New Year 3004
Futurama created by Matt Groening. Developed by Matt Groening and David X.
Cohen. Owned by 20th Century Fox. Used without permission.
Summary: Leela goes to Times Square on New Year's Eve to celebrate alone, but
that is not how it ends up.
"This sort of reminds me of when I met Fry," thought Leela. "I
didn't have a date for New Year's then either."
It was the evening of December 31st, 3003. Leela was experiencing what was
once a common practice before she joined the Planet Express delivery company.
She was in Times Square of New New York City as a lonely single woman once more.
The annual office New Year's party finished early that day due to accountant Hermes
Conrad re-evaluating the profit that year, which was probably low, while the Professor
was working on some new invention in private...for a long time.
Leela had decided to go out by herself, for old times sake. Tension had been
rather high at work, so she had decided to get away from the others for the night,
but she was soon starting to feel lonely, although there were crowds of people
everywhere. Her co-workers, Amy, Fry, and Bender, were out with their own plans.
More accurately, Amy was with her boyfriend Kif, while Fry and Bender were doing
whatever guys do.
Leela was trying to blend in the partying crowd. Blending in never felt like
her strongest suit, due to her one eye and purple hair. But after several outings
with Fry and Bender during the past couple of years, she had felt like the world
was more accepting of her than she figured. Still, without them, she felt more
like an observer even when she was in a crowd.
She enjoyed herself as best she could. She listened to the music, danced some,
and tried to make out what was going on in the midst of all the confetti and balloons
around the street. She was surprised of how bored she felt. Now that she thought
of it, she never really enjoyed New Year's Eve before joining Planet Express;
the holiday was simply a distraction from her lonely life.
A short distance from her was Dick Clark's head's stage. She decided to go
to it, always wanting to see it up close. Her perception must have been unusually
off that evening, because by the time she got there, she noticed the familiar
back of a certain blond Democratic Order of Planets captain on the stage. She
thought of turning back, but she was lost in the crowd by then.
"And we're back with New Year's Rockin' Eve 3003!" announced Dick
Clark, as youthful as ever, to the camera and the audiences still at home. "And
here's my guest, straight from his battle with the Undecided Empire, Captain Zapp
Zapp, always enjoying attention, waved happily to the crowd. Leela was glad
that Zapp was facing the other side of the stage. If he saw her, he would remind
her of that embarrassing incident between them years ago. Well, embarrassing for
Zapp, still waving, happened to turn to Leela's side of the stand. Blending
in with the crowd no longer worked for Leela
"Well, well, well," said Zapp, proud as always, "the lady Leela!
You know, you stand out from the crowd."
Actually, Leela was trying to duck as he said that. Unfortunately, the crowd
had now dispersed, probably so that they and Zapp could get a closer look and
the woman he had pointed out.
"Why don't you come up here and share some titillating tales of our time
together, my pony-tailed vixen?"
"Um, I'd rather not," said Leela, now standing up. "I don't
think the network would allow it, anyway."
"I wouldn't let censorship get in the way of our dirty love," declared
Zapp, "I can pull some strings with the network. So, are you coming up or...?"
"I'd rather stay down here," said Leela, who was now defiantly standing
up. She decided that if she was going to be embarrassed planet-wide by Zapp, she
would at least take it with whatever dignity she had left, which she figured was
still a lot.
"Well, I'd come down to you," said Zapp, "but the camera needs
me. Besides, I like the view from here. So, how are things in your low-brow delivery
company and lazy crew?"
"Just fine," said a familiar voice from the crowd.
Leela turned in the direction of the voice and saw Fry and Bender.
"Leela's okay where she is," said Fry defiantly.
"What about her desperately looking for a ma...?" started Bender,
before Fry interrupted him by shouldering him in the gut...or would have if Bender
was not a metal robot.
"Ow! Well, anyway," said Fry as he rubbed his bruised shoulder,
"Leela's just fine where she is without some perverse guy foolishly waiting
for her to come back to him."
"What about her wanting chil...?" Bender started before Fry shouldered
him again, with the same painful result.
"Ouch! Anyway," explained Fry as he rubbed his shoulder again, "Leela's
okay and we're going to get drinks before the ball drops."
"We are?" asked Bender, sounding a little enthusiastic.
"Yes," answered Leela, "we are." She looked up to the
stage, smiling for what her friends had done for her that night.
"'Bye, Zapp," she said as she waved and left with her arms over
the shoulders of her friends.
As she left, she heard Zapp pleading.
"Leela! Wait! We could just skip to when we cuddled! No, wait, we didn't.
We could have a drive-thru marriage to make it wholesome. We can have a drive-thru
divorce afterward if you want! We can try commitment some other time!"
"So you don't mind us interruptin' your moment in the spotlight?"
asked Bender as they headed back to Times Square a couple of hours later.
"I feel a bit embarrassed for being rescued," said Leela, "but
I guess it would have turned out ugly for both Zapp and I if it weren't for you
two. How did you find me, anyway?"
"We spotted you in the crowd earlier and wanted to say 'hi'," explained
Fry, "but we lost you until Zapp pointed you out and we knew he'd embarrass
"Thanks guys," said Leela affectionately, now wishing she joined
them sooner. Being a dateless wonder was one thing. Being friendless was something
The ball was finally dropping and Fry and Bender chanted with the rest of
Leela decided to join in. Fry and Bender had that effect on her.
The ball stooped as lights declaring "3004" lit up.
"HAPPY NEW YEAR!"
It probably will be, thought Leela, it probably will.