Futurama

Fan Fiction

Fry And Leela Happy Endings From Bender, Part 1
By Rush

This story is about Farnsworth who has apparently invented a new time paradox code, that makes copies of the universe from going back or forward in time, but only makes copies of the universe where you originally said it, also there is no doom rating at all in, the new parallel universes, that Bender is going to make.

Can anyone understand that what I said there? I sure cant.


Opening Quote" Welcome To The World Of Yesterday!"

Announce"All new yet old feature length epic adventure, Staring Fry,Leela,Bender,Some-Guy who no one knows what he looks like and an few Others. Is brought to you by. Its the next best thing to Popplers *Farmer Jim's Deep Fried In Pure Fat Buggalo Nuggets* The fast bad for you food thats good for yea!"

Scene Planet Express Sub-Basement. Bender sits with his ass on ground Farnsworth explains the details of his new invention but also Farnsworth looks like someone in his mid 50s.

Farnsworth"Good news you. I have invented an new and better time paradox code that does not make paradox copies and you can go both forward and backward in time, plus there is no chance of making an crack in the universe."

Bender"Would you care to explain the science behind that of how you invented an new time code and even know of the first time paradox code? Because I've never heard of it"

Farnsworth"Nooo! Now Bender I must warn you, ever time you say that new time code I've invented, you create new parallel universes, copies of this universe , so there is no chance of ever coming back here were you have or going to say the originally new time code."

Bender not listening"Yeah ,Yeah, I give Fry and Leela happy endings, along the way to my stop point in time before Fry was killed by a Space-Bee, now give me the time code."

Farnsworth"Not yet. Anyhoo be sure that you do, although on a negative note then I wouldn't be able to harvest Leela's organs.

Bender"And?"

Farnsworth"Well, when Leela had committed suicide a week after Fry's death I harvested her organs and put them in that box over there."

Farnsworth points beside the brown worn couch with trace amounts of Fry's ,hear, blood, and other DNA things. There is an light blue box thats marked Leela's organs beside the couch on the hand right side on the couch.

Bender"Your sick in the head. You know that. Don't you?"

Farnsworth"Oh my yes indeed I know. Now here you go."

Farnsworth walks over and inserts the new time paradox code cassette into Bender's mouth.

Farnsworth"Now off you go!"

Bender"Wait Professor, before I go, how did you-"

Farnsworth"How did I get young again?"

Bender"Yeah."

Farnsworth"I drank some tar from the Bubbling Geezer Hot Spring Spa Tar Pits and I-"

Bender not listening saying the code "A,0,?,2,0,?,3,0,1,0,6,0,8,0,?,7,0,0,?,k,0,0,5,?,0,0,2,0,0,?,4,o,0,?,0,g,0,?,0,r,0,z,0,0,0,?1,1,?,4,0,9."

There is an flash of light and Bender disappears.

Farnsworth looking down cast sad"Oh! Good bye then Bender."

Farnsworth turns to leave, to go up stairs and go to bed. But then he hesitates looking over at the couch giving him an idea.

Farnsworth"Hmm, Oh I might as well give it a try."

Farnsworth opens his lab-coat and takes out two jars. One marked

Scruffy's-Marmalade the other marked Bee- Royal -Jelly.

Farnsworth"Right, its now or never!"

Farnsworth throws the two jars at the same time, they both smash into pieces spilling its constrains all over the couch. The jelly forms both Fry and Leela shaped objects. Fry is covered allover with Bee- Royal -Jelly on the left, Leela is covered allover with Scruffy's-Marmalade she is on the right side of the couch and Farnsworth smiles and leaves to go to bed.

Leela"I don't believe it. You are alive!"

Fry"Leela? How? What? Hmm? Last thing I remember was being in excruciating pain and soiling my self."

Leela"Forget how it happened, Fry, and just make love with me, and we'll remarry after words."

Fry"Alright! I'm totally go an laid by the girl of my dreams Leela, who I love!"

Leela"You sure are."

Both Fry and kiss one another's on the cheeks at the same time."

Leela licking her lips"Mmm, your honey glazed."

Fry"And you tasted like sweet and sour marmalade."

Leela wraps her arms around Fry and pulls him close and kisses him on the lips.

Leela"Mind if I kiss,lick and suck my way down down your-"

Narrator"God Leela, kids might be seeing this! Anyway moving on."

Scene somewhere in the western country side of Ireland 1916.

There is an flash of light and Bender appears in an field of cows.

Bender"Holy cow and anchovy ! Cows and anchovies."

On the muddy ground next to Bender's feet there is a old worn wooden black bucket that coincidentally and unrealistic says on it anchovies.

Bender"This is the wrong time Fry is not even born yet, although I love stay and help the Irish win there freedom against the English with my 31thCenturt technology powers but I have noting against the everyday English parson, I just hate the Royal Family for they can, Plack Iimsa Gleigal Irainn Toi ."

Cow-One"Moo."

Cow-Two"Moo."

Bender"Shut up, and stop staring at me! I got no cow feed!"

