Fan Fiction

The End of Futurama
By Robert Stewart

“Good news everyone!”

“What is it this time Professor?” Amy asked.

“Bender you have won a chance to experience the ultimate in retirement! This came in the mail addressed to the owner of Bender. So I opened it and this is a lovely surprise.”

“Wait a sec!” Fry interjected. “They used to have these same scams back when. And how can Bender retire when he has an owner?”

“Easy, I’ll just give him all that time off. Besides I am not getting any younger. I’d love to see all of you guys taken care of, especially if my cyborg body isn’t ready. Well then I am ready to go see my maker. Bender I’ve met yours. He was a nice chap, why he gave me some lovely tea.”

That’s all well and good, Professor but Bender loves us! Why would he ever wish to leave? We love him better than anyone else could.” Amy cooed.

“Sorry little missee, I got to go check this out. Look out retirement, here I come. Hey, what is retirement?”

“Bender, if you don’t know what retirement is then you are not going to this place alone. Professor is there anything about qualifications, visiting or anything of that nature?” This was from Leela.

“Why yes it does. It says here that you’ll get this retirement if you can do one thing for the planet. Wow maybe Bender has to save a planet?”

“No way Jack! Hit the road with that mess.”

“Anyhoo, if Bender can do the one thing that he is capable of, then he’ll get his retirement. And wow look at this retirement package. He gets the use of the entire planet. All of the resources of the planet is for his use. Even if they don’t have it already they must build whatever he wants. Gyms, swimming pools, casinos, theaters, whatever he wants.”

“Whoo hoo!” Bender yelled. Then he started singing I’m in the money.

“Shut up, Bender!” Leela commanded. “Well if a planet can afford all of that then it can afford to feed all of us. I’m not going to let Bender go down to this so called retirement planet alone. So gang it looks like we are all going to this place. To the ship!”

Amy thought to herself that she ought to invite all of Bender’s special friends, so she sent off a hyper wave signal to his off planet buddies before she joined in the rush.

“To the ship “ was echoed by Bender and Amy as they crowded upon the ship gangplank. Amy wanted to be sure she would get to put in a word to Bender. Why think of the malls he could order the planet to build. She was thinking.

Fry also wanted to talk to Bender he was thinking that a full Italian pizzeria would make a great place to hangout. Zoidberg wanted a hospital built. He reasoned within himself. Why just think of the research we could accomplish. We might even think of a way for Bender to be fully human and live forever. Of course said hospital would have a cafeteria, and that cafeteria will throw away some food. He stopped on the gangplank and started daydreaming about all of that delicious garbage.

Then the Professor startled him as he shuffled past. “Bender I will protect you. I’d like to see a planet fool me. Then to Leela he said, ”Let’s blow this foolish planet.”

Later after traveling through space, in the Control room Leela in the pilot chair, pointed to the front view screen. “There’s your planet Bender.”

“Whoo-hoo! What kind of place is it?”

Fry was at the scanning station. By this time he could work these controls very well. He was adjusting to this time. Better than he knew himself. He wanted to pilot a ship, but these science controls were actually harder to do. And because no one really noticed him doing it, he had had time to filter out his mistakes and now he was a top notch ship’s science officer in charge of probing planets and whatever else the PE crew ran up on while out in space. “It is mostly a pastoral planet. But, boy do they generate power. This planet generates enough power to run fifty of our home planet. But it looks safe enough to go down for a visit, Leela.”

“Okay we’re landing brace yourself people.”

Outside the ship after everyone had disembarked they gawked at the sight of the planet, and what they could see of the inhabitants. It was full of robots. They were all busy going about their daily chores.

Leela said, “Looks like robots are working to me. Some retirement place.”

“ON the contrary Miss…?”


“Miss Leela.” Said an urbane looking man as he approached them. “I am the head of Ex- President Obama. And I welcome you to my planet. I know you are wondering if I am really the head of Obama because I don’t look it. Well you see this is the sort of advancement we have made on this planet. We look at a problem and come up with a solution. See I have a cybernetic robot so my body is humanoid that supports a force field that surrounds my head and the liquid solution is clear. So I tend to look better than Nixon’s head that you know about. Is one of you guys Bender?”

“I am.”

“Why of course you are.”

