then!

There is a flash of light and U-J-Bender disappears.

Scruffy: 'Where did he just go now?

Bixon: 'Arrrroooo! He left us for dead!

Terry: (melodramatically) 'Farewell, from the world of yesterday!

Everyone: 'Shut up, Terry!

Terry: 'Haven't yous ever heard of a little thing called showmanship?

Everyone: 'No!

Terry: 'Alright then. Lets get a shore. Rob everything, kill everyone, burn everything down to the ground with flaming torches , and take some women home with us over are shoulders! What say you?!

Everyone: [Cheering, raising their weapons in the air] 'Hale to that! To Waaaaaaaaaar!

Terry: 'Raid,salvage and pillage!

The viking begins rowing again making their way towards the great monastery of Lindisfarne eager for battle.

Cut To: The Hip Joint:Year 3000. Fry talks to the 21st Century woman sitting at the bar.

Woman: 'You're from the 20th century? That's incredible! I'm from the 21st century.

Fry: 'No way! We've got so much in common.

Woman: 'We sure do. Remem---[There is a flash of light and U-J-Bender appears beside her, only Fry and herself seem to notice him when he appeared out of thin air]Ahhh!

Fry: 'Bender? You're a viking?!

U-J-Bender: 'Yea, what's it to you?--Leave me alone!---No I'm not![puts his longsword and iron shield away inside his chest cabinet] I'm just a poor universe jumping Bender! [Vomits nut bolts on the woman, lights himself up a cigar using his middle finger as a lighter, blows smoke in the women's face. She coughs, gets up of her seat and leaves] Your as cool, as cool, Bender!

Fry: 'Why did you do that for! She could have been my date!

U-J-Bender: [drinking, steeling beers bottle from the bar, and putting them inside his chest cabinet at the same-time] 'Relax chump. There's better fish in the sea. In-fact you should ask Leela out, right now.

Fry: 'I don't know Bender. Maybe, I could. But I don't know what to say.

U-J-Bender: 'Remember what I told you.

Fry: 'What?

U-J-Bender: 'Oh yea I haven't told you. Just say things along lines of; your sexy, you got a fine piece of ass, never met no other woman like you, man I always wanted to do an alien. Ext ext, blah blah, yich yack, blah blah, dribble dribble dribble, blah blah, tell some lies, dribble dribble, blah blah.

Fry: 'Huh?

U-J-Bender: [opens his chest cabinet taking out a small pocket size red book.] 'Take this romantic words dictionary...[hands it to Fry, who looks curious at it scratching the back of his head]...And read it!

There is a flash of light and U-J-Bender disappears.

Sometime later: Fry still sits at the bar looking downcast sad.

Fry: 'Ah, I don't know what I'm gonna do with my life. The future sucks! [Looks around the room, and sees Leela alone at table with a janitor passing by her table, sweeping.] Leela?

Janitor: 'My, my, my! What's a beautiful lady like you-- [Leela looks up.] Oh, my! Eurgh! I'm sorry, I thought you had two eyes.

He runs off.

Fry: 'My good poor Leela...Wait a minute!

Fry walks towards Leela with his hands in his pockets.

Fry: [Near her table] 'Hey Leela, you all right?

Leela: [looks up] 'Fry?..H-how come you didn't get anyone?

[Fry down a cross from Leela on the opposite side of the table.]

Fry: 'Well I guess, I wasn't lucky.

Leela: 'Oh, I wish I had two eyes, then I might get lucky.

Fry: (shouting) 'Don't you ever say that!

Leela: (shouting) 'What? You like me being a outcast?!

Fry: 'No Leela. Look, people who disgruntlement you for having one eye are close minded jerks!....Who are truly of profound unique beauty, and a grant, grant person. And anyone who thinks different, is just plain stupid.

Leela: 'So do you like me?

Fry: 'Yes I do!

Leela narrows her eye.

Fry: 'Oh, damn. I really sorry, I'll go.

