Married With Children, part 4
Apartment 1I, 100 East 123rd Street, June 30, 3004, 0600 (6 a.m.)
Leela paced up and down the empty living room.
She was fully dressed, waiting for Brad, XT, and CosmicF to come and
move the last bits of furniture out of her apartment and into Fry and
her new apartment. She glanced at her Wristamajigy, confirming that
it was only fifteen seconds since she last looked at it. “Ooh!”
she thought, “Why does time move so slowly when you’re in
The buzzer rang, startling her for a second. She
called out, “I’m coming!” and opened the door.
Sure enough Brad, XT, and CosmicF were there. What she hadn’t
expected to see was Amy, Inez, and Chenxi. She blinked in surprise,
“Come on in!”
Inez was first through the door. She was
muttering to herself and appeared to be looking for something. Leela
gave Amy a “what gives” look. Amy just shrugged her
As Inez continued through the house, Leela turned
to Brad, XT and CosmicF. She smiled, “Thanks for coming on
time guys. This is going to be a crazy day.”
“Not half as crazy as Inez,” CosmicF
Amy and Chenxi both put their hands over their
mouths to muffle their giggles.
Brad turned to XT and CosmicF, “Come on
lads. We need to get this lot moved. We’ve all got other
things to do before the wedding.”
As he passed on
the way to the bedroom to help with the last bits of furniture XT
paused and smiled, “Leela, I wish you all the happiness in the
world. May Allah bless your marriage and your offspring to the
smiled her warmest smile, “Thank you XT.” She patted him
affectionately on the shoulder.
Before he moved off he said, “You are like
my sister…my family. Though life and unto death, we are
Leela felt a tear well up in her eye. As she
watched him walk into the bedroom, she realized what a good friend he
had become. He was steady, reliable, and resourceful. As she was
wiping away a tear, Inez wandered back into the room, still muttering
Inez announced, “The Feng Shui here is
“The what?” Leela asked.
Feng Shui, it mean wind and water in Mandarin. It how spirits flow
through a building. This place is the perfect apartment for my
little Amy if she gonna ever get that crazy green man to marry her.”
“Mom! It’s not Kiffie’s fault!”
Inez said something else in rapid fire Cantonese,
then resumed in English, “Your green squishy man gonna propose
soon. You need to accept. I not getting any younger, you know.”
“Mom, I’m not ready for kids.”
“Maybe you live near some normal people like
Fry and Leela, you change mind.”
turned red. Before she could say anything, Leela burst into
laughter, “That’s the first time I’ve ever heard
Fry and I called normal.” All four women laughed together.
Chenxi spoke up, “Maybe I can move into
Amy’s old place. It’s rent controlled, isn’t it?”
Amy nodded her head in reply, afraid that if she
spoke it would be the start of another argument with her
well-intentioned but highly opinionated mother.
Brad’s voice shouting, “Heave!”
caused the women to look toward the bedroom. There Brad and XT were
moving the bed, which they had turned on it’s side.
CosmicF was already struggling toward the front
door with an end table. Quick as a flash, Chenxi went to the door
and opened it. She smiled at CosmicF as he passed into the hallway,
following him out.
Brad and XT carried the bed out next. As he passed
Brad said, “Only the frame and a few odds and ends to go.”
Leela nodded, “Thanks!”
Amy had recovered her composure and looked at her
Wristamajigy, “Look at the time. I’ve got a gazillion
things to do before the wedding. Come on mom!”
Inez smiled, “Okay daughter, we can go now.
You move in here on 2 July, right after Freedom Day!”
Amy nearly shoved her mom out the door, “Fine
mom, fine. Let’s just get Chenxi and get going.”
Inez responded in Cantonese in a tone which said,
“Don’t try pushing me around, young lady.”
Leela said, “Thanks for coming!” Then
she looked at her Wristamajigy. “Goodness,” she thought,
“Amy was right, there’s a lot to do today!”
the Turanga Residence, June 30, 0730 (7:30 a.m.).
The living room was quiet and dark when Leela
entered. She looked around, pausing a moment to listen. A smile
flickered across her lips at the sound of her mother softly singing
in the kitchen.
Softly closing the
door, she padded softly to the kitchen doorway. Once there, she
stood gazing at her mother for a moment. Leela was a bit surprised
when her mother said without looking around, “Make yourself
useful, Morris instead of standing there gazing moonstruck at my
Leela gave a short laugh, “Okay mom, I’ll
help. I don’t know where dad is right now.”
Munda spun around, with an affectionate smile
lighting up her face, “You’re early sweetie. I was just
preparing some snacks for us. Kind of a light breakfast.”
“Thanks mom, I’m really hungry. I
just couldn’t stay in that empty apartment any more.”
“Well, don’t eat too much. You don’t
want to get bloated.”
Leela exclaimed with a giggle.
have heard your father on our wedding night. He sounded like the
New-New York Philharmonic wind section. He was nervous and he ate too
much.” Then Munda pantomimed someone blown up with gas.
Peals of laughter
from both women rang through the kitchen for a few minutes before
they regained their composure.
“Mom,” Leela said with a smile as she
shook her head, “you shouldn’t tell those kind of stories
“What kind of stories?” came Morris’
voice from the top of the stairs.
“Morris, come downstairs and greet your
daughter!” Munda called out, “She needs to eat some
breakfast before the wedding.”
“I’m coming! I just need to put my
Morris was giving Leela a big hug. He held her at arms length, “Look
at you. You look positively radiant.” He kissed her gently on
the forehead, “Fry is one lucky man.”
“I think I’m pretty lucky too, dad.”
Munda asked, “Morris, could you help me take
this into the living room? We can eat off of trays.”
“Sure.” Morris gave Leela a smile,
then went to help Munda with one of the trays heaped with food.
“Can I help?” Leela asked.
“Yes,” Munda replied, “by eating
your breakfast and enjoying your wedding day.”
They went into the living room. Morris and Munda
sat next to each other on their threadbare couch while Leela sat in
the armchair. With trays perched on their knees, they ate in
When they were all finished, Leela said, “Mom
that was really great. Thanks. It’s helped calm my jitters.”
“Uh oh,” Morris said, “sounds
like girl stuff coming up.” He stood and began to collect the
trays, “You ladies sit here and talk. I’ll do the
Morris. Don’t forget to rinse them well,” Munda said
“Right,” Morris said as he vanished
into the kitchen.
Munda and Leela sat in silence until the sound of
running water and clinking dishes emanated from the kitchen. Then
Leela asked, “Mom, were you nervous before your wedding?”
Munda was silent for a moment before answering.
When she answered, her voice was full of emotion, “Yes sweetie.
I was so nervous that I couldn’t eat all day. “
“What were you nervous about?”
was I nervous about?” Munda seemed lost in memories, “That
I’d trip going down the aisle…that everyone would think
my wedding dress was ugly…that I wouldn’t be able to
speak on the altar…that I wouldn’t please your father on
our wedding night…a million and one things. I kept
anticipating a disaster that never happened.”
“Really, mom? You worried about all that
Munda gave a laugh
as she remembered an incident from her wedding, so long ago.
“Leela,” she said with a smile, “the only thing
that happened out of the ordinary was when your cousin Ralph passed
out from drinking too much coffee.”
“Where did he pass out?”
“Right in the middle of the dance floor.
Plop! Like a stone!” Munda laughed again at the thought. “Poor
Ralph…he never could hold his coffee.”
Leela laughed at
the thought of her cousin Ralph, who she knew slightly, collapsing on
the dance floor.
“What about liquor?”
“Like a fish, that man could drink! The
stuff never bothered him, but coffee is another matter.”
briefly. Then a look of concern crossed her face as she thought,
“What if something goes wrong?”
Munda reached out to pat Leela on the knee, “Don’t
worry sweetie. This is going to be the best wedding ever held in the
Mutant Village…trust me.”
before she said fervently, “From your mouth to God’s
100 East 123rd Street, June 30, 3004, 0900 (9:00 a.m.).
Fry thought as he stepped back to survey the results of his work,
“this bedroom is really set up for a romantic wedding night!”