Leela said with a lot of indignation. “And we are here to see that Bender doesn’t get… get… What’s the word Fry?”


“Yes scammed!

“Ma’am, I am not here to scam anyone. If Bender can do the one thing that I ask him to do, then he gets the retirement of his dreams. He can enjoy my planet’s hospitality for a week or even a month to ascertain my willingness to give him what I promised him.”

Amy had already liked this man so she said. “Awww Leela clearly this man means what he says. Fry pointed out to me some lovely shops to go shopping in. Why this planet is the exclusive carrier of the FUBU line of clothes. I don’t know what it is but it sounds heavenly. C’mon go shopping with me. “Fry wouldn’t you just love to watch me and Leela try on outfits that show off our figures. We’ll start at the bikini swimwear shop first, okay?”

Fry’s tongue hung out as he pictured Amy and Leela in swimsuits. He was hoping that he could cajole them into trying on some string one pieces. He found one pieces sexier than bikinis. However his jaw snapped closed and a frown came upon his face as the professor chimed in.

“Yeah why don’t you girls go shopping while us real men look over the proposal that Obama has made. Don’t forget to pick me up a thong also; Amy you know my thong size, it is a one.”

Fry then looked sick as the mental picture of the Professor in a thong came upon him. His want to be soul mate, Leela also had the same mental picture. “Yeeeeeuck!” came from Leela.

Dr. Zoidberg still wanted to talk to Bender about his research hospital idea. So he also chimed in on the Professor’s words. “ Yeah, that’s right. Fry you go ahead why if it was mating season I’d be going along also. But I’ve got food on my mind. Mr. Obama is there a place where we could get some lunch, perhaps?”

“Sure, I’ve got just the kind of place for Bender and you guys to go to. It is a gentleman’s club that serves a baaaad steak. You know, one that has the chef put his foot in it. Wine and cigars are also served as well.”

“Whoo hoo!”

Fry, Amy and Leela were inside a shop trying on swimsuits that were from the FUBU label. In case you are not familiar with this label one thing that distinguishes this label is the use of bright colors and prints. Fry had convinced the girls to try on one piece outfits. Leela had on one outfit that was very stunning. It was a string one piece. The top was halter in form. The neck strap was purple string that got progressively wider.. As it flowed into the bra cups the color devolved into red and blue. Those cups in turn evolved back into the color purple, as the strap went into the a string bottom. It didn’t hurt that she had purple high heels to lengthen her leg line either. When she turned around the fact that the halter top was the same color as her hair and under her hair, and the string came up from the crotch ,it looked like she was naked from behind. The name of this suit was “The Color Purple”.

Amy had on a tiger print one piece. The suit had a full top with no straps, the one piece that went down to her hips went down in an ever increasingly slimmer string that went from the right breast over the right hip. Then between Amy’s legs and went back up to the right breast.

Fry needless to say was watching with great interest to the girls as they adjusted the suits over their frames. The different suits with their bold colors, and bold prints were having a great effect on him. The clerk was also very pleasant to him. He found that her voice was very soothing to his ears. He had asked her if she could sing and she started in on a song. Her voice was so clear and bright it was very good to his ears. She walked away from them a few steps. Fry had a wineglass in his hand, when suddenly she hit a note and the glass broke. She said I used to do that on a commercial back in the day. Obama wants us to practice our talents a lot to make sure we are ready.

Amy asked. “Ready for what?”

The woman replied. “For you guys obviously young lady. By the way my name is Ella, Ella Fitzgerald.”

They then paid for their purchases and made their way into another shop that sold the FUBU line of clothes. This store was for men. So the girls helped Fry to pick out outfits. They ended up with Fry in a white shirt that had on the back the map of the old United States of America. Fry didn’t understand the shirt as it had some weird geography on it, that he didn’t remember from his time. For example where New York was supposed to be it had Brooklyn, the home of hip hop. Then down where D. C. was supposed to be it had Chocolate city. Over in the west instead of just California, it had California Dreamin’ , and L.A. was called Gangster Paradise. The pants were bright red with vivid green pockets in back and the front pockets and the cuffs were lined in the same color green. On the left rear pocket was in black a map of Africa and on the right one a map of USA. In between was in black outline a clipper sailing ship. Also down the side in black outline were some chains and shackles. He had on his feet, Stacy Adams styled shoes that were red and green. On his head was a Kangol style hat that was white.