Fry is about to get up and walk away, but stops when he feels Leela's warm soft hand on his hand.

[Fry looks up at her face to she's smiling at him.]

Leela: (softly) 'Fry, please don't leave.

Fry: (lost for words) 'Em? I... uh..I--Ummm...I..---

Leela: (very softly) 'No one ever said, such nice things to me.[she walks over to Fry's side of the table and hugs him.] Come on lets go to my place, its gonna be your lucky night.

Scene: Outside The Hip Joint. Fry and Leela walk out the door holding hands.

Leela: 'Lets get a taxi. Taxi!

A Taxi drops down from the sky and lands beside them, Fry opens the door for Leela, she gets inside. Leela then as soon as she's inside the car, pulls Fry inside off guard.

Fry: 'Le--[pulled by Leela on top of her, into a deep kiss on the seat.] Hmm? [Fry becomes limp, and relaxes into the kiss.] Mmmmm----

Taxi Man: 'So where to?

Leela: [kissing Fry] 'Mmmmmmmmmm! [Breaks the kiss and Fry gasps for breath]Apartment 1I!

Taxi Man: 'Alright.

Fry: 'Apartment 1 I? That's fu--[Gets pulled into a kiss by Leela]Hmm! Mmm--

Scene Leela's Apartment Building Corridor. Leela pulls Fry along by the hand up the stairs, but then Fry holds her back.

Fry: 'Wait, Leela!

Leela: 'What is it?

Fry: 'Are sure you want to do this? Don't you think we're just rushing into this? I don't want you to do something you'll regret .

Leela: 'That's sweet of you Fry...[Pulls him the stairs] But I will not regret anything.

Fry: 'But--

Leela: 'Fry! I'm not drunk or under any influence. So what about you? Do you want to do this?

Fry: 'Of course I do.

Fry put his arms around her, their lips meet into a soft kiss.

Fry: (quietly) 'I love you.

Leela: (quietly)'You know what?

Fry: 'What?

Leela: (quietly)'I apparently love you. It's like we're made for her each other or something? Oh, sorry. Am I boring you?

Fry: 'No.

Leela: 'Get in here. [Pulls him along, opens the door] Now!

Leela pulls Fry towards her body into a bear hug and kisses him deeply while she takes him inside.

Scene: Planet Express: Meeting Room. It's the next morning and everyone sits around the table drinking coffee, Fry sits right beside Leela holding her hand on the table.

Bender: 'So, how did it happen? Did he pull a cheap one on you?

Leela: 'No, Fry did not , pull a cheap one on me. And could you please stop talking about my, and my boyfriend's personal life.

Fry: 'Boyfriend? That's me right?

Leela: 'Yes.[hugs Fry and lightly kisses on the lips] It's you.

Farnsworth: 'Yes yes, let's all talk about Leela's and her boyfriend's personal life later. But right now we have business to attend to.

Fry: 'A delivery?

Farnsworth: No. A tax-deductible mission of charity.

He flicks a switch, the lights dim and a translucent holographic image of a planet is projected over the table.

Computer Voice: 'This is Vergon 6.

Farnsworth: 'This is Vergon 6.

Amy: 'Buh!

Farnsworth: 'It's a sunny little doomed planet, inhabited by a number of frisky little doomed animals.

Leela: 'Animals?

Leela elbows Fry

Fry: 'Oh yes, the animals. They need help.

Leela smiles.

Farnsworth: That's right. Animals in desperate need of rescue. You see, Vergon 6 was once filled with a super-dense substance known as dark matter, each pound of which weighs over ten thousand pounds.

Holographic dark matter fills the planet.

Leela: 'Wait! What about the animals?

Farnsworth: 'Well, dark matter is extremely valuable as starship fuel. That's why it was all mined out, leaving the planet completely hollow.

The holographic dark matter dwindles to nothing.

Leela: 'Yes, but what about the animals?

Farnsworth: 'The wha?

Leela: 'The animals.