A dozen Altarian
Blue Roses each were arranged in two vases at the head of the bed.
Fry had placed scented candles at strategic locations around the
room. He’d even put new sheets and a bedspread on their
bed…all in soft pastels.
he mused, “that was definitely Amy’s idea.” Amy had
offered him a lot of advice on ‘what a woman wants’ in a
romantic setting. But he had added a few touches himself.
Fry had rigged
their stereo system to play some very romantic music…real
classics. He’d even gotten a full bag of rose petals to
scatter all over the living room and bedroom. Sight, sound, and smell
were all taken care of.
gotten Amy to promise to mind Nibbler for him. She was due to pick
him up in just a few minutes. He wanted no distractions.
Amy had laughed when he had said, “Can you
imagine Nibbler jumping on the bed when we are…well…you
know? What a mood killer.”
walking on sunshine, oh, oh!” Fry began to sing cheerfully as
he walked through the apartment, making sure that everything was
absolutely perfect. A series of guttural sounds caused Fry to look
down and see that Nibbler was following him.
Nibbler,” Fry said cheerfully. Nibbler responded by yapping
and growling as he jumped up and down. Fry bent over and picked him
up, “I bet you miss Leela, just like I do.”
Nibbler began to
purr as Fry scratched his belly. With a sudden note of solemnity Fry
said, “You know Nibbler, we are all one of a kind…Leela,
you, and me. Maybe that’s why we belong together.” He
shook his head, “Listen to me, I must be getting loopy from the
excitement. If anyone saw me talking to you, they’d think I
was losing it.”
He stroked Nibbler’s fur for a few minutes
before putting him down, “Well, it will be time to head down to
the church soon. I wonder where Amy is?”
As if in answer to
his question, the buzzer rang. “That will be Amy,”
Fry said. He was right. When the door opened, Amy stood there with
Inez and a tall, thin, middle-aged man in a pearl grey chauffeur’s
uniform. Fry was struck at once by the aura of calm that the man
seemed to give off.
“Amy, Inez, how nice to see you both!”
yeah,” Inez said dismissively, “we gonna take that
Nibbler off your hands for your wedding night. Where is he?”
Fry turned around and pointed to the kitchen,
where Nibbler was busily lapping water from a bowl.
Inez turned around to the chauffer, “Henry,
go get funny looking thing and take it to my apartment. Take good
care of it, OK?”
In a distinctly English accent, Henry replied,
Fry watched with interest as Henry went to pick
Amy glanced around the apartment, “Nice job,
Fry,” she said admiringly.
He shrugged, looking embarrassed, “Thanks, a
lot of this was your idea.”
distracted from their conversation when Nibbler gave a series of low
pitched guttural sound that meant he liked someone as Henry picked
“Nibbler really likes you,” Fry said
in a surprised tone.
“Yes, sir,” Henry replied, “I
find that most animals can read my love of all living things from a
take good care of him,” Amy interjected as she laid her hand
reassuringly on Fry’s arm, “I don’t mean to be
rude, but we really have to get going.”
Fry glanced at the clock on the wall and replied,
“Holy smokes! So do I! There’s no way I’m going
to be late today!”
Meeting Room, Church of the Alpha and the Omega, June 30, 3004, 1000
Amy came into the
meeting room with a look of grim determination on her face. This was
going to be a perfect wedding, or her name wasn’t Amy Wong!
softened a bit when she saw that Elzar himself was there, making the
catering preparations. Hearing her enter, Elzar glanced in her
direction, “Bam! I told you that I was going to make this a
first class affair for a third class price…and I meant it.”
“I believe you, Elzar.”
Scanning the room
minutely, Amy noted with some satisfaction that the decorations were
all in place just exactly as she had ordered them. If there was one
thing Amy liked, it was having her way. Still, she punched a few
keys on her Wristamajigy to summon Henry to have a look at the
At times Amy worried that she was going to grow
into her mother…a pushy, domineering, opinionated woman. Amy
smiled at the thought of what Chenxi had said earlier in the week,
“Your mother has suffered in so many ways, but never in
silence.” “How true that was,” she mused.
Satisfied that everything was on track, her
thoughts turned to Kif. She wondered if she would ever…could
ever…settle down. “If I do settle down,” she
thought, “it will be with Kif. He is the sweetest man in the
“How is our brood on Amphibios 9 doing?”
she wondered. Once she had told Kif how she often worried about
them. He had laughed softly, “Amy my love, they will be fine.
Out of any brood no more than 10 percent survive to adulthood. That
means in another 18 years, you’ll have four or five fully adult
She shook her
head. The thought of abandoning babies, even amphibians, to the
mercy of nature had seemed so wrong to her, but she trusted Kif
implicitly. What had surprised her was when the doctor had told her
she could become pregnant by Kif. That idea had taken some getting
Elzar interrupted her thoughts, “Do you want
spicy or mild slug fritters on the buffet?”
It took Amy a
moment to focus on Elzar’s question and give an answer, “Mild.
My dad gets terrible nightmarish diarrhea from spicy.”
The thought of the
billionaire Leo Wong in such a state apparently amused Elzar, for he
gave a short barking laugh. The withering look Amy gave him wiped
the smile from his face. Chastised, Elzar retreated back to
puttering around the long tables piled high with food.
Henry entered the room at that moment. In his
usual dignified yet deferential manner, he asked, “Does Madame
require my services?”
“Yes Henry.” She said with a smile,
for she genuinely liked him. “I’d like your opinion.
Have I over decorated?”
Henry swept the
room thoroughly with his eyes. After a short interval he replied,
“No Madame, everything is done to perfection.”
The smile of pleasure that flickered across Amy’s
face pleased Henry. He had known Amy since her birth. His attitude
to her was that of a bachelor uncle towards a favorite niece. Still,
he was only a servant, “Will that be all Madame?”
“Yes thank you, Henry.”
“Very good Madame,” he said before
withdrawing to the car to resume petting Nibbler.
Amy took one last look around. Everything was
going to go well. Now she needed to take the short walk to Morris
and Munda’s house where she would change into her Maid of Honor
“Who knows?” she thought, “Maybe
my next gown will be a wedding gown.” With that happy thought,
she strode out the door whistling softly.
Sanctuary, Church of the Alpha and the Omega, June 30, 3004, 1100
Everyone in the
wedding party had arrived. First to arrive was Fry, sporting a smile
that went from ear-to-ear. His enthusiasm made Rabbi Liebgott think
of that of a thoroughbred race horse at the starting gate.
LaBarbara had arrived next, with Dwight and Cubert in tow. The
Professor had straggled in muttering complaints, along with Bender
and Melissa. Amy and Kif had arrived shortly after, with Mr. Vogel on
their heels. He was holding Albert and Sally by the hand.
When he arrived, he announced, “I have to
get back out there to watch the other children.”
Rabbi Liebgott motioned with his hands, “So
bring the children in already! They could catch such a cold!”
Mr. Vogel nodded his assent vigorously. Then he
looked at Fry, “It was so nice of Leela and you to invite all
of the children.”
Fry smiled and shrugged, “It was the least
we could do.”
Sarah, Chelsea, and Caitlyn arrived and began to
set up their band equipment. The ushers, XT, CosmicF, Brad, James
and Zoidberg were the last to arrive. Rabbi Liebgott watched them
mill about for a moment before he said quietly, “Let’s
all please take a seat.”
They all took
seats, except for Amy, who continued pacing back and forth.
“Shpilkes,” Rabbi Liebgott thought. He smiled at
Amy, “So what’s with the pacing? Everything will turn
out just fine.”
Amy smiled back; for she had come to respect Rabbi
Liebgott in the short time she had known him. After all, not many
clergy of any type would descend into the sewers to perform a
“I’m Okay, Rabbi. Honestly, I’m
better off if I pace.”
Shrugging his shoulders, Rabbi Liebgott said
teasingly, “So, you’ll keep pacing during the ceremony?”
Amy stopped, “No.” Then she laughed,
“All right, I’ll sit down.”
