Fan Fiction

LOTR rama
By Rush

Scene: Dark Under Ground Cave. The universe looks similar to the Futurama-verse (Well at least in color.) Gollum (Sméagol from The Lord OF The Rings) sits on a rock looking at The One Ring Of Power which he strokes.

Gollum: 'My precious. [There is a blinding flash of light, followed by the appearance of U-J-Bender next to Gollum.] Whats trickery is thises?! [Bender's eyes zoom in on the One Ring, he then retracts his eyes back.]

U-J-Bender: 'Gimme that! [He punches Gollum knocking him over into water, causing him to lose his grip on the One Ring, which U-J-Bender grabs in mid air.] It's my precious! Ring goes on. [Bender puts the One Ring on his finger and he becomes invisible.] Ring goes off. [U-J-Bender reappears from pulling the One Ring off.] Ring goes on. [U-J-Bender becomes invisible. Gollum jumps out of the water jumping on top of invisible U-J-Bender.] Hey, get off!

Gollum: 'Me wants precious backes! [He hits invisible U-J-Bender.]

U-J-Bender: 'Ow!

[There is a blinding flash of light and Gollum disappears.]

Cut to: Wormhole Gateway Dimension To Universes. Gollum appears with a blinding flash of light holding onto with his legs and hitting with his fists what appears to be nothing.

Gollum: 'Give me the precious back.

Invisible U-J-Bender: 'Ow, stop hitting me

[There is a blinding flash of light and Gollum disappears.]

Cut to: Mount Everest. Gollum who appears to be holding onto nothing slips and falls down the mountain.

Invisible U-J-Bender: 'Hey, let go already! [Sound of metal hitting off rock.] Ow, my head!

Gollum: 'You stole it from us! [There is a blinding flash of light, followed by the disappearance of Gollum.]

Cut to: Apartment 1I : Leela's Bedroom. Fry and Leela both naked make out in bed, there is a blinding flash of light in front of the bed and Gollum appears in mid air hitting something invisible. Leela screams covering herself with the blanket and sheet.

Fry: 'What the hell?

Invisible U-J-Bender: 'Ahhhh! [Gollum is thrown head first towards the wall by an invisible force.]

Gollum: [rubbing his head.] 'Ow. [He jumps and lands on Invisible U-J-Bender.]

Invisible U-J-Bender: 'Oh, come on! [Gollum hits Invisible U-J-Bender.] Ow!

[There is a blinding flash of light and Gollum disappears.]

Cut to: Planet Express: Meeting Room. All the PE staff except Bender (who isn't even in the room.) sit around the conference table.

Hermes: 'So on today's-- [There is a blinding flash of light and Gollum appears in mid air on the conference table hitting something invisible.] OK, what? [Gollum bites something, U-J-Bender screams, then reappears falling to his knees crying (Gollum bit his finger off.)]

Fry: [standing up] 'Bender, are you OK!

Bender: (shouting) 'Do I look OK? That thing bit my finger off. [Gollum jumps in the air happily holding the One Ring.]

Leela [standing up] 'You can always buy a new finger.

Fry: 'Great to have you back Bender.

Gollum: 'Yesssss! [Bender stands up.]

Bender: 'I'm gonna kill that thing!

Farnsworth: 'Wait.

Bender: 'OK.

Farnsworth: 'That is the One Ring Of Power? [Zoidberg stares at it.] It is mine! [He takes a ray gun out pointing it at Gollum.] Hand it over.

Zoidberg: 'Aww!

Bender: 'It belongs to me!

Gollum: 'No, precious is mine!

[Hermes, Scruffy and Amy leave the room.]

Hermes: 'We decided not to go off our rockers.

[Leela pulls the ray run out of Farnsworth's hands.]

Farnsworth: 'Aww.

Leela: 'The ring must be destroyed.

Gollum: 'Noooooooooooo! [Leela jumps into the air, and kicks Gollum across the room.] Hi-yah!

Gollum: 'Ow, you hurts us. [Leela jumps off the table, then picks up the One Ring.]

Fry: 'What are you waiting for, destroy it?

Leela: 'We need to take it to Mount Doom Fry. [Gollum jumps at Leela, who kicks him back across the room.]

Fry: 'Oh yeah!

Farnsworth: 'Please Leela no.

Bender: 'How's Sauron gonna get into another universe?