The salesman was very reassuring. He said to Fry. ‘My son you are wearing the epitome of style. This shows that life is indeed a circle. Nothing can keep you down. Feel the power that these symbols on your clothes represent. This outfit says, indeed it shouts to the world that you will not run away. It shouts , I’s here! I’s here! I’s here! I’s here!” And as he shouted out the last words he beat his chest and turned to the four directions with each shout of I’s here.

Fry felt a stirring deep within himself with the salesman words. He stood erect and powerful. The girls felt it because they came close to him and hugged him. So Fry had to ask, “what is your name sir?”

“I am your Fath…no I’m sorry. My name is James Earl Jones.”

They paid for their purchases and once again went shopping. Ella and James had joined them in their shopping. All the other clerks were robots. A good time was being had by all, and meanwhile back to Bender.

Bender and the Professor and Dr. Zoidberg had just polished off a fine meal of salad, steak, baked potato, braised carrots. Dr. Zoidberg of course had lobster and shrimp as added entrees. Wine with the meal and now each had a snifter of Brandy and a cigar.They were served by robots. “ I stopped smoking after finishing my two terms of my Presidency. But as a congratulatory note I smoked one of these, at the end of my second term. And now this is all I smoke, and only on great occasions, eminent occasions. Obama was explaining to the group. “I thank you Doctor for cutting the ends off the cigars for us. Those claws are mighty handy I bet.”

“Why thank you sir.”

Obama had already explained to them that that is all the honorific he is entitled to. In fact you didn’t even have to say Ex-President. And the serving robots were being especially nice to Bender. “Hey fellas, after you finish here Bender there is someone I’d like you to meet.”

So the all male group sauntered over to a laboratory, that made the Professor actually drool. Inside was another although it was a cruder model cyborg like the President, Ella Fitzgerald, and James Earl Jones. “Gentlemen I’d like to present Dr. George Washington Carver.”

After shaking hands with all of them Dr. Carver said. “This is my time for some scheduled tests, may I use Mr. Bender for a while?”

Obama asked.” Bender, would you mind bending this small piece of pipe?”


“It needs to be fixed exactly like these toothpicks.” Said Mr. Carver holding up a long series of toothpicks held together with modeling clay in a complicated Gordian knot of twists and turns .

“Piece of cake.” Bender proceeded to bend the pipe that was 1 inch in diameter. His eyes went back into his head, since he had extended them out so he could get all the dimensions and tiny twists and turns correct. His arms were a blur as they moved with terpsichordian precision “Here you go, Pops.”

Mr. Carver said, ”I’ll tell you later after I run some tests.”

And with that the men continued on a tour of the planet. As they meandered through the city, Dr. Zoidburg asked whether there was any marine life on the planet. Actually he really wanted to know if the planet only consisted of automated shopping malls.

“Sir, I would have you to know that this planet in many ways is better than earth is. We found a class M planet, and the only difference was the level of life. When we got here this planet was still developing and was roughly in the Mesozoic period. I instructed the robots with Dr. Carver’s help to factor in the different environmental factors. By the way let me tell you that is a headache in itself. We started bulldozing an acreage that we used as a yeast starter so to speak to put in plants from the 20th century. I being an ex president did have some access to the old Jefferson plantation. Monticello was very helpful in getting us pure species of plants. We then used the various zoos, with the Columbus , OH zoo being the most helpful. I once had Jack Hanna over to the White House and his offspring was very helpful in giving us animals to have. So we have a African continent and an Asia continent. We have a North American continent. Since this planet only has three continents we sort of split animals from South America and Australia up into the African and Asian continents with those animals native to those continents. We keep those has our hunting and farming and mining continents. And use this continent as our industrial and city life.”

“Wonderful, wonderful, very remarkable!” Dr. Zoidburg gushed.

“Impressive indeed, sir. Professor chimed in. “Apparently this Dr. Carver is some kind of expert, I presume?”

“Yes he is.” Obama continued, “he is the great Dr. George Washington Carver of Tuskegee Institute. He is very famous person that people usually look up, during the month of February. His expertise was just invaluable in our transformation of this planet.”