Once Amy sat down,
the Rabbi ran through the wedding ceremony. He found that he couldn’t
help noticing something odd about James. While he was reminding them
of the vital part the ushers would play it hit him, “He’s
wearing some sort of theatrical makeup!”
Sarah and Zoidberg had done their best to help
James conceal his orange tinted skin, but their success was
incomplete. They had succeeded in making James look like was a
refugee from a berserk tanning bed.
“EXCELSIOR!” Bender bellowed causing
everyone to jump.
Rabbi Liebgott said, “Bender, you’ll remember to turn off
your voice box for the wedding?”
“Relax, meatbag.” Bender grumbled,
“I’ve got it under control.” With that said Bender
reached into his chest cavity and flicked a switch. He was now
silent until after the ceremony.
Fry touched Bender’s shoulder, “Thanks,
“Who has the rings?” Rabbi Liebgott
Fry reached into his pocket. “Here they are
Rabbi,” he said as he fished the two boxes out.
Rabbi Liebgott took them in his hand. Then he
walked over to Albert. He knelt down on one knee before him and said
in a solemn voice as he looked him in the eye, “Your name is
Albert isn’t it?”
“Albert, as the ring bearer, you must guard
these rings very carefully. Can you do that?”
The sound of Albert’s “gulp”
seemed to echo through the Sanctuary. His voice quavered slightly as
he replied, “Yes sir.”
With a reassuring smile, Rabbi Liebgott handed the
rings to Albert. He reached out and patted his cheek before standing
The band began to
tune their instruments as Rabbi Liebgott resumed his place in front
of everyone. He held his hand up said in a solemn tone, “May
the Lord bless you and keep you. Now you all know what you are
supposed to do. Let’s make this a wedding that everyone will
Sacristy, Church of the Alpha and the Omega, June 30, 3004, 1145
Peeking out from
the Sacristy, Fry could see that the church was rapidly filling up.
Morris and Munda were not there yet…but Munda would come in
just before Leela anyway. Morris would walk Leela down the aisle…just
“Gosh,” Fry thought, “rehearsal
seems like a million years ago.”
He noted with some satisfaction that most of the
inhabitants of the Mutant Village were already there on both sides of
the aisle. Leela and he had agreed that there would be no bride or
groom’s side. Everyone would be seated together…regardless
of genetic heritage.
A smile crossed
Fry’s face as he saw his attorney, Joseph Kershaw enter the
church dressed in a conservative suit and red bow tie, as always.
Judy entered on the arm of Brad. Behind them came her fiancé.
“What was his name…Lip?” Fry wondered before the
sound of Hermes tuning up the church organ brought him back to the
Ducking back into the Sacristy, Fry could not keep
from dancing with sheer joy. He began to dance, play air guitar and
sing, “I’m walking on sunshine, oh, oh!” He stopped
at the sound of applause. Embarrassed, he wheeled to see a smiling
Rabbi Liebgott standing there.
“Hello Rabbi.” He said in a tone of
done hundreds of weddings. But never have I seen a groom dance with
joy before the wedding.”
Consulting his watch, Fry felt his heart begin to
pump faster. Only two more minutes until he and the Rabbi would go
out into the Sanctuary to await his bride!
Rabbi Liebgott touched Fry on his forearm, “Are
you ready to go?”
“Ready…heck no! I’m eager, I’m
“Then let’s go.”
They strode into
the Sanctuary and onto the Altar. Fry took his place on the Rabbi’s
Then the procession from the back of the church
began. Munda entered, wearing a plain, but hardly patched blue
dress. By mutant tradition, only the bride was permitted an
unpatched dress at a wedding.
Bender and Amy, the Professor and Melissa, and Kif
and LaBarbara, each took their turn coming down the aisle. Bender
wore a bow tie and monocle. The groomsmen wore pearl grey tuxedos
that were a counterpoint to the light blue gowns worn by the ladies.
Once all the
bridesmaids and groomsmen were assembled, Fry stole a look at his
watch. Only two minutes to go. He gave the biggest smile he had ever
given in his life. It was such a smile that everyone in the church
remarked that they had never seen a happier looking groom.
Seated next to “Lip” Lipford and Judy,
Kershaw had leaned over and said in a low voice, “That boy is
grinning like a raccoon eating fish guts out of a wire brush.”
Lip snorted to suppress a laugh. Without moving
her head, Judy’s eyestalks swiveled to glare at both Lip and
Kershaw. That effectively silenced them.
“Men!” she thought with a mild feeling
Hermes began playing a version of a Haydn minuet
when little Albert began to solemnly walk down the aisle, bearing the
rings. He walked with the deliberation of a soldier going through a
minefield. When he reached the Altar, he took his place beside
Bender. Fry could see the sheen of nervous perspiration on the
little guy’s face.
Albert looked at Fry, who gave him a wink and a
‘thumbs up’ sign. It pleased Fry to see Albert relax a
Next came Sally, whose face mirrored the joy that
Fry felt. She smiled at everyone as she strew rose petals the entire
length of the aisle. She took her place at Amy’s side, smiling
The doors to the
Sanctuary opened once again. The sound of “Here Comes the
Bride” rang through the Sanctuary.
Rabbi Liebgott said in a low voice, “Okay
everyone. It’s Showtime!”
Sanctuary, Church of the Alpha and the Omega, June 30, 3004, 1200
Morris glanced at
his daughter as Sally went through the door into the Sanctuary.
Leela’s face was hard to see beneath the veil, but even so she
radiated a happiness that made Morris’ heart glow. “My
little girl is getting married,” he thought, “and to a
surface dweller! Who’d of thought it?”
Aware that her
father was looking at her, Leela whispered, “Don’t get
too emotional on me dad or I’ll never make it through the
“Dad, has Sally made it to the Altar yet?”
“No. Just a
few more seconds. OK, she’s there. Let’s go.”
They both stepped off together to make the long
trip down the aisle.
The crowd, which had risen to its feet at the
first notes of the Wedding March, gave a collective murmur of
admiration as they saw Leela. Clad from head to foot in pristine
white, she looked every inch a bride.
Her tiara and veil
combination were perfectly adjusted. While not entirely obscuring her
features, the veil lent the perfect air of mystery and anticipation
to the moment. She managed her long silk dress perfectly as she came
done the aisle on her father’s arm.
“Careful,” she though to herself,
“don’t trip. Don’t hurry. Smile for everyone.
Don’t get nervous.”
voice seemed to echo in her head, “Don’t look at the
Altar until you get there. That’s what causes most brides to
panic, so just look at the crowd or the aisle about ten feet in front
of you. Whatever you do, don’t look at the Altar until you get
Leela surveyed the
crowd packing the church. It seemed as though the entire Mutant
Village was there, along with everyone she and Fry had invited from
the surface. She was pleased to see them all.
brides, Leela did not have to fight a sudden impulse to speed up her
pace. This was her moment, one she would never have again.
She was the bride, the absolute center of attention, and the envy of
every woman there.
The thought crossed her mind that she had married
Fry once before, during their misadventures with the time skips.
“That doesn’t count,” she thought, “I don’t
even remember most of it.”
On the other hand,
she knew that she would remember these moments for the rest of
her life. Smiling, she basked in the glow of love and positive
emotion that seemed to radiate from the crowd. “Yes,”
she murmured softly, “this really is my day.”
Standing on the
Altar, Fry was awestruck by Leela’s appearance. At the first
sight of her, his smile brightened. As she approached the Altar,
Fry’s heart felt as though it was going to leap out of his
chest. For the first time the realization struck him with full
force; she was really going to marry him after all!
Rabbi Liebgott had
been keeping a close eye on Fry. When he saw Fry begin to tremble as
Leela approached, he touched Fry’s elbow and whispered, “Easy
Philip, you don’t want to spoil the moment for her by
attracting attention to yourself. This is her time.”
The sound of the
Rabbi’s voice calmed Fry instantly. It did not wipe the
ear-to-ear grin from Fry’s face, however.