Farnsworth: 'I didn't say anything about animals. Now it seems that the planet will collapse within three days. Incidentally, this will kill all the animals.

Leela: 'So we have to bring back two of each kind. Just like Noah's Ark.

Bender: 'Why two? [Leela whispers something to him.] Oh! (giggles) Oh oh, wait?! Did you have do that with Fry last night?

Leela: 'Yes, and?

Bender: 'You're cheap!

Leela: [bangs the table] 'Stop it now! I am not cheap!

Fry: 'Bender, leave Leela alone.

Bender: [crossing his arms] 'Alright fine.

Farnsworth: 'What are doing sitting around here? Get your asses in gear!

That changed around universe may be continued.

Scene: Bender's Original Universe: New New York City Street: Time Midday. Zoidberg stands near a opening of a alleyway wearing a sign on his chest, advertising "Sex-Jelly". People walk past not making eye contact avoiding him. But then some really obese man walks towards Zoidberg, wearing; a white shirt, green pants and a pair of glasses, who looks very much like Petter Griffin out of "Family Guy".

Man: 'Yes, I'll have two pounds.

Zoidberg: [tiredly pointing in the direction of the alleyway] 'In there.

Scene Wormhole Gateway Dimension To Universes. Bender falls sleeping through the wormhole.

U-J-Bender: (sleep-talking) Kill all humans...kill all humans...kill all humans--

There is a flash of light and U-J-Bender disappears.

Scene: Titanic Deck. Fry and Leela stand outside, looking at the stars.

Leela: 'Well, our accommodations aren't great, but it sure is beautiful out here.

Fry: 'Yeah, it's pretty romantic-- Uh, I mean platonic. Th-That sure is one platonic view!

Leela: 'Fry, just be quiet. I'm beginning to think this whole fake fiancé thing was a terrible, terrible--

She turns and gasps, then grabs Fry and kisses him deeply and turns her back to face Zapp.

Fry: 'Hmm?[Fry becomes limp, and relaxes into this kiss.] Mmm--

Zapp: 'Leela, perhaps this is an awkward time but if things don't work out with this pipsqueak here ... [He puts his hand on her shoulder.] ... I just want you to know I'll be there to score you on the rebound.

He walks away, humming. Leela stops kissing Fry.

Leela: 'Uh, look, before you get any crazy ideas, that was for Zapp.

Fry: 'Well, you got anything else for him?

Leela: 'Alright, can we try not to complicate this?

Amy and her parents arrive.

Amy: 'Mom, Dad, I'd like you to meet Fry, my boyfriend.

U-J-Bender falls from the air and lands on top of Amy.

Amy: 'Ow! [Struggling to push him off] Get em off me! Get em off me--

Leela: 'Oh my lord! He just came out of nowhere.

Bender: (sleep-talking) 'Kill all humans...kill all humans...kill all humans--

Amy: 'HellllP! He's crushing me! Get em off me!

Leela pushes Bender off Amy, making him roll on the floor. And then with a flash of light, Bender disappears.

Leela: 'Well, that was weird...Lets never speak of it again. Cause If we do so we might disrupt the space time continue. Agreed?

Everyone nods.

Fry: 'Well referring to, before that happened, I'm you're boyfriend Amy? Since when?

Leo: 'Amy! You told us you had a boyfriend, that will give us grandchild!

Amy: [Giving Fry a begging look as if to say yes] 'He is my boyfriend!

Leela: [Grabbing Fry] 'No he's not. Are you?

Fry: 'Nooo. I'm having some'thin good with you right now.

Leela: 'See. [Sticking her tongue out] Ha!

Inez: 'You Sotsuke!

Amy: 'I'm not a lier!

Inez: 'You are! Anyming, you're in big trouble young lady. [Grabs Amy by the ear pulling her along] Your gonna get us grandchild one way, or the other!

Amy: 'Ow! Not so tight!

