Fan Fiction

Ponies And U-J-Benders
By Rush

Scene: The ruined city of London. Alliance forces and their alien allies on the ground desperately fight the twisted and mutated synthetic creatures of the Reapers and the Reapers themselves, who walk towards them firing huge red laser beams. But then all of a sudden there are many blinding flashes of lights, followed by the appearance of hundreds of giant Ponies and giant U-J-Benders who engage the Reapers in combat. The Ponies fire big red laser beams from their eyes vaporizing the synthetic creatures and tearing the Reapers apart, while the U-J-Benders drop big bricks from underneath them, which they pick up, then throw at the synthetic creatures crushing them, however the bricks only leave dents on the the Reapers knocking over the odd Reaper. When the Reapers fire their lasers at the Ponies and U-J-Benders it seems to have no effect on them what's so ever.

Cut to: Earth. Alliance and alien ships fight the Reapers just outside Earth's atmosphere, but there is blinding flashes of light followed by the appearance of hundreds of Pegasi Ponies, who somehow are able to breathe in space and fire laser beams from their eyes blasting the Reapers apart, who also appear to be immune to the Reaper's lasers.

Cut to: London. In a ruined London street the default appearance of Male Commander Shepard with all of his squad look up in the sky in shock seeing Ponies and U-J-Benders helping them fight the Reapers.

Commander Shepard: 'What the hell is going on?

[More blinding flashes of lights happen, followed by the appearance of giant Unicorn Ponies, who use the magic from their horns to levitate the Reapers up, then proceed to slam them up and down off the ground, the Unicorn Ponies also appear to be immune to the Reaper's lasers.]

Cut to: Big Ben. Ponies and U-J-Benders walk down the street stepping on thus crushing the Reaper's synthetic creatures.

Cut to: Back to Commander Shepard talking on radio.

Commander Shepard: 'What are they?

Admiral Hackett: (on radio) 'We are not sure what they are. All we know these things seem to be aiding us against the Reapers, for we have not one report of them firing at us. In fact the Pony ones seem to be cuddling our ships protecting us from Reaper fire. [Quick cut to Pegasi Ponies with their eyes closed hugging Alliance and alien ships saying "Awwww".]

Commander Shepard: 'That's very strange.

Admiral Hackett: (on radio) 'We mightn't have to use the Crucible at all, for we have incoming reports that these giant Pony and Robots are helping us fight Reapers from all across the galaxy.

Commander Shepard: 'Yeah, let's not use the Crucible.

[Bender wakes up in his apartment at night lying on his couch.]

Bender: 'Still a better ending than Mass Effect 3.

The End