Now Leela could
see her mother, standing in the front row. Munda was smiling sweetly
as she dabbed at her eye with a handkerchief. Leela longed to rush
over and embrace her mother, but she knew that her mother’s
tears were tears of joy.
A few steps more
and Leela caught sight of the wedding party on the Altar. She almost
froze in her tracks when she saw Fry’s wide grin. “That
grin,” she thought, “It drives me crazy!” Leela
made a mental note to really eat him alive tonight.
Now she stood at
the foot of the Altar, ready to ascend. “Only three small
steps, Leela” she said to herself softly. With her father’s
assistance, she ascended the steps. Her father whispered, “Take
your place, honey. I love you.”
Leela took her
place on Rabbi Liebgott’s left, glancing over at Fry. She
couldn’t help but smile at the sight of a man who was obviously
so happy. The last strains of the Wedding March fell silent. Rabbi
Liebgott motioned to everyone to be seated. He whispered, “Ready?”
Both Fry and Leela nodded.
“Good. Let’s begin.”
Sanctuary, Church of the Alpha and the Omega, June 30, 3004, 1205
smiled as he cast his voice out into the crowd, “"Dearly
beloved, we are gathered here in the sight of God, and in the
presence of this company, to unite Fry and Leela in holy matrimony.
Marriage was ordained by God and is declared to be honorable among
all men. On this occasion we begin by asking God's blessing on this
marriage service. Let us pray."
Everyone bowed their head for the prayer and
closed their eyes. Unfortunately, when Albert bowed his head, one of
the rings rolled off the cushion in his hands. It rolled beneath the
seats before it came to rest squarely between the unsuspecting
Rebecca Robotowitz’ feet.
Albert was in a panic. What should he do? Before
he could do anything, Bender came to the rescue. He stealthily
popped one of his eyes out, grasped it in his right hand and snaked
his right arm out in search of the wayward ring.
He found it soon enough. However, to grasp the
ring, he had to set his eyeball down. Unfortunately for Bender, his
eyeball was pointed straight up Rebecca’s dress.
As he was slipping
the ring on, but before he could retrieve his eye, Rebecca happened
to glance down at the floor. Her instant reaction was to stomp on
Bender’s hand. She was ready to rip that arm right out of its
socket. Then she noticed the wedding ring on Bender’s finger.
She glanced up and saw both Bender and Albert
looking at her pleadingly. It dawned on her what had happened, so
she took her foot off Bender’s hand which swiftly withdrew with
both ring and eyeball intact. The ring was back in its place on the
cushion just before the Rabbi said, “Amen!”
Rabbi Liebgott turned to Fry, “Philip, do
you have a passage of Scripture you would like to read to Leela?”
Fry nodded. He
took a slip of paper from his pocket and read, “This is from
the Song of Solomon, Chapter 8. It says, ‘Place me like a seal
over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as
death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like a blazing
fire, like a mighty flame. Many waters cannot quench love; rivers
cannot wash it away. If one were to give all the wealth of his house
for love, it would be utterly scorned.”
The crowd murmured their approval.
Then the Rabbi turned to Leela. “Leela, is
there a passage of Scripture you would like to recite to Philip?”
Leela nodded and
said, “When I was in the Orphanarium, Mr. Vogel used to read
this every week. I learned it by heart. It is from the thirteenth
chapter of First Corinthians. She cleared her throat and spoke in
clear, measured tones, “If I speak in the tongues of men and of
angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging
cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries
and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but
have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and
surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.”
Out in the
audience, several people began to dab at their eyes. Leela noticed
them, but continued without pausing.
patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not
proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily
angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil
but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts,
always hopes, always perseveres.”
Now there were
audible sobs coming from the pews. Amy and LaBarbara had begun to
wipe away tears as well. Still, Leela continued on.
fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there
are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will
pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when
perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I
talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child.
When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a
poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I
know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the
greatest of these is love.”
There was a moment of profound silence punctuated
by sniffles and muffled sobs. It lasted until Rabbi Liebgott –
who had been forced to dash away a tear or two – turned to face
Morris and Munda. He asked, “Who gives this woman away to be
married to this man?”
Both Morris and
Munda rose before answering, “We do.” Then they sat
Pausing for a moment, Rabbi Liebgott looked out
over the crowd in the Sanctuary before solemnly intoning, “If
there is anyone who knows of any reason why these two should not be
joined together in the bonds of holy matrimony, let them speak now…or
forever hold their peace.”
After a moment’s pause in which no sound
came from the crowd, the Rabbi turned to Fry.
Philip J. Fry take Turanga Leela to be your wife? Do you promise to
love, honor, cherish and protect her, forsaking all others and
holding only unto her for long as you both shall live?"
lightheaded, but he answered in a voice that was clearly filled with
joy, "I do" “Do you, Turanga Leela take
Philip J. Fry to be your husband? Do you promise to love, honor,
cherish and protect him, forsaking all others and holding only unto
him for long as you both shall live?"
In what sounded to
Fry like the voice of an angel, Leela responded, "I do"
The Rabbi turned
to Albert with a smile, “The rings, please.”
Albert stepped forward. He had a nervous smile
plastered on his face, but his hands were rock steady. Unbeknownst
to him, Bender was poised to move swiftly if another disaster looked
in the making.
In a solemn voice, Rabbi Liebgott intoned, “The
giving and taking of rings has been practiced for as long as recorded
history. These rings serve as outward symbols of your love and
devotion to each other. Philip, I invite you to place the ring on
Leela’s finger. Leela, I invite you to do the same for
hands, Fry took the gold band from the purple velvet cushion. He
took Leela’s left hand in his as he poised the ring to slide it
onto her finger. He took a deep breath before he said, “With
this ring, I thee wed; all my love, I do thee give."
the veil as she felt the ring slide onto her finger, Leela reflected
for a few seconds on how nervous Fry was, but how well he was doing.
She was conscious of being proud of him. Then she took his left hand
in hers to place the wedding band in place as she said, “With
this ring, I thee wed; all my love, I do thee give."
The Rabbi smiled
broadly, “By the authority invested in me by the City and State
of New-New York, I now pronounce you husband and wife.” After
a short pause, he added with a twinkle in his eye, “You may
kiss the bride.”
Fry raised the
veil to gaze for the first time at Leela as his wife! In his eyes,
she never looked lovelier. “This time,” he reflected, “I
won’t have a flower arrangement stuffed down my throat.”
Leela smiled seductively just as their lips met.
Their kiss was one of pure love, a love that had endured many trials
during their trip to the Altar, but it was a love that had
When they parted,
they faced the crowd in the Sanctuary, which had risen to their feet.
In a booming voice, Rabbi Liebgott announced, “Ladies and
Gentlemen, I present to you Mr. and Mrs. Philip J. Fry!”
The cheer that exploded forth form the crowd
seemed to raise the roof. All Fry could think was, “My God!
She’s really mine at last!”
Sanctuary, Church of the Alpha and the Omega, June 30, 3004, 1230
Hermes and the
all-girl band of Sarah, Chelsea and Caitlyn struck up the
recessional. Fry and Leela stepped off arm-in-arm, in perfect
unison, the ideal bride and groom. Beaming smiles at the crowd, they
moved regally down the aisle. Every eye in the Sanctuary was riveted
Once they transited the aisle, they made a sharp
left. They walked down a paneled hallway into the area that held the
church offices. At the second door on the right they paused. Fry
opened the door, holding it for Leela as she entered the senior
pastors’ office. It was a large, comfortable office suite
complete with a desk, leather couch, several overstuffed leather
chairs. It even had a bathroom with a shower.
Fry took Leela’s hand in his, “Well,
all we have to do is wait for Bender to come and get us for our
‘Grand Entrance’ into the reception.”
She smiled, “Then why don’t we sit on
the couch and wait, like the old married couple that we are?”
couple,” Fry said as though tasting the words, “yeah, I
like the sound of that…I like it a lot.” He grinned at
her, a full-force Fry-at-his-best grin. Like all of his best grins,
it got results from Leela.