Some later: The staff relax in swimsuits by the pool. Fry lies on a sun-bed wearing a pair of blue boxer and a white t-shirt, beside Leela who also lies on a sun-bed wearing a green swimsuit with a hole around the navel.

Fry: 'You know, I really consider my fake relationship with you very meaningful.

Leela: 'You do?

Fry: 'Yea, so uh, do you think, we could get into a real relationship?

Leela: 'I don't know Fry. Maybe , I'll think about it.

Amy walks towards them.

Amy: 'Hey Leela! Can we have a little talk in private for a sec?

Leela: 'Sure.

Sometime later.

Scene: Titanic Deck. The staff, Kif and the fat man limbo. Zoidberg clears the stick. Leela stands up beside Amy.

Zoidberg: 'Aha!

Farnsworth has a go.

Fry: 'Go, Professor!

Leela: 'Sorry Amy.

Amy: 'It's okay. Lean back more!

Farnsworth smacks straight into the pole.

Farnsworth: 'Ow!

Hermes and LaBarbara stand away from the game.

Fry: [Walking towards Leela, and stopping beside her] 'Leela, why don't you try?

Leela: (shy) 'Me? Try limbo? Um, uh--

Fry: 'Come on, I'll cheer you on.

Leela: (shy) 'Really?

Fry: 'Yes.

Leela: (shy) 'Okay, I'll try. No!...(speaking firmly)There is no try, I'll do it!

Leela leans back.

Fry: [Fry is the only one cheering her on, apart from Amy too] 'Woo! Go Leela. You're the woman!

Amy: 'Go on!

Leela goes right underneath doing a perfect limbo. Everyone claps, cheers and whistles congratulating Leela.

Leela: [Stand up, raising her arms in air] 'Wooooo! Ha! Ha! I did it! [She walks towards Fry, kisses him on the cheek and hugs him] Thank you.

LaBarbara: 'Eh, I've seen lower. Come on, Hermes, you could out-limbo all of these people!

Hermes: 'Don't be a dog heart, woman. You know I can't. Not after what happened.

A small bit later: Hermes cries and LaBarbara pats him on the back. Leela still hugs Fry but now rests her head on his shoulder.

LaBarbara: 'There, there. Now you don't have to limbo if you don't want. It doesn't make you any less of a man.

Farnsworth: 'Though it did get me some action!

Hattie hangs onto his arm.

Hattie: I like a man who's flexible!

Enter Zapp and Kif near the pool.

Zapp: 'Your attention, please. As captain of this vessel, the terrible burden of naming a limbo contest winner is mine and mine alone.

Kif: Shouldn't you be steering between the comets?

Zapp: 'And the winner is, Leela!

Leela: [Looking up] 'I know! Well thank you, I guess.

Zapp: 'Yes, but even if didn't I would of made you win anyway. I know from personal experience how horizontal you can get. As your reward, you and that hairpile are invited to dine at the captain's table this evening.

Fry: 'Woo!...[Leela slaps him] Ow!

Leela: 'Fry!

Sometime later: Bender and the Countess lean over the rail on the deck.

Bender: 'Well, now you know. I'm not actually rich. I'm a fraud. A poor, lazy, sexy fraud. This isn't even a real bow-tie, it's magnetic.

He takes the bow-tie off and throws it against the wall where it sticks.

Countess: 'Bender, I don't care whether you have money. I love you for your artificial intelligence and your sincerity simulator.

Bender: You do? Really?

The Countess nods. She and Bender kiss.

Sometime later: In the Titanic Buffet. A sign advertises "All You Can Eat Plus A Whole Chicken". Fry, Leela, Farnsworth and Hattie sit with Zapp around the captain's table wearing formal evening wear. Zapp wears a formal off-white DOOP jacket with medals.

Zapp: 'I like your style, Fry. You remind me of a young me. Not much younger, mind you. Perhaps even a couple of years older.

Fry: 'Thank you, sir.

Zapp: 'As a gentleman, I must warn you. If you so much as glance at another woman, I'll be all over Leela like a fly on a pile of very seductive manure.