“Oh well if he is only famous during one month he may have some more studying to do before he locks his intellectual horns with the likes of me.” Said the Professor condescendingly.

“Riiiiiight.” Said Obama in a very dry voice. He then took out a pad and after tapping on the touch screen a few times he then said. “Fry and the ladies will be joining us soon. They actually have accomplished their shopping and also has had a light lunch. When they come up in the Lambo-Rolls copter we will do a little sightseeing on the African continent. The Asian continent is the biggest and it covers most of the other hemisphere. Our oceans are between the three continents. They are the Michelle, the Sarah, and the Ella. And here they come now.”

The men piled into the sleek helicopter. They got into the front half of the spacious passenger compartment. In the back half was Fry and Leela and Amy. The girls were dressed in matching sun dresses. And Fry was in his new clothes. They were the picture of perfection.

Obama pushed a control to open a speaker circuit to the pilot. “Pilot I’d like to do the thing.”

“Roger that sir!” was the response.

When the crew got back to their hotel and had dinner and seen some televised entertainment. Fry asked Bender if he was comfortable in his luxurious bed. “Sure.” Was the response. “What about you?”

“I am but I’m worried.”

“What about?”

“What exactly do you need to do. Aren’t you worried about it?”

“Nah, it can’t be anymore nuttier than anything the Professor has me to do. Anyhow we’ll see in the morning. Good night, sleep tight, the little Benders may bite; especially if there is no alcohol!

Obama met the crew after their breakfast of fruit salad and coffee with various pastries. Only Zoidburg had had a humongous omelets added. It consisted of 6 eggs stuffed with tomatoes, three kinds of olives, Italian sausage, two kinds of mushrooms, anchovies, stoplight peppers, jalapeño peppers, chicken and steak chopped finely, and four different kinds of cheeses.

“Bender, Dr. Carver has performed the most meticulous measurements on the prototype that you bent for us yesterday. And he is satisfied that you will be able to do the necessary bending of the pipe components to the proper specifications.” Seeing the blank looks on Fry and Bender’s faces he added, “In other words the project is a go.”

“Whoo hoo!” Went the duo of Bender and Fry as they gave each other high fives, and walking past each other backward low fives.

Leela then stated. “Are you then going to give him everything he wants during retirement?”

Yes, you guys have seen how I command this planet. As Bender starts the bending process which will take approximately 5 hours. I along with Dr. Carver and James Earl Jones and Ella Fitzgerald and will leave the planet. If the rest of the planet express crew will act as interim caretakers then Bender will be in complete and total charge of the planet as soon as he gets back. By the way we are aware that he has rocket capability so he is in complete charge and there is no way I or anyone else can con or scam him. I know that you are his friends and are only concerned that I may cheat him out of anything that I have promised. But I am not really a conventional politician. So I do mean exactly what I say. Okay everyone?

As Obama looked at each member of the crew in turn he got the varying yes responses from each one.

The professor then said to Bender, with a sniffle. “I herby give you this writ of manumission.” Then sobbing he fell into a hug around Bender’s neck. The girls then joined into the hug with tears of joy as well. Fry joined in after a moment’s hesitation. Dr. Zoidburg started to pour ink out at a tremendous rate and with prodigious amounts. Robots came from all directions and held up plastic to keep the rest of the party from becoming inkblots.

Obama then said. “All of the materials that are needed are being space lifted right now.Most of the material actually went before and last night. Leela can you accompany Bender inside to the control room so he can get the detailed instructions from Dr. Carver?”

“C’mon Bender.”

Later that morning after watching Bender lift off in a rocket to conserve his fuel for his reentry. Fry and Amy entered the control room where Leela was monitoring the proceedings. The Professor and Johnwent into Dr. Carver’s lab so they could do some experimenting of their own. Amy asked Leela how was everything coming.

“Fine, but somehow I’m still worried.”

So was I as I told Bender last night before dropping off to sleep.” Fry then turned to Amy, “how did you sleep last night?”

In my Victoria’s Secret white teddy as usual when on a new planet.”

Leela interrupted the thoughts of Fry with, “ Well Bender is disembarking the rocket with his jet pack on, so he can start bending the equipment. I like the touch Obama had of providing everything for Bender so all he has to do his use his own stuff to get back down to us. You know he is a very reassuring man. I’ve never met anyone quite like him.”