With a speed that
amazed Fry, Leela embraced him like she had on the Titanic. She
planted a kiss that made his toes tingle. Then it felt as though his
bones had melted. He went limp, reveling in the warmth of their
Then he began to
kiss her back - passionately. Fry returned Leela’s embrace,
his arms encircling her and pulling her close. Now it was Leela’s
turn to feel light headed. “Wow,” she thought, “Phil
has never kissed me like that before!”
realizing it, they sank to the couch. This time, it was Leela who
came to her senses first. “Phil,” she almost gasped, “we
have to go to the reception in a few minutes.”
“Oh,” he gasped, “right!”
other, they sat side-by-side. The only sound in the room was their
ragged breathing slowly returning to normal. Fry reached out and
took Leela by the hand. Their fingers intertwined as they sat there
Leela spoke first, “It was really a lovely
“Yeah, it couldn’t have been
“Phil, were you nervous?”
Fry thought for a
moment before answering, “A little. The only thing I was
worried was that you’d come to your senses and run away.”
He paused before continuing, “Were you nervous?”
Biting her lip
thoughtfully, Leela replied, “Yes, I was nervous before my dad
took me down the aisle. But once I entered the Sanctuary, my
nervousness all went away.” She smiled, “I used the
techniques Rabbi Liebgott told me to keep from panicking.” Then
she suddenly giggled, “As you can see, they worked really well.
I didn’t bolt on you.”
Fry nodded in
reply and they lapsed into silence. Looking down at their clasped
hands, Fry thought back to the first time he and Leela had held
hands. “It was down in the ruins of Old New York,” he
mused, “it felt like electricity ran through my body when she
placed her hand on mine.”
How many times had he dreamt of a moment like
this? How many tears had he shed in silence, bitter tears of longing
and frustration? Well that was the past, now they were
married…joined together forever if he had anything to say
At his side, Leela
felt shame as she thought of all the times she had spurned Fry. She
realized now what the problem had been. She had wanted to feel
secure with a man in a way that Fry had not made her feel secure.
“What a fool you were,” Leela admonished herself
mentally, “to equate security in a relationship with anything
other than the commitment of the other partner.”
Leela realized that Fry has shown more commitment
than she has ever encountered. His dogged devotion to her in the
face of all troubles had finally made her realize that he was the one
man for her. “Thank you God, that I didn’t lose him,”
Fry looked at her, “I’m sorry?”
She smiled as she
turned and lovingly patted his cheek, “Nothing, dear.”
There was a rap at the door. Without waiting for
a reply, Bender came into the office. He looked somehow disappointed
as he boomed out, “Time for the reception meatbags.”
Fry and Leela
stood up together, still holding hands. Bender found that, in spite
of himself, deep within his circuits he was growing used to the idea
of Fry and Leela as a married couple. He envied his friends for the
closeness they’d found, but…being Bender…he
wasn’t about to show it.
Instead, he said sarcastically, “I half
expected to find you two mammals breeding in here. That’s why
Leela confused him by answering him sweetly,
“Thank you Bender.”
Grumbling to himself, Bender turned and left the
room, heading for the reception.
Fry turned to Leela, “Are you ready, Mrs.
Leela laid her head on his shoulder briefly before
responding, “Yes Mr. Fry, I am ready, willing and eager.”
“Then let’s go.”
Meeting Hall, Church of the Alpha and the Omega, June 30, 3004, 1310
When Fry and Leela
made their “Grand Entrance” Leela was impressed with the
lavish decorations and the organization of the room. Amy had arranged
the room with a single rectangular head table at one end. Two rows
of ten circular tables ran perpendicular to each end of the head
table for a total of twenty-one tables.
The hall was
festooned with silver and white streamers that crisscrossed the
ceiling as well. Each table was done in silver and white, including
the centerpieces, which featured a dozen white roses apiece. The
floor was strewn with Blue Altarian Rose petals, perfuming the air
with their fragrance.
Leela and Fry took
their seats at the head table along with the rest of the wedding
party. At the head table, from left to right sat Hermes and LaBarbara
Conrad, Turanga Morris and Munda, Albert and Sally, Fry and Leela,
Bender, Kif Kroker and Amy Wong, the Professor, and Melissa.
To the right of
the head table sat the rest of the Planet Express crowd. Starting
at the top of the table sat James Martindale and Sarah Foster, XT and
Chelsea, CosmicF and Chenxi Wong, Zoidberg, Caitlyn, Brad and
Katrina, Cubert Farnsworth and Dwight Conrad.
To the left of the
head table sat friends and family. Beginning at the top of the table
sat Leo and Inez Wong, Anthony “Lip” Lipford and Judy,
Joseph Kershaw, two of Leela’s cousins – Carla and Betty
with their dates, and Dwayne and Wanda.
Seated at the next
table were all of the children from Orphanarium, chaperoned by Mr.
Vogel and Rebecca. The rest of the tables were packed with friends
and family from across the Galaxy. They were all in a festive mood,
filling the hall with joyful chatter.
The room was
relatively silent during the buffet-style dinner. There was a small
amount of chatter, but the loudest sounds were the clinking of
cutlery on plate. Elzar had outdone himself. The crowd consumed
Neptunian Slug, Buggalo wings, Space Roc Eggs, and Slug Fritters by
the tray full. As one guest later said, “If anyone went away
hungry, it was their own fault.”
After a buffet
style dinner, the dancing began. Fry led Leela onto the floor, where
they danced to a big band song they had first heard over Armed Forces
Radio in June of 1944, My Everything.
“You are to me…everything,
My life to me…everything,
When in my dreams you appear,
There stars and deep blue appear,
Each time our lips…touch
I yearn for you…so much
You are my favorite
My haven in heaven above,
You are everything I love.”
When Leela and Fry
sat back down, Albert asked Fry, “Can I go talk to some of the
Fry smiled as he
looked at Albert’s chubby, sincere face, “Sure.”
Albert slid from
his seat and scooted off to talk to the other kids from the
Orphanarium. Sally remained where she was, chatting like a magpie
with Munda. When Morris and Munda got up for their dance, Sally sat
patiently. As soon as Munda returned, they resumed their
conversation right where they had left off.
While waiting for
the wedding party to finish their round of dances, James and Sarah
sat silently, holding hands. James was thinking about a proper way
to pop the question when he heard Albert’s voice, “Excuse
me, Mr. Martindale, but do you mind if I ask you some questions about
James turned to see Albert standing there with a
smile on his rotund face. James nodded, “Sure Albert, what do
you want to know?”
“Are you a real cop?”
furrowed, “I guess that depends on what you call real. I’m
a licensed private investigator.”
“Oh.” Albert sounded slightly
Sarah spoke up,
“If you’re looking for a Peeler, then you might want to
talk to that bloke over there.” She pointed at Lip and
continued, “He’s fair dinkum.”
Although he hadn’t understood exactly what
Sarah had said, Albert guessed that the tall man in the long coat was
some sort of policeman. He smiled at Sarah, “Thank you,
ma’am.” Then he took off to talk to Lip.
Sarah gave a short laugh as Albert walked away, “I shall be
getting myself a white wig and a cane shortly.” She shook her
head in amusement, “Lord! But that does make me feel old being
James squeezed her hand affectionately as he said
with a grin, “No worries, mate! I think you’ve a long
way to go before you need a cane.”
She smiled at
James’ using the word mate. She touched his cheek
affectionately, “That’s mighty thoughtful of you Jimbo!”
She gave another short laugh, “It looks like the party’s
open for all comers. Care to take the old Battleaxe out onto the
“You don’t mind being seen with a
fugitive from a berserk tanning bed?”
she said through her laughter, “you sure know how to make this
Before James could
respond, Sarah threw her arms around his neck and gave him a
passionate kiss. As he was recovering, she looked into his eyes and
breathed in a husky voice, “Faint heart ne’er won fair
lady Jimbo. Now let’s get onto that dance floor before I shock
James replied with
some difficulty, “Right away, my love, right away.”
Meeting Hall, Church of the Alpha and the Omega, June 30, 3004, 1400
approached the table where “Lip” Lipford sat talking to
Judy. He didn’t want to be rude, so he stood at a short
distance away waiting for a break in the conversation. When he
judged that the time was right, he stepped forward.