Fry: 'Well, rest assured, Leela's the only girl for me. [Leela smiles] In-fact. she's the only girl I've seen on this boat--

Zapp: 'Space ship.

Fry: 'Yea well whatever, there was this ship called Titanic that only had once!................My God! We're in a death trap!

Leela: 'How?

Fry: (worried) 'Ever read you history Leela? The ship called Titanic snaked in the sea!

Leela: 'One, yes I have read my history. Two that was a ship, this is a space ship.

Fry: (sarcastic) 'Oh, like you don't know what I'm getting at.

Leela: 'Fry! Just because this space ship, is named after the Titanic. Doesn't mean history will repeats itself.

Fry: (calmly) 'Yea, I guess you're right.

Zapp: [speaking quietly, looking over his shoulder] 'Where are the Wong's? Get in the game. [Taps his glass, speaking normally] I'd like to impose a toast on the happy couple. Down the hatch!

Leela wrapping her arms around Fry pulling him into a deep kiss the others around the table cheer apart from Zapp, who's eyes narrow.

Fry: 'Hmm? [Fry becomes limp, and relaxes into this kiss. Mmmmmmmmmm! [Leela breaks the kiss] I wanna tell you something.

Leela: (softy) 'What?

Fry: 'I-I love you Leela! And I always have.

Leela: [tears filling her eye] 'Oh, Fry. Why didn't you tell me this before?

Fry: 'Uh, ah, I was too nervous...So what about you? Do you--

Leela: (crying) 'Yes! [hugs him tightly causing him to winch in pain] I do. Love you too, Fry!

Hermes: 'Ah, God. Now I gotta do lots of paperwork on this.

[Zappstands up, glaring at them]

Zapp: 'So that's it then? [thumbs the table] Answer me!

Leela: (quietly) 'Zapp, ju, just just go away.

[Zapp walks off fuming.]

Fry: 'Why to tell him off, Lee-....[gets pulled into another kiss] Hmm? [Fry becomes limp, and relaxes into this kiss. Mmmmmmm--

Farnsworth: 'Aww, young love.

Hattie: (sexfully) 'Old love.

Farnsworth: 'Ewww.

Scene: Titanic Wheel Room. Kif stands looking outside with his hands behind his back,the comets outside fly very close to the ship.

Kif: 'Oh, It's looking 24th century out there! Better go get the jackass.[Zapp walks in crying] Oh sir there's something that requires your attention.

Zapp: (crying) 'Not now Kif!

Kif: 'But sir.

Zapp: (crying) 'I told you! Not now Kif!

Kif: 'It's an emergency, sir.

Zapp: (crying) 'Tell me when it's a catastrophe. [There is a crash and the ship shakes. Zapp falls over] Ow! [stop crying, and stands up.] Oh, very well.

Kif: 'Sir, remember your course correction?

Zapp: 'No!

Kif: 'Well it's proving somewhat more suicidal than we'd initially hoped.

Zapp: 'Kif, old friend, I don't know which disgusts me more: Your cowardice or your stupidity! We'll simply set a new course for that empty region over there. Near that black-ish hole-ish thing. That''ll will win Leela's heart!

He points at the black-ish hole-ish thing and grins. Kif's jaw drops.

Scene: Titanic Deck. Fry and Leela look over the railing holding hands.

Fry: 'Leela, before this ends I want you to know, I truly deeply love you.

Leela: [taking both of his hands, speaking softly] 'Fry, what are talking about?

Fry: 'Leela--

Leela: 'Fry, I gotta be fully honest, so to get this into your head...We're not in a fake relationship anymore. In-fact we sort of never were, in a fake relationship.

Fry: 'Leela, I'm confused.

Leela: 'Lets just say, it's my confusing and strange way of axing you out.

Fry: [sees the nebula] 'Whoa! Look out there Leela.

Leela: 'That's a lovely looking nebula.