“Me neither.” Fry concluded with, “I’ve never been more impressed with anyone before in my whole life. The other actual people here are equally impressive. But I did sense a great sadness in all of them.

“Uh oh. What are Obama and the rest doing now.” Said Amy pointing at the view screen.

“Oh they are going to start their operation as soon as Bender lands and radios them. That is the only way that they will be able to tell that he is done. Because if you’ll notice the apparatus winds around the two Jupiter sized planets in this system. From their position they won’t know anything until Bender tells them he is finished. Why are you worried?”

“No, not really, I guess. It’s just I…” Amy hesitated. Then she blurted out in a rush. “Well I’ve had a relationship once with a guy like Obama. My last year in high school. I was the head cheerleader on Mars and he was the star basketball player in Earth gee and the Mars gee leagues.“

“What does he look like him or what do you mean?” Asked Fry.

Actually he does look like a picture of Obama I found on the internet when Mr. Obama was younger and smoking a cigarette with a hat on. But what really got me was the demeanor that he shows. That is what is the same. And that is why I said uh oh.”


“Well… “ Amy hesitated then continued in a rush. “I was a year behind him in school and I knew intellectually that he would leave for college on the moon. After all the basketball players go there so they can get the experience before going pro. I also knew that he was very much in demand by other girls. So we did have an understanding. But when he did leave it was sort of perfunctory, you know what I mean. I mean he cried, I sure as heck did cry. But it also seemed like he was ready to move on you know. I just seem to have gotten the same vibe from Mr. Obama and the two others. They are ready to move on. To what I don’t know, that’s all.”

“Hey look there is a ship coming in.” Said Leela.

“I thought we ought to invite all of Bender’s friends,” said Amy.

And after the ship landed out bounded the Harlem Globetrotters. There was a little basketball showoff skills challenge as the Globetrotters headed for the obvious control room where the rest of the gang was located. Except for the Professor. He had gone to Dr. Carter’s laboratory because he wanted to snoop. He was looking in Dr. Carter’s notebook when he said. “Oh my!”

The Globetrotters had made it to the control room and had greeted Leela, and Fry, and Amy, and John. Meadowlark asked. “What’s happening, man?” To Fry, who proceeded to tell him all the things that He, Amy, and his beloved Leela were discussing when they were landing. Then fry continued with this.

“Yeah Ella mentioned that she had to be ready. I wonder what she has to be ready for?” Fry mused.

“Uh OH!” Amy went a lot louder and more intense than before. “Now I see.”

“See what Amy?” Leela asked.

“Do you remember that moment when that Lady Ella Fitzgerald broke the glass in Fry’s hand? Then she said she had to stay in practice for us? Don’t you see?”

“See what Amy? Of course you can’t see sound waves and it is sound waves that made the glass in Fry’s hand shatter. You have a PhD. So don’t you know all about this. Or did you spend more time cheerleading and chasing boys?” Leela replied sarcastically.

“When you are a cheerleader you must maintain a high GPA. And it is lucky for you that I’ve gone out with a lot of different boys. I’ve been exposed to a lot of different cultures. And it was the same black boyfriend that took me to his older Uncle’s bachelor pad. And he had his speakers sitting on top of beer bottles.”

“Aaaaand that makes sense in this situation because…?”

“Because he did that so the sound would be richer, and it would have a more powerful bass line. The way that Bender is bending the pipe around these planets it is so Mr. Obama can harness the gas giants potential energy. Mr. Obama and Dr. Carver is going to use the planets as an amplifier. Gas giants are essentially liquid for sound waves. And that liquid is spinning at a constant rate. If a vibration wave is added in it, then that wave will be carried through to the whole planet. Then it would come back out as an amplified wave. Then that wave would be compressed back by the pipes going away, to make it more intense. Whenever it comes back out it will have a lot of power.”

“Jeepers!” Fry exclaimed. “ And my buddy Bender is causing all of this. Wow this must be the best sound system ever. I wonder why Mr. Obama is building it? Why he must be trying to bring back the Jackson 5!” Then he went into a series of Michael Jackson smooth Criminal moves.

“Quit showing off Fry.”Leela lovingly chided him.