“Excuse me sir,” he asked, “are
you a policeman?”
Lip turned slightly in his seat to size Albert up.
Giving a half smile he asked in a friendly way, “Who wants to
“Oh, I’m sorry sir. My name is Albert
and Mr. Martindale told me you were a policeman. I don’t mean
to bother you.”
“That’s okay, kid.” Lip paused
for a moment before sticking out his hand, “I’m Detective
Sergeant Anthony Lipford. My friends call me Lip.”
With his most adult look on his face, Albert
reached out to shake Lip’s hand. His hand disappeared in Lip’s
for a moment as they shook hands. Albert was amazed at Lip’s
gentleness. When they completed the handshake, Albert asked
tentatively, “Do you mind if I ask you some questions?”
“Sure Albert, go right ahead.”
“How long have you been a policeman?”
Lip rubbed his chin, “Let me see…if
my memory serves me right…I’ve been on the force for
Albert looked impressed, “Wow! It normally
takes that long just to make detective!”
A smile flickered across Lip’s face as he
regarded Albert a bit more closely. “Few kids his age would
know that,” passed through Lip’s mind before he said, “So
Albert, are you interested in being a cop?”
“Yes sir, but everybody says I’m too
fat and clumsy.”
let ‘em rain on your parade, Kid.” Lip said with a sudden
fierce conviction in his voice. Everyone at the table stopped
talking at the sound. Lip paused long enough foe everyone to resume
their conversations, then he leaned closer to Albert.
Lip whispered conspiratorially, “Know what
they used to call me?”
Albert’s face reflected the surprise in his
Sometimes they called me Chubs or Fatso…or Dorkford.”
He smiled, “But the laugh is on them now.”
“Kid, if you want to be a cop…go for
it.” Lip’s jaw was firmly set, as if he was ready to
start throwing punches, “There are always plenty of jerks who
will want to pull you down, but don’t you let them.”
Reaching out to
briefly tousle Albert’s hair, Lip said in a voice tinged with
emotion, “You remind me of myself at your age. My old man was
a cop and I wanted to be just like him. One day when I was twelve,
he went to work and never came home. He was killed in the line of
When Lip saw tears beginning to well in Albert’s
eyes, he quickly changed his tone, “Hey, how’d you like
to come down to Headquarters for a tour?”
Albert snuffled briefly, and then exclaimed
joyously, “Wow! Would I? I mean, yes sir, I certainly would.”
“Good. I’ll come get you from the
Albert burst into
tears, hugging Lip fiercely. Lip hugged him back, murmuring, “It’s
okay Tiger, it’s okay.”
Once Albert had cried himself out, Lip said, “You
sit here with Judy and me for the rest of this shindig, okay?”
For the rest of the reception Albert sat with Judy
and Lip, chatting away with them whenever they weren’t on the
dance floor. For the first time in his young life, Albert felt
really at home.
Meeting Hall, Church of the Alpha and the Omega, June 30, 3004, 1500
The party was still going strong when Joseph
Kershaw came up to the table where James and Sarah were taking a
short break from dancing. Kershaw asked politely in his soft South
Carolina accent, “Wonderful party, isn’t it Mr.
Kershaw with a bit of a surprise, “Mr. Martindale? Why
Mr. Kershaw, I believe you want to talk some business!”
Pulling a face,
Kershaw nodded, “Unfortunately I must intrude for a moment.”
Then he bowed politely to Sarah, “With your permission, Sarah.”
“Righto, I’ll just make myself scarce for a moment or
for her to remain seated, “Please, that will not be necessary.”
He gave her a charming smile, “I would not deprive James for an
instant of the company of one of the fairest flowers at this
Sarah gave a merry
peal of laughter, “You make me sound like a bonzer
finished laughing, Kershaw resumed, “James, I stand in urgent
need of your talents.”
“What’s the job?”
Kershaw took a
seat next to James, “Someone is pushing very hard behind the
scenes to invoke the Mutant Edicts. I want to know who is doing the
pushing and why.”
“Isn’t Poopenmeyer behind it?”
can scarcely credit that a man of your intellect would believe that
for a moment.” A sour look crossed Kershaw’s face,
“Poopenmeyer is so dumb he can scarcely get through a doorway
without hitting his head.”
Both James and
Sarah laughed at the remark and Kershaw joined in. Then he continued
in a serious tone, “This terrorism business is being carefully
orchestrated by someone with a lot more grey matter, and malice, than
old C. Randall could ever manage.”
“I take it you have some compelling interest
in this matter?”
“Yes, I do.
On the 4th of July I will be filing a brief in Federal
Court to annul the Mutant Edicts as unconstitutional. I am certain
I’ll win the case.”
James nodded in agreement, “Okay. I’ll
take the job. My usual rates apply.”
As Sarah had sat listening to the conversation her
curiosity was roused. When it appeared that Kershaw was preparing to
leave, Sarah asked, “Jimbo, I’ve noticed that Mr. Kershaw
has been a regular wall flower this evening. Do you mind if I take
him for a dance?”
“No,” James said with an enigmatic
smile, “I have no objection at all.”
Kershaw held his hands up in protest, “Really,
I could not impose…”
“Surely you would not be so ungallant as to
refuse a lady a dance.” Sarah said in her best imitation of a
“Very well, but I fear that I am not much of a dancer. I’ve
not had much practice, you see.”
“We’ll soon fix that.”
They moved onto
the dance floor. James watched them go and thought, “What’s
she on to, I wonder?”
Sarah and Kershaw made small talk for a minute or
two before Sarah asked the question that was on her mind, “Mr.
“Do call me Joseph, all my friends do.”
“Joseph, why are you interested in
protecting the mutants’ legal rights?”
He took a deep breath, “Let’s finish
the dance, for if I begin the story, I’m afraid that my
attention will wander so much that your feet will suffer.”
They finished the
dance in silence and returned to the table. Kershaw said to James,
“Your lovely lady has asked me to tell her why I am interested
in helping mutants. You know much of the story, James. However, I
hope that I do not bore you too much.”
“Not at all.”
his throat, “Many years ago, I was a young lawyer in
Charleston, South Carolina. My family was one of the most prominent
in the State. As the eldest son, I was held to carry the fortune of
my family on my shoulders. Everyone expected that I would marry
among one of the prominent Charleston families and carry on the
He shook his head, “But fate did not have it
so. A beautiful young lady came down from the North to visit her
relatives. Her name was Flora MacDonald. The first time I saw her,
I was rooted to the spot. It is no exaggeration to say that it was
love at first sight.”
“She was wearing a lovely hat when I first
met her.” Kershaw chuckled, “I didn’t know it at
the time, but it concealed a third ear in the center of her
forehead.” He exhaled, “Not that it would have mattered,
for I had fallen in love.”
“To make a
long story short, I courted her and won her affections. We were
engaged to be married. Then, one day, she disappeared…”
Kershaw fell silent as he obviously strove to control his emotions.
Sarah asked gently, “What happened?”
His face flushed with anger as he answered, “I
later found out that some of my female relations had persuaded her
that marriage to a mutant would harm my career. She went home to
New-New York rather than be a burden to me.”
“I went North to search for her, only to be
told she had died of a fever. I was, as you can imagine, broken
hearted.” He paused as if reflecting on what to say next,
“There’s not much else to tell except that I swore that I
would do all in my power to eradicate the injustice of the Mutant
Edicts and the ignorance that support them.”
When Kershaw remained silent she asked, “Did
you ever marry?”
“No, I did not. I had promised my love to
Flora. No one else ever came up to her lights in my eyes.”
for sharing that with me.” Sarah’s voice was sincere, “I
hope I didn’t stir up too many painful memories. I’m
such a stickybeak.”
Kershaw laughed, “Not at all, Sarah.”
While Sarah and Kershaw had been talking, Leela
and Fry had sat down at the head table for a short breather. From
where Sarah sat, she could see both Kershaw and Leela as they sat in
almost the same attitude.