They look down at the couples on the decks below and see Hermes and LaBarbara; Bender and the Countess; Mr. and Mrs. Wong; Dr. Zoidberg and with a jellyfish like alien; Farnsworth and Hattie.

Fry: 'Leela.

Leela: 'Fry.

They gaze into each other's eyes and lean in to kiss. The ship shakes, Leela loses her balance, head butts Fry and they both fall over.

Leela: What was that? [She looks over the railings and sees.] Oh, my God! We're heading straight into a black hole.

Fry: 'Talk about a mood killer!

Leela: 'Oh Fry, we'll have time for that later!

Scene: Titanic Wheel Room.

Zapp: 'Don't blame yourself, Kif. We were doomed from the start. Nothing remains now but for the captain to go down with his ship.

Kif: 'Why, that's surprisingly noble of you, sir.

Zapp: No, it's noble of you, Kif! [He tears his captain's patch off.] As of now ... [He puts the patch on Kif.] ... you're in command. Congratulations, captain!

He leaves and flies past the wheel room in an escape pod. Kif sighs.

Scene: Titanic Deck. People run about in a panic. The staff look at a deck plan of the Titanic.

Leela: 'OK. We just have to get from here to the escape pods.

"Here" is the front of the ship. The escape pods are located at the back. The map breaks in half and the ship itself begins to tear in half.

Farnsworth: (shouting) 'I'm too young to die!

Leela: 'Come on, before it's too late!

Bender: 'You all go without me. I'm gonna take one last look around. You know, for, uh, stuff to steal.

Fry: 'You're going back or the Countess, aren't you?

Bender pulls Fry aside.

Bender: (whispering) 'Alright, I am. But I don't want the others to know. If I don't come back, just say I died robbing some old man.

Fry: I''ll tell them you went out prying the wedding ring off his cold, dead finger.

Bender: 'I love you, buddy!

Bender hugs Fry then runs off.

Cut to: Titanic Casino. The fruit machines and tables are overturned, fires burn and there is a huge hole in the middle of the floor. Bender runs in to the room.

Bender: (shouting) 'Countess? Countess?

Countess: (shouting) 'Bender!

Bender looks around and sees the Countess' hat by the hole. He rushes over and peers into the hole. The Countess is trapped in a burning room. She is huddled in a corner away from the flames.

Countess: (shouting) 'I fell through the deck.

Bender: (shouting) 'Are you hurt, my sweet?

Countess: (shouting) 'No. Luckily a family broke my fall.

Bender: 'Just hang on! I'll take care of that fire!

He grabs a fire hose and jumps through the hole.

Cut to: Titanic Room. Bender lands in the middle of the room and sprays the flames with water, extinguishing the fire. He leaves the hose and hugs the Countess.

Countess: 'Bender, you risked your life to save me.

Bender: 'And I'd do it again. And perhaps a third time. But that would be it. [They kiss.] When we kiss, I feel like I'm standing waist-deep in a pool of cold, rising water.

They both look down and see they are standing waist-deep in a pool of cold, rising water. They scream and shout as it gets closer to their heads.

Scene: Titanic Corridor. The staff run around a corner. Fry carries Farnsworth on his back.

Leela: 'Hurry! The escape pods should be just ahead!

Hermes: (gasping) 'Faster!

There is a crash and the emergency airlock begins to close. The staff run forwards to get under it. Zoidberg dives and wedges his claw under it. It stops moving. Leela tries to lift it.

Leela: 'It won't move. And the door release is on the other side.

Fry: 'Then we're dead meat. No one could squeeze under there!

Leela: 'What about be?

Fry: 'Okay, go for it. I'll cheer you on!

Leela: (shy) 'Okay.

Leela leans back and squeezes under the door, the door slides up. They all cheer and rush through,apart from Hermes and LaBarbara who still rush through but don't cheer. And even Fry who's lost in thought looking at Leela.

Leela: [runs over to Fry, and pulls him along by the hand running] 'Come on, Fry!