“Yeah quit it Fry! Besides I had drinks with Mr. Obama and he doesn’t like Michael Jackson. He was into Public Enemy, KRS1, Eric B & Rakim, Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five and of course the NWA.” Said Amy.

“Yeah quit it Fry! Besides I had drinks with Mr. Obama last night and he doesn’t like Michael Jackson. He was into Public Enemy, KRS1, Eric B & Rakim, Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five and of course the NWA.” Said Amy.

“Awww, Amy obviously he likes a lot of different types of music. I actually do know who Ella Fitzgerald is. She was the best singer of her day and maybe of all time. Her nickname was the First Lady of Song, and she was rumored that she could use her voice to tune instruments even the piano.” Leela said.

In walked the Professor. “Hey look at what I found. Dr. Carver’s notes, maybe I can use some of this as a starter for some ideas from me.”

“Let me see those!” Something is nagging at me that Amy said.” Bubblegum Tate says.

Grabbing the notes he started looking them over while making various noises indicating deep thought and concentration. Finally he looked up with a little crestfallen look but a look of triumph as well as utter disbelief.

“What is it, sir?”

“Thank you for calling me sir. And because of that you deserve an explanation, and I am also in a quandary about what to do. Maybe you can help me make a decision.”

“Amy’s explanation of a harmonic wave was crude but essentially correct. And what Mr. Obama is doing is trying to end the Universe. I know it sounds crazy.” He said looking at their expressions surrounding him. But he continued explaining because he felt the importance of what Mr. Obama was trying to do and he understood the reasons. He wasn’t sure if he agreed, but he wasn’t sure that he disagreed either.

Continuing he said. “The latest string theory has everything in the Universe made up of six strings. And these string vibrate or oscillate at a rate that being different means that it can make up various matter. Fry back in your time they had string theory as M-theory with Stephen Hawking as its champion. Now there is V-theory as it has evolved through time. Savvy? Obama is trying to End all of Futurerama using Ella’s pure voice and James’s powerful voice amplified by the apparatus that Bender is shaping.

He has this complicated notes for them to sing

see foot note at end And this is some of the mathematics Planck velocities, Sheldon Glashow’s work; AdS7 × S4is equivalent to the so-called (2,0)-theory in six dimensions.” He held out Dr. Carver’s notes for them to peruse.

“So if I understand you correctly that man and his buddies wishes to destroy all life?” Leela asked incredulously.

“Exactly and because I understand his frustration being a minority there in lies my quandary.” And he looking at her expression understood her for not understanding. And loving her for her humanity he explained gently. “Leela honey remember when you told me the story of how you met Fry?”

At her nod he continued. “Well when he had that question that he asked about your eye even after you asked him not to. Remember how you sighed? That feeling of despair and resignation that you had at that moment does get old after awhile. And you fantasize about getting everyone that ever sold you short and gave you that feeling that you had at that moment that Fry or anyone else has given you over your eye. Obviously Mr. Obama and Dr. Carver and James and Ella has had this feeling for too long and now wish to end it all. Sort of suiciding and taking everyone with them.

“That explains it and the rap music, he’s gotten a little bit militant.” Said Bubblegum Tate, “but I’m kinda sympathetic to his cause. Leela and Amy you are both minorities, what do you think? Will humanity ever change? Is there any hope?” As he said this he broke down and started crying.

Both of the girls went over to him and started trying to give him comfort. They then reached out to the others of the team for mutual support and comfort. Everyone was choked up with the deep emotion expressed by everybody. The feeling of sadness for all of humanity. The personal feelings of grief whenever anyone had ever tried to get over on them or do them a wrong. The sadness when you realize that you have done someone else an injustice. The frustrated feeling that you get when you see someone else suffer at the hand of another. These memories were in their mind as they hugged.

The group hugged and wept for themselves and each other. The mood was very downtrodden as the feeling intensified. The down feeling was passed from heart to heart and from breast to breast. And then one of the globetrotters started to hum. He hummed a long note that was from down deep in his soul. He had no tune it was just that his heartbreak finally manifested itself in sound. And as he trailed off another started humming. His voice was not as deep and therefore his hum was at a little higher pitch.