Sarah felt the hair on her neck rise when she
realized that with the exception of the number of eyes, Leela and
Kershaw bore an uncanny resemblance to each other. True, Kershaw had
white hair, but there were still touches of rich purple in his top
“Oh my God,” Sarah thought, “I
wonder if anyone else notices?” Before she could bring it up,
Kershaw rose, “I’m terribly sorry, but I must pay my
respects to the bride and groom. I have to catch a flight to
Charleston shortly to visit with my brothers for Freedom Day.”
Kershaw shook Sarah and James’ hands and
then walked to the head table. Sarah sat pondering for a moment.
The she decided, “This is one mystery I’m going to
unravel myself…just as a bit of fun.”
James intruded on her thoughts, “Want to
She sprang to her feet, “Absolutely Jimbo!
Let’s show these folks a Corroboree!”
100 East 123rd Street, June 30, 3004, 2100 (9:00 p.m.)
It had been a perfect reception. When Fry and
Leela left, more than half of the guests were still there. Amy had
whispered to Leela, “Get out of here, already! You’ll
get Fry so tired, he won’t be able to perform.”
Leela had giggled at the thought. She knew that
if they stayed up until midnight, Fry would be ready, willing, and
able. Still, there was no sense in taking chances, so she had
persuaded Fry it was time to go.
During the limo
ride home, they had sat closely together, simply holding hands.
Leela had taken her gloves off to enjoy the feel of Fry’s palm
pressed against hers. Surprisingly, they rode the entire distance to
their apartment without speaking a word.
Now they stood in
front of their apartment. Fry turned to Leela, “Leels, you
have to close your eye.”
She replied in a voice tinged with amusement,
“Because I have a surprise for you.”
“Ooh, I like surprises.”
“Good, then close your eye…please.”
Leela’s eyelid closed tightly, “Okay,
I’ve got my eye closed.”
“No peeking! You promise?”
“I promise, no peeking.”
Leela listened with keen interest to the events
that followed. First, the door lock chirped as it recognized Fry’s
career chip. Then the door slid open and she could hear Fry rush
into the apartment.
The sounds that she heard were confusing. First
it sounded like Fry was emptying a bag of its contents. Then she
heard a fire starter hissing for a few moments. She wondered, “What
on earth is he doing?”
The next sound was that of some sort of aerosol
can spewing its contents forth. Then, music began to play softly.
She was about to open her eye when she heard Fry say, “Okay
Leels, I’m going to carry you across the threshold. Keep your
eye closed until I set you down, Okay?”
She was surprised
at how deftly Fry lifted her from the floor to carry her across the
threshold. What she didn’t know was that Fry had rehearsed the
action with Amy earlier that day. Unlike Amy, Leela was in no danger
of having her head whacked against the door jamb.
“I’m setting you down, okay?”
“Okay. Can I open my eye now?”
Leela gasped at
the sight that met her eye. Fry had outdone himself! The apartment
was illuminated in the glow of a dozen candles. Strewn throughout the
apartment was a multi-colored carpet of rose petals. Their fragrance,
along with the aroma of the candles was perfect for creating a
romantic atmosphere. The soft, romantic music that mingled in the
air with the fragrances completed the spell.
entranced, “Phil, this is so perfect.”
Fry kissed her on
the neck, “Not nearly as perfect as you.”
Leela took his hand, “Come on husband. We
have things to do.” Then she nearly dragged him to the bedroom.
She glanced around, noticing the pastels colors, the Blue Altarian
Roses (her favorite), and every other little touch.
Whirling around, she embraced Fry, “Oh Phil,
you’ve made everything absolutely perfect. I knew you were
romantic…but I never knew…” her voice trailed
off. She took a deep breath, “Could you help me undo my
“Sure!” Fry replied enthusiastically.
When Leela turned her back to him, Fry looked at the silken ribbons
that closed the back of her dress. “Crud,” he thought,
“this is the one thing I didn’t rehearse.”
Not wanting to ruin the mood, he set to work
untying the ribbons. The problem was, he was so nervous that his
fingers had trouble manipulating the knots. This led to him becoming
even more nervous.
Luckily, the stubborn knots proved less stubborn
than Fry. He managed to get them undone, sliding both ribbons loose
from the dress. He could see Leela’s back, which was now bare
from her shoulders to the small of her back.
He stepped back to admire her, “Lord, you
are so beautiful!”
seductively, Leela looked over her shoulder and said teasingly, “You
are a hot blooded beast!” She paused before continuing, “I’m
going into the bathroom to change. I’ll be right back.”
With that, she went into the bathroom, closing the
“Wow!” Fry breathed to himself, “Don’t
change too much!” Then he set about readying himself for the
evening to come.
100 East 123rd Street, June 30, 3004, 2110 (9:10 p.m.)
smiled as she heard the door slide shut behind her. Amy’s
advice swirled through her mind, “Let Fry wait for a few
minutes, it will build his anticipation!” She decided that Amy
was right as she slowly stepped out of her Wedding Gown. Carefully,
she hung it on a hanger, stepping back to admire it. She smoothed
out a few imaginary wrinkles in the silken fabric before she turned
to face the mirror on the wall.
Still smiling, Leela spoke softly
into the air, “Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest
of them all?”
The mirror remained silent.
Leela stuck her tongue out at the
mirror as she finished undressing. As always, she folded each
garment neatly as she removed it. Soon she stood before the mirror
wearing only her smile.
Conscious of a growing feeling of
nervous excitement, Leela breathed softly to herself, “It’s
only Fry. He’s only my husband.”
As soon as the word “husband”
escaped her lips, she began to tremble. “Oh my God,”
flashed through her mind, “Fry is my husband…my
She held her hands up in a ‘slow
down’ gesture. “Get a grip on yourself Leela,” she
said quietly, “There’s nothing to be nervous about.”
A voice seemed to sound in her head,
“Then why are you standing quivering in front of mirror, stark
“I am not afraid of Fry!”
she said out loud.
She heard Fry muffled voice from the
other side of the door, “Do you need some help?”
“No!” she almost shouted.
Then in a calmer voice she called, “Just a few moments, Phil,
then I’ll be out.”
Leela held her hand to her mouth and
exhaled. “Ugh!” she thought, “I need to brush my
teeth!” Taking a toothbrush from the holder, she vigorously
scrubbed her teeth. Once she was finished, she tested her breath
again. This time it passed inspection.
She scrutinized herself in the mirror
again. She turned to where she could see herself in profile. “I
look so fat,” she thought, “and my hair is a mess!”
Grasping a brush from the counter,
she began to brush her hair in long, rhythmic strokes. Soon every
tangle, real and imagined, was straightened out and it flowed through
the brush like purple silk.
“Should I take a shower,”
Leela wondered, “or should I wait until after?” She
stood still for a moment before deciding to wait for a shower.
“I’m back in control of
my nerves,” she thought, “time to get dressed.”
With that thought, Leela took the bag from Viktoria’s Secret
from beneath the counter. She opened it and took out the silken
garments that she had tried on so hastily a few days ago.
She shook her head, “Amy really
picked out some hot numbers…but they just aren’t me.”
Pausing, Leela reflected, “Should
I just go out there in my birthday suit? It would certainly get a
reaction out of Fry.” The thought of Fry’s reaction made
“No,” she decided after
she stopped giggling, “I’ll stick with the plan.”
Having made up her mind, Leela
slipped on the panties. “You’ll never see these in the
Bulk Underpants Outlet catalogue,” she mused. Next she donned
the top. It was lustrous silk georgette, lavished with embroidery,
beading, and sequins that tied at the neck.
“Well,” she breathed,
“I’m ready.” As she approached the door she managed
a quick grin, “Look out Fry, here I come!”
100 East 123rd Street, June 30, 3004, 2110 (9:10 p.m.)
When the door closed behind Leela,
Fry went into a victory dance much like an NFL Player who had just
scored a touchdown. “Yes!” he said between his clenched
teeth as he capered about, so full of joy that he felt he might
“Time to get ready for action,”
he thought. Quickly stripping off his tuxedo, he found that he was
actually quivering with anticipation. “Leela Fry” he
said softly to himself, “what a wonderful name.”
