Fan Fiction

That Darn Fox
By Rush

Title suggested by Red_Line

Scene: Planet Express: Lounge. Bender sits in the middle of the couch with his eyes closed and has the very same ears from episode Godfella with the very same ear plugs, on the left sits Fry with his eyes tightly shut and both of his index fingers are in both of his ears, Amy on the right is screaming and crying, on TV is Justin Bieber's (In his teenage years) head in a jar singing.

Justin Bieber: 'Like baby, baby, baby ohhhhh!

[Leela walks in, seeing what's on TV, puts her hands over her ears, turns around and walks back out.]

Amy: (shouting) 'You're not even watching it!

Fry: (shouting) 'Please, anything but this Justin Beaver!

Amy: 'It's Bieber, not Beaver!

Bender: 'Worst song ever, period! Like how is this one thousand year old living fossil still even remembered?!

Fry: 'I agree! I never even heard of this guy until yesterday.

Amy: 'Shut up haters! [She slaps the both of them.]

Fry: 'Ow! We have a right to our opinions too. [Bender grows rapidly in size to about 10 time bigger turning green.]

Hulk Bender: (shouting in a deep Hulk like voice) 'Hulk, smash! [He runs over to the TV, rips it off the wall, throws it onto the floor, stomps on it repeatedly.] Hulk bash, Hulk smash, Hulk hate machine! Hulk, hate Justin Beaver! [He then repeatedly pounds it with his fists (by now the TV is reduced to tiny pieces). Satisfied having destroyed the TV, Hulk Bender now jumps through the roof.] Hulk, go on rampage now!

Fry: 'Look what you've done Amy?! You made Bender become the Incredible Hulk!

Amy: 'I'm sorry.

Fry: 'It's OK.

Cut to: Outside Planet Express. Hulk Bender lands in the middle of the street, cracking the ground creating huge a shock wave knocking over several pedestrians.

Hulk Bender: (shouting) 'Hulk, hate city! [Zoidberg walks past, while everyone else runs away.] Hulk, especially hate red crab lobster thing! [Zoidberg screams cowering in terror, Hulk Bender kicks him sending him high into the air out to sea.]

Cut to: Out To Sea. New New York can be seen in the background in the distance.

Zoidberg: 'Ahhhhhhhh! [He lands in the sea, then swims back up to the surface.] Aww, I have to swim that far?! [He begins making his way back to New New York with a backstroke.]

Cut to: Outside Planet Express. Hulk Bender picks up a red parked hover car, and throws it at a suicide booth, knocking it over.

Hulk Bender: 'Hulk hate machine! [Fry runs out of Planet Express.] (softly) Frrrrriend? [With sounds of police sirens come hover cop cars that surround the Planet Express building, along with the Nimbus itself above the Planet Express building.]

Zapp: 'Surrender Hulk.

Fry: 'He--

Cut to: Nimbus Bridge. Zapp sits in the driver seat, while Kif stands at the co-ordinates controls.

Fry's Voice On The Computer: 'Leave him alone, he'll turn back to normal when he's calmed down!

Zapp: 'No--

Cut to: Outside the Nimbus.

Zapp's Voice On Microphone: 'Can do. He's military property, and must be captured. Oh, and thanks for finding him for us.

Cut to: Nimbus Bridge. Kif enters an escape pod.

Cut down below to Planet Express. In the background an escape pod lands in the sea, which then deploys sales, which is uses to sale off out of sight very quickly.

Zapp's Voice On Microphone: 'Eat laser! [He fires a laser at Hulk Bender, that he just absorbs, having no effect on him what's so ever.] Wait, I've tried that before. [Hulk Bender jumps high into the air on top of the Nimbus.] Oh crap! [Hulk Bender slams his fists down the Nimbus causing it to crash land in the sea, leaving half of the Nimbus submerged.] That wasn't smart. [Hulk Bender jumps high into the air again onto the top of a skyscraper.]

Cut to: Top of skyscraper. Hulk Bender grabs the lightning rod, and not only bends the lightning rod but the whole skyscraper itself downward meeting the ground, and miraculously the skyscraper doesn't snap. Hulk Bender jumps high into the air again.]