Then another globetrooter started humming a signature tune. It was “Lean on Me” by Bill Withers. Suddenly Sweet Clyde broke out with the lyrics which goes like this:

Sometimes in our livesWe all have painWe all have sorrow

But if we are wiseWe know that there'sAlways tomorrow

Lean on me, when you're not strongAnd I'll be your friendI'll help you carry on

For it won't be longTill I'm gonna needSomebody to lean on

Please swallow your prideIf I have thingsYou need to borrow

For no one can fillThose of your needsThat you won't let show

You just call on me brotherWhen you need a handWe all need somebody to lean on

I just might have a problemThat you'll understandWe all need somebody to lean on

Lean on me, when you're not strongAnd I'll be your friendI'll help you carry on

For it won't be longTill I'm gonna needSomebody to lean on

You just call on me brotherWhen you need a handWe all need somebody to lean on

I just might have a problemThat you'll understandWe all need somebody to lean on

If there is a loadYou have to bearThat you can't carry

I'm right up the roadI'll share your loadIf you just call me

Call meIf you need a friend(Call me)Call me(Call me)If you need a friend(Call me)If you ever need a friend(Call me)

Call me(Call me)Call me(Call me)Call me(Call me)Call me(Call me)

If you need a friend(Call me)Call me(Call me)Call me(Call me)Call me(Call me)Call me(Call me)

As the last notes of the song died out suddenly Leela became energized. She told everybody to get up and stop feeling sorry for themselves. She then said. “We may die one day but it won’t be today!”

“What are we going to do?” Dr. John Zoidburg wailed.

Bubblegum Tate then as pumped up by Leela’s attitude as she was, said. “We are going to use the globetrotter style to flummox the plan. All we got to do is destroy the harmonic effect of the pipes.”

“Let’s get them,” shouted the Professor.

But no one moved until Leela gave the instructions. “We’ll divide up into two teams. Half of the globe4trotters with Amy and Zoidburg. The other half with me and the Professor. We’ll use some jetpacks and space suits that I saw in the equipment room behind this control room. Let’s move people!”

And then to the sounds of “Sweet Georgia Brown”, the famous Harlem Globetrotter song. And the PE crew and the Harlem globetrotters suited up and blasted off I the Globetrotters ship. Then they took basketballs one to each team and started doing fancy passes and dribbles on the tubes. Meanwhile Bender had finished and was blasting his way back down to earth.

“Oh no!”He shouted.

But he couldn’t blast his back up he didn’t have enough power so he landed with tears in his eyes because all he knew is that his retirement was in jeopardy. There was no one to console him when he landed and radioed to Obama that he was finished. So he decided to have fun while it would last. So with two female robots and a bottle of alcohol. He walked off towards a hotel.

As soon as they got the radio message from Bender. Dr. Carver gave the signal and Ella and James started singing. As Dr. Carver looked over his instruments he could tell something was wrong. He saw the notes go in perfectly but somehow they came out wrong and flat at the other side. Puzzled the foursome took off in a rocket to investigate. By this time the globetrotters and their extra players had landed. So Obama went down to confront them.

“Why was all he could ask. Why did you do this to us. We are tired of always explaining. We are tired of always having to prove ourselves. So Leela interrupted his babbling and told him point blank. “Everyone has to prove themselves.”

“I’m not talking about that, but after you have shown you are capable then having to prove yourself all over again to the same person again is tiring.” Obama said.

“Yeah I know. I go through it with this eye. But you have to keep trying. Things will get better. And they have. Sure we still got some of the same prejudices, but it will always be better and then…”

Bubblegum Tate interrupted. “Then your change will come. And the old spiritual blues song will have finally come true.”

So the PE crew was getting ready to come home. Amy and Leela was hugging Ella who said “You know I will wait forever if I have to. Because I know my change will come. And he needs my voice so even if he starts to feeling down again. Well I’ll just use my scatting abilities to pull him right back up. So ya’ll don’t worry none. We won’t try this again.”

Bender came out at that time and said. “ I’m bored. Forget retirement. Hey Fry let’s watch some old movies and drink.”

To which everyone cheered as they got ready to go home.


1. This is a hand-written musical notation by J. S. Bach: beginning of the Prelude from the Suite for Lute in G minor BWV 995 (transcription of Cello Suite No. 5, BWV 1011) BR Bruxelles II. 4805.