As he peeled off his tee shirt, he
felt a sense of alarm. In his haste to get ready, he had thrown his
clothes all over the bedroom! Knowing Leela’s sense of order,
he realized that an untidy bedroom could be a major mood killer.
Like a man possessed, he gathered up
the scattered garments and hung them up neatly. “Whew!”
he breathed, “That was a close call!”
Back on track, he checked to make
sure that the small heating unit by the bed was full of lightly
scented massage oil. He tested it with his finger. Perfect!
Leela’s voice sounded from the
bathroom, but he had missed what she said. He called out, “Do
you need some help?”
“No!” she almost shouted.
Then in a calmer voice she called, “Just a few moments, Phil,
then I’ll be out.”
He grinned broadly, “She called
me Phil! Woo Hoo!”
He whipped off his tightie-whities
and stood there for a brief moment in the buff. Then he reached into
a dresser drawer and produced a small surprise for Leela.
“Leels thinks I don’t
know much about 31st century style,” Fry thought,
“Wait ‘till she gets a look at these!” He slipped
on a brand-new set of “Faster-Than-Light Briefs.” They
were bright red and very complementary to his physique.
“Look out Leela! Fry is on the
He could hear Leela giggling on the
other side of the bathroom door. “Oh Lord, did she hear me?”
Before he could make up his mind, the
door slid open.
With the light from behind casting a
penumbra about her figure, she looked like an angel to Fry. The Silk
baby doll georgette complimented her figure perfectly. Her lustrous
purple hair fell in a rich cascade to her shoulders. Her lips were
parted slightly, showing her perfect teeth. In her eye burned the
fire of love.
Fry felt his knees begin to knock
together as his heart pounded in his chest. His palms became moist
and his mouth became as dry as a desert. She smiled seductively and
began to move toward him.
“Oh Mamma!” Fry said in a
trembling voice, “Where have you been all my life?”
100 East 123rd Street, June 30, 3004, 2115 (9:15 p.m.)
The sight of Fry in his FTL Briefs
had shocked Leela a bit. Not accustomed to seeing Fry in any thing
stylish, his sudden adoption of high fashion excited her…because
she knew that he did it for her!
“He looks nervous,” she
thought, “Well, we can’t have that!” Those twin
thoughts caused her to smile seductively as she padded slowly across
the floor to the spot where Fry stood seemingly rooted to the spot.
The closer Leela got to Fry, the harder it became to control her
feelings. She found that an impulse to simply ravish Fry was almost
Standing face-to-face within inches
of each other, Leela asked in a voice made husky by emotion, “Hey
sailing-unit! Want to have a good time?”
Fry’s response surprised her.
He embraced her, giving her a deep, soulful kiss. At first she was
too surprised to react, but her surprise lasted only a few seconds.
Then she returned his kiss with passionate fervor.
They stood there at the foot of the
bed, joined in a kiss of pure love. Leela ran her fingers into Fry’s
hair as she hooked her left leg around Fry’s legs…pulling
their bodies closer together. They looked like a carved marble
masterpiece, so perfect was their unity.
When at last their lips parted Fry
spoke first, “Tonight is your night, Leela. My only goal is to
An uncontrollable shiver ran down
Leela’s spine when she heard those words. She closed her eye
before replying in a somewhat shaky voice, “Is that heated
massage oil by the bed?”
Fry nodded, “It sure is. I
thought you might like a special massage.”
On an impish impulse, Leela asked,
“Like the one you used to give your old girlfriend…what
was her name…Michelle?”
Fry made some inarticulate noises,
which caused Leela to burst into laughter. However, Fry’s
crestfallen look cut her laughter short. Feeling stupid for trying
to be funny, she took his right earlobe in between her teeth. She
whispered huskily in his ear, “I still plan on eating you alive
Showing he still had a sense of
humor, Fry whispered, “I thought we
weren’t ever going back to Cannibalon?”
“I love you,” Leela said
as she squeezed him tightly. Then she stepped back and took him by
the hand, leading him to the bed. She gestured to him to lie down,
“I know what I want Fry, I want to give you a massage.”
“No ifs, ands, or buts! You
put me in charge tonight, so get ready for a super-dooper massage!”
Fry pulled off his FTL Briefs and
stretched out on his stomach. He laid his head on his arms, looking
toward the side of the bed where Leela stood, oiling her hands. When
she first touched his back, he felt as though he was going to jump
out of his skin. Her touch was so sensual that he felt like he was
going to burst.
“You seem awfully tense, Phil.”
Leela asked in a low whisper, “Are you tense?”
His voice came out about two octaves
above normal, “No, what makes you say that?”
Both of them laughed at the same
instant, relieving some of the tension. Fry was surprised by the
strength Leela had in her hands. She worked his muscles expertly,
relaxing them while stimulating his spirit.
After what seemed like an hour to
Fry, Leela breathed, “Roll over so I can finish the job.”
Obediently, Fry rolled over. He
looked up at Leela as she stood by their bed. “Good Lord
Leela, you are so beautiful!”
She smiled, “You think so?”
Fry nodded vigorously.
Lazily, Leela reached up behind her
neck with both hands. One hand held her rich purple hair up while
the other undid the tie to her top. When it was undone, she removed
Fry gave an appreciative gasp at the
Leela leaned over, taking Fry’s
face in her hands. In a voice full of emotion she almost whispered,
“I love you Phil.”
His arms reached up to pull her onto
the bed, “I love you too.”
100 East 123rd Street, July 1, 3004, 0015 (12:15 a.m.)
They lay there relaxed, with their
limbs entwined, as only those who have had a perfect union of body
and spirit can relax.
In the darkness of the room, Leela’s
lay with her head on Fry’s chest. She listened to the measured
beating of his heart, wondering if he had fallen asleep. She
considered waking him, but then she dismissed the thought.
“Let him rest,” Leela
thought. A smile flickered across her face in response to the next
thought of, “I really wore him out.”
Her body was sore, but it was a
pleasant soreness. She hadn’t flexed that much in years. “I
felt like a pretzel,” she murmured aloud.
At the sound, Fry’s hand came
up from the bed and began to gently stroke her hair. It made her
start a bit, “Phil, did I wake you?”
“No Leels, you didn’t
wake me. I was just sort of half asleep.”
“Do you want to…?”
His voice sounded sleepy, “Only
if you really want to.”
Leela raised her head from his chest.
From the dim light of the alarm clock, she could dimly see the
outline of his face. He looked tired. She patted him on the chest,
“As much as I’d love to, we both need some sleep. We
have to pick up Sally and have dinner with my parents tomorrow.”
Trying to sound disappointed, but
actually relieved, Fry said, “You’re the boss.”
The ludicrousness of the situation
caused Leela to laugh. In a teasing voice she said, “Now I
really know we are married! Soon you’ll be watching blernsball
rather than coming to bed to cuddle with me.”
In response Fry pulled her close, “No
way is that ever going to happen!” He kissed her lightly on
her forehead. The thought of ever passing up a chance to cuddle with
Leela caused him to laugh, “You know what they say, the spirit
is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised.”
Leela joined in his laughter. Then
she remembered where she had heard that expression before! Zapp had
used it on Amazonia…so long ago. She felt a bit sick to her
stomach as thoughts of her brief sexual encounter with Zapp crowded
in on her consciousness. “Ugh!” she thought, “Zapp
was such a pig. Why did I ever sleep with him?”
Fry felt her body suddenly tense and
her laughter become a bit strained. He wasn’t sure what had
happened, so he asked, “Hey, are you Okay?”
Forcing thoughts of Zapp from her
mind, Leela responded cheerfully, “Yes, I’m fine dear.”
To fry she sounded weary as she said, “Let’s go to sleep.
We’ve got a long day ahead of us.”
Fry took her face in his hand and kissed her gently, “Goodnight…wife.”
Leela smiled, “Goodnight husband…pleasant dreams.”
Within moments they were both asleep, dreaming of their future together.