Scene: Titanic Room. The water rises and completely covers the robots. They stop screaming.

Countess: 'Well, now what are we going to do?

Bender: 'Wait a second. Aren't you a member of the yacht club?

Countess: 'By God, you're right! I'm a class-3 yacht.

A propeller comes out from under her. Bender hops on and they rise to the surface.

Scene: Titanic Deck. Passengers board the escape pods.

Farnsworth: 'Thank God there are plenty of escape pods. We won't have to dress up like women and children.

He takes his hat off and throws his lolly down. He and the others run into the escape pod. Leela and Fry stop outside holding hands.

Leela: 'We can't leave yet. We've got to wait for Bender. The high gravity must be slowing down his looting.

Amy's parents walk out onto the deck.

Mrs. Wong: 'Amy!

Amy: 'Mom? Dad? You're alive!

Mr. Wong: 'Yeah, but so what? The important thing is we found you a new man.

Mrs. Wong: 'A captain.

Amy: 'Uh, Mom, I don't-- [Enter Kif.] Hi!

Kif: (sexfully) 'Hello!

Kif picks Amy up and carries her to the escape pod. They kiss.

Cut to: Escape Pod. The ship begins to twist and distort.

Farnsworth: 'I don't feel well!

His head twists around like a squishy goo.

Cut to: Titanic Deck. Fry points at something in space.

Fry: 'Look! It's our nebula. Whenever I see it I'll think back to that moment when we almost-- [The nebula is sucked into the black hole.] Oh, Never mind!

Leela: 'Kissed?

Fry: 'Yeah. [Leela wraps her arms around him and kisses him deeply]Mmmmmmm--

Hermes pokes his head out of the escape pod.

Hermes: 'Everyone else is off the ship. Where in Babylon is Bender?

Leela: [Breaks the kiss.] 'I don't know. But we can't wait any longer.

She gets into the pod and Fry follows. He looks back at the ship.

Fry: 'Goodbye, Bender.

He closes the hatch. Bender and the Countess run out of the ship panting.

Bender: (shouting) 'Wait for us!

The escape pod lifts off and the airlock between it and the Titanic deck seals. Bender and the Countess leap from the deck, smashing through the glass airlock.

Cut to: Outside Escape Pod. Bender and the Countess float towards the pod and Bender reaches out his hand.

Cut to: Escape Pod. It rocks as Bender grabs hold. Everyone sits along the length of the pod and Leela steers.

Leela: 'Something's wrong. We're two metric tons overweight.

Amy: 'Well, it's not me!

Fry looks out of the airlock window.

Fry: 'Look!

Everyone looks out the window to see Bender and the Countess.

Cut to: Outside Escape Pod. The Titanic creaks and is sucked into the black hole. The escape pod starts to drift back towards it.

Countess: 'I'm slipping, Bender. The pull is too strong!

She slips from Bender's grasp but he grabs on to her bracelet. It's all that holds them together. She screams.

Bender: 'I can't live without you. If you let go, I let go!

Countess: 'No! You have too much to live for. It may hurt for a while but one day you'll share your love again. After all, it's shareware.

Bender: 'Don't talk like that. Tragic romances always have a happy ending.

The bracelet snaps and the Countess falls towards the black hole.

Countess: 'Farewellllllllllll!

The black hole sucks her in.

Bender: (shouting) 'No!

Cut to: Escape Pod. Bender walks in and closes the airlock behind him.

Bender: 'She's gone.

Leela: 'But she saved all our lives. Without her, we're light enough to get away.

Bender slams his head against the airlock and cries.

Fry: 'Don't cry, Bender. Nobody really knows what happens in a black hole. It's possible she's still alive in another dimension somewhere. Right, Professor?

Farnsworth: 'Oh, yes, absolutely! [He turns to Zoidberg.] Not a chance!

He draws his finger across his neck and mimes being hung.

Bender: 'At least I'll always have her bracelet! [He hands it to Hermes.] What do you think it's worth?