Cut to: New New York City Street. Hulk Bender lands in the middle of the street causing the ground to crack before Destructor.

Destructor: 'Finally a worthy foe. [He runs towards Hulk Bender, who just flicks him away with his finger making him slam into a building, causing debris to fall on him.] Ow! [Hulk Bender runs towards Destructor, picks him up and throws him high into the sky.]

Cut to: The Moon. Destructor blasting off like a fireball out of Earth lands on the moon.

Destructor: 'Ow!

Cut to: Concert. With Justin Bieber head in jar on stage singing.

Justin Bieber: 'Like baby, baby, baby ohhhhh! [Hulk Bender bursts through the floor, landing on the stage.]

Hulk Bender: 'Hulk hate Justin Beaver! [He grabs Justin Bieber and jumps through the floor in a different place.]

Cut to: Skyscraper. Hulk Bender lands on a Skyscraper that conveniently has a ion cannon on top of it. Hulk Bender loads screaming Justin Bieber's head in jar into the cannon and fires it.

Cut to: The Sun. Justin Bieber goes into the sun.

Cut to: Skyscraper. Hulk Bender jumps off the Skyscraper down below to the street, before Leela on the footpath.

Hulk Bender: '(softly) Frrrrriend? [Leela takes something out of her handbag.]

Leela: 'Look at this? [Leela shows Hulk Bender's reflection in her make up mirror.]

Hulk Bender: 'Hulk … machine? Then Hulk hate Hulk! [He starts punching himself.]

Fade out: We now see Bender in his lounge at Robot Arms Apartments with his finger in a socket giving him a electric shock.

The End

Cubert: 'Whoa Rush, yet another unoriginal cheesy tedious repetitive fan fiction and not to mention filled with spelling errors and bad grammar and possible other things, that very few will read?

Rush: 'Eh, I'll keep on writing anyway.

Cubert: 'And how come it has nothing to do with Fox?

Rush: 'Because this was just meant to be yet another random insane quick read fan fiction.

Cubert: 'Fair enough.

Rush: 'Then again, I might as well do something about Fox. Universe Jumping Bender you're up!

Scene: Outside Fox Broadcasting Company skyscraper, storm clouds gather above the building. Cue lightning striking the building.

Cut to: In an office. Rupert Murdoch sits at the end of the conference table, addressing the other Fox executives.

Rupert Murdoch: 'We have now successfully cancelled Firefly. [They all laugh maniacally.] Now, it is time to cancel the popular show with many devoted fans: Futurama and replace it with Reality TV Shows, Game Shows, and maybe even Soap Operas. [They all laugh maniacally.] I have to say we did a good job messing with Futurama's time slot and stopping it from showing all together during sporting events, making it difficult to predict when new episodes would air. [They all laugh maniacally.] And then try close down all those Futurama fan sites, we want to erase Futurama from history! [They all laugh maniacally.] And take down videos on the Internet claiming copyright infringement, even if they contain small clips of Futurama, and even if they help the fandom more rather than hurt it. [They all laugh maniacally. There is a blinding flash of light and U-J-Bender appears standing on the middle of the conference table holding a huge chain gun.] What the hell?!

U-J-Bender: 'Eat laser mini gun Fox! [He spins around in a circle spraying Rupert Murdoch and all the other Fox executives with lasers, killing them.] (screaming) Ahhaaahhhhaaaahhhhhh! [He stops spinning around in circles and firing his chain gun, realizing that he's killed everyone in the room.] Didn’t expect that, did ya?

[There is a blinding flash of light, followed by the disappearance of U-J-Bender.]

Rush: 'Now how about that?

Cubert: 'OK, I guess.

Rush: 'You didn’t give me of your long winded explanations this time did ya?

Cubert: 'Speak for yourself.

Now guys, girls and whatever else, I wouldn't do what Bender did there to Fox (despite the fact how much I hate them) in this fan fiction in real life. I'm just fooling around.