Cow-One"Moo."

Cow-Two"Moo."

Bender"Moo Moo Moo! No wounder you cows went extinct. What do you do all day anyway?"

Cow-One"Moo."

Bender"Moo? Whats that mean? Oh I better turn on my translator."

Cow-One"We eat, sleep, and lie in are own filth and have sex all day."

The cows laugh.

Bender" Isn't that reinforce stereotype humor?"

Cow-One"Yes,why?"

Bender"Oh nothing. Anyway that sounds like my kind of life, I'd like to life and I respect you. Mind if I take a bit of your blood? So I can make clones of you, by using your DNA and become rich selling beef and cow milk and other things that come from cow?"

Cow-One"Sure,why not."

He walks over the cow,opens his chest cabinet, takes out an syringe, he then injects the syringe into the cow's skin around the abdomen he passes the syringe until its full with blood.

Bender"Pleasure doing business with you."

Bender puts the filled with cow blood syringe into his chest cabinet, he then also picks up and puts the bocked of anchovies into his chest cabinet too.

Bender"I shell never forget ye cows."

Bender saying the code"A0?20?30106080?700?k005?00200?4o0?0g0?0r0z000?11?409."

There is an flash of light and Bender disappears.

Scene Old New York. Brooklyn Pre-Med Junior Hospital labor-ward room.

Mrs. Fry shouting" Hey, keep it down! It's the 9th inning."

She holds a portable radio to her ear.

Commentator on radio" Here's the 02 pitch to Craypool. He's taking all the way for a called strike three!"

Mrs. Fry"Swing the bat, you bum!"

The doctor lifts up a baby and it cries.

Doctor" It's a boy. And look at that red hair!"

Mr. Fry"You saying my son's a commie?"

Commentator on radio" And Groady leans into the pitch!"

Mrs. Fry cheers.

Mrs. Fry"This is the happiest day of my life!"

The doctor puts the baby on her lap.

Doctor" Here's your baby, ma'am."

Mrs. Fry" Yeah, OK, thanks."

Mr. Fry" So, what should we name him?"

Bender shouting"Philip J. Fry!"

Bender bursts through the door.

Bender"Hand em over, or I'll get 24thCenturey on you ass!"

Mr. Fry"What 24thcenturey? Don't you mean-"

Bender"Oh Yeah its this time! I mean hand em over or I'll get medieval on your ass!"

Mr. Fry"No!"

Bender pulls out an one handed lightsaber out of chest cabinet, powers it on revealing that it is a red lightsaber.

Bender"I said, hand em over. or I'll get medieval on your ass!"

Mr. Fry"No"

Bender moves towards him.

Bender"Hand him over or I'm cut you into a thousand pieces, in other words in itsy bitsy pieces."

Bender now has the lightsaber a inch a way from his neck.

Mr. Fry"Okay you can have him!"

Bender turns off the lightsaber and he hands Fry over to Bender and Bender puts Fry away in his chest cabinet.

Bender"Good day to you sir."

Bender walks out through the Bender shaped like hole in the door he busted through .

Scene Brooklyn Pre-Med Junior Hospital Corridor.

Bender"Well its time to go. to the future with out using the time code. I know where the nearest cryogenic lab is and its not one your thinking of god."

Scene USA Today with headlines Alien Baby Abduction By Some Tin Man Robot With An Mumming Sound Red-Light-Stick That Can Cut Through Anything.

Narrator"Who came up with that crummy headline? Anyway Moving on."

Scene Outside Cookieville Minimum-Security Orphanarium Morris and Munda come out of a manhole near the building with their baby. They put it in a basket outside the front door. Morris puts a bracelet on the baby's wrist.

Morris" I made this bracelet so that in some small way we'll always be with you, even when it doesn't seem like it. During your entire life, for example.

He kisses her.

Munda"You won't pass for human, cutie. But if my PhD in exo-linguistics is worth diddly-poop, this note should convince them you're an alien."

She attaches the note to the baby's blanket.

Munda" And that'll be enough to give you a real life. "

She kisses the baby, puts her hood up and runs down the steps. Morris rings the doorbell and follows her. Warden Vogel opens the door and sees the baby. Morris and Munda watch from the manhole.

Morris" She'll never know we're her parents."

Munda"That's our gift to her. Better we should die than have her learn the shameful truth of her origin.

Morris" I'm with you.

They hug. Then turn and watch Vogel.

Vogel"What a beautiful gigantic eye you ha--"

The baby kicks him.

Vogel" Well, come on-"

Bender shouting"Wait you old bastard!"

An out of breath and gasping Bender runs up to Vogel and hands an screaming, Baby-Fry to him and Bender also hands him an note that explains all the details.

Vogel" Well, come on in then both of you."

Morris and Munda watching Leela and Fry disappear inside, they hold their breath and dive into the sewers.

Bender"I wounder what his life going to be like?"

Bender says the new time paradox code and a flash of light happens and he disappears.

Narrator"Bender won't know but you will lucky you."

To be continued

Buddies