Hermes takes a look at it.

Hermes: 'It's fake, mon!

Bender cries as the pod flies away into space.

Scene: Outside Planet Express. Bender dumps the Countess de la Roca's fake bracelet in a bin and walks into the building with the other staff apart from Fry and Leela who hang outside making-out, and plus Amy who kisses Kif and gives him her number.

Amy: 'Call me.

Kif takes the paper and she goes inside. He trembles and gasps and breathes heavily some more.

Cut to: Wormhole Gateway Dimension To Universes. Bender falls sleeping through the wormhole.

U-J-Bender: (sleep-talking) 'Kill all humans...kill all humans...kill all humans--

Scene: Back to this Universe: Outside Planet Express. Fry and Leela walk out of the down the street by the river looking up at the stars.

Leela: 'Fry, ever look up at the stars, and dream about something?

Fry: (sad) 'Yeah, I once dreamed about being astronaut, from looking at moon or the stars, and plus being a superhero.

Leela: [Hugs him, and kisses him on the cheek] 'I'm sorry about that. You were right the moon is beautiful. You helped see the inner beautify of things. 

Fry: 'Yeah, I love you, Leela.

Leela: 'So do I. [squeezes him] Fry?

Fry: 'Mmm?

Leela: 'I dreamed about having, or meeting my parents. [Her eye fills with tears] I've looked across the Universe. But still I have not found them. (crying heavily) My parents....they.....they must be.... ashamed..... of me!

Fry: (thinking) 'I never knew she's a orphan.

Fry hugs her tightly, places one hand at the back of neck letting her cry on his shoulder.

Fry: (softly) 'Never say that about yourself Leela. You're a great person, and I think they think so too. And who knows you might find them someday.

Leela takes off her bobbin letting her hair down. Fry gasps, Leela smiles, and then she nibs on his ear.

Leela: (sexfully) 'I'm gonna eat you alive tonight. [Fry makes a nervous weep, Leela laughs] Oh, not literally, Fry.

From the sewers Leela's parents look up at her.

Leela: (very softly) 'Love you truly, and deeply Fry.

Leela pulls Fry into a deep kiss.

Fry: 'Hmm? [Fry becomes limp, and relaxes into this kiss. Mmmm--

Cut to: Wormhole Gateway Dimension To Universes. Bender falls sleeping through the wormhole.

U-J-Bender: (sleep-talking) Kill all humans...Kill all humans...Kill all humans--

Scene: Back to this Universe: Outside Planet Express. Fry and Leela are still making-out. Leela breaks the kiss after along time, Fry gasps for breath.

Leela: (sexfully) 'And there's more where that came from.

Fry: (still gasping) 'I love you.

Leela: 'I love you too. Now lets go to my place.

Leela takes his hand, the two lovers walk in the star lit sky out of sight.

Fade out.

Fry: 'One question?

Leela: 'What?

Fry: 'What's the name of you're apartment?

Leela: 'Apartment 1 I.

Fry: 'That's a funn--funky name Leela.

Leela: 'Why, thank you. And you were right about history repeating itself.

Fry: 'I was. Wasn't I?

Leela: 'You sure were.

That changed around universe may be continued.

Cut to: Wormhole Gateway Dimension To Universes. Bender falls sleeping through the wormhole.

U-J-Bender: (waking up) 'Ah, here again, huh?

There is a flash of light and U-J-Bender disappears.

Scene Mount Everest. U-J-Bender appears on top of Everest, slips and falls down.

U-J-Bender: (screaming)'You know this is getting ridiculous! --[hits his head against the mountain]Ow! Ahhhhhhhhhhhh--[takes a breath] Ahhhhhhhhhhhh--[hits his head against the mountain]Ow! Ahhhhhhhhhhhh--[takes a breath] Ahhhhhhhhhhhh--[hits his head against the mountain]Ow!

There is a flash of light and U-J-Bender disappears.