Leela: 'He'll find away, and it would lead to the end of freedom and most of life in the universe. Sauron has powers to corrupt life itself, and his Orcs will have access to our technology. [Gollum walks towards Leela, Leela shoots the floor near him with the ray gun, and Gollum backs off.]

Farnsworth: 'Well it's a good thing I upgraded the Planet Express Ship to be able to teleport into another universe, and always in a safe location.

Leela: 'Since when?

Farnsworth: 'Since a few hours ago... Now, let's go.

[Farnsworth, Fry, Leela, and Bender walk up the steps of the PE Ship, followed by Zoidberg.]

Farnsworth: [To Zoidberg] 'You don't get to go.

Zoidberg: 'Aww. [He walks down the ship's steps.]

Cut to: PE Cockpit. Farnsworth sits in the driver seat, Fry, Leela, and Bender are gathered around Farnsworth, who scans the One Ring with something that looks like the Doom Meter from "Bender's Big Score", it beeps and it shows "Lotr Rama".

Farnsworth: 'According to my Universal Origin Detector this One Ring is from the Lotr Rama universe. [He presses a button and a key board comes out from the ship's controls the wheel, with a tiny blue screen attached to the top of the keyboard, Farnsworth then types in “Lotr Rama” and presses ctrl then U.

Bender: 'Nothing's happening.

Farnsworth: 'Wait for it.

Cut to: Hanger. The PE Ship disappears with a blinding flash of light.

Scene: The Shire. The PE Ship appears above the village Hobbiton with a blinding flash of light. The Hobbots run into their home screaming and some of them shouting "Dragon".  

Cut to: PE Ship Cockpit.

Bender: 'Ha ha ha ha ha! Look at them run!

Leela: 'We need to go east. Bender, you placed the package in the Cargo Bay?

Bender: 'Yep.

Leela: 'Good work.

Cut to: Outside. The PE Ship flies eastwards across the Shire. As it flies over the Shire, many Hobbits flee in terror, some however stare in disbelief pointing at it.

Cut to: Bree. Humans and Hobbits gasp in the streets pointing at the PE Ship flying over them.

Cut to: Rivendale. The PE ship flies over Rivendale, the Elves stare in disbelief.

Cut to: The Misty Mountains. Trolls and Giants stare in disbelief at the PE Ship flying over them. On the top of a mountain The Lord Of Fire And Shadow (The Balrog: Durin's Bane) sees the PE Ship. Durin's Bane roars, then takes off using it's wings and starts chasing after it.

[The PE Ship increases in speed dramatically and within seconds is out of sight. Durin's Bane waves it's hand, then flies back onto the mountain.]

Cut to: Minas Tirith. The PE Ship flies over Minas Tirith, People gasp and point at the PE Ship which flies towards Mordor.

Cut to: Minas Morgul. The PE Ship fries a few lasers at Minas Morgul. Nazguls come out of Minas Morgul, and the PE Ship kills them easily with it's lasers. The PE ship then flies over Minas Morgul, Orks fire arrows at the PE Ship, which bounce off it.

Cut to: Cockpit.

Fry: 'Ha ha, take that evil Orcs!

Cut to: Cirith Ungol. The PE Ship fires a few laser at it blowing the tower up.

Cut to: Mordor. The Eye of Sauron a top the tower of Barad-dûr looks at the PE Ship.

Cut to: Cockpit. Farnsworth has his hand over his eyes trying to block out Sauron's gaze.

Farnsworth: 'I can't see! [Fry and Bender scream.]

Fry and Bender: 'We're gonna die!

Leela: (shouting) 'Gimme the wheel! [Leela pushes Farnsworth off the seat.]

Farnsworth: 'Hey?!

Cut to: Outside. At the last moment Leela pulls the PE Ship up, then flies towards Mount Doom, a sign on the ground reads "Mount Boned" pointing towards Mount Doom.

Cut to: Cargo Bay. Gollum opens the box and takes the One Ring out.

Gollum: 'My precious. [The floor opens underneath him and he falls into the lava of Mount Boned.]

Cut to: Cockpit. They all cheer.

Farnsworth: 'Now let's go home. [He presses home on the keyboard, and they and the ship itself disappear with a blinding flash of light. The eye of Sauron begins to scream and the of tower Barad-dûr begins to fall.

Cut to: Planet Express: Hanger. Fry, Leela, Bender, and Farnsworth walks down the steps of the PE ship.

The End