Fry's Feeling Hand
By CosmicF and Rush
What if Fry was not so nervous in "A Leela of Her Own"
Scene Planet Express Lounge. Leela is kitted out in her Mets uniform and 7/8 is printed on the back. She turns around to the rest of the crew.
Leela: Ta-da! The first woman ever to play Major League Blernsball. How do I look?
Hermes: Like a sexy Yogi Berra!
Farnsworth: 'Why is your number seven-eighth's?
Leela: All the whole numbers have been retired.
Fry: Wow! I must say, I'm impressed. You look just like a ball player. Can I pat you on the butt?
Leela: Fry, I'm a professional athlete! So go ahead.
The camera pans closer to Fry as smiles blankly for a second as if to carefully think things through…
He goes for it and feels her ass, Bender eye's zoom into where Fry is feeling her ass the others gasp.
Leela angry punches Fry in the jaw knocking him over onto the ground.
Fry: (in pain rubbing his jaw) 'Owwww!
Leela: (shouting): 'Have some respect!
Fry (thinking): Hmm maybe I shouldn't… but then again…
He goes for it and feels her ass.
Bender eye's zoom into where Fry is feeling her ass, as the others gasp.
Leela (shouting): Fry!"
Fry (feeling her ass): What?
Leela: What are you doing?
Fry: Patting you on the butt.
Leela: Fry, your not patting me on the butt you're feeling it.
Fry (still feeling her ass): 'So what if am? It's so soft and round!
Leela (sexfully): I know something softer.
She kisses him on the lips.
Leela (whispering in Fry's ear): Fry meet me in the showers after the game.
Fry (whispering): What for?
Leela (whispering): Are you really that dumb?
There is a awkward silence.
Leela: For sex.
Fry (shouts in excitement): Oh baby I'm there! I'm so totally going to get lucky!
Leela (caressing Fry's chest): You sure are handsome.
Fry (thinking): Now that's something I can get on board with… still.
As Fry mulls things over the camera pans out to show Fry in a trance resting on Leela's butt.
Bender eye's zoom into where Fry is feeling her ass. The others gasp.
Fry looks away from his hand in shock.
Leela: What are you doing?
Fry: I'm patting you on the butt, you said it would be ok.
Leela's eye narrowed and Fry realised he was in trouble.
Leela: Fry, technically your not patting me on the butt. You're feeling it!
Hermes: Fry what are you doin' Mon, the planet express legal cover does not cover sexual harassment suites... even against professional athletes.
As the scene unfolds Bender puffs his cigar and steels the professors wallet.
Bender: Yeah, You disgust me meat stick.
Fry: But I...
Leela: Fry, your hand is still on my ass, now take it off before I break it off.
Fry quickly removes his hand from Leela's butt and grins sheepishly.
Fry: I'm sorry I was star struck... I felt my hand slap her ass an I was overcome.
Leela: Hmm, that's possible I guess... but something doesn't sound right.
Her eye narrows still further as she examines Fry's boyish grin.
Leela: Wait, I know that look, you were fantasising about me again weren't you?
Fry: Uh no...
Fry blushes and looks embarrassed.
Leela and the rest all continue to stare accusingly at Fry until the colour of his face turned a deep red.
Fry: Well maybe, I just kind of tuned out, I didn't mean to!
Hermes: That just maybe Fry, but you chose the worst possible time to drift into your fantasy world. I'll see you in my office in 5 Minutes.
Hermes turns to Leela and searches his pockets.
Hermes: Leela on behalf of planet express, I would like to offer you our sincerest apologies and say that fry actions where his own and do not in any way reflect the company ethos regarding our female employees.... not even Amy.
Hermes motions over to Amy whose only response is to simply continue staring vacantly at Fry.
Hermes: By means of an apology we would like to offer you 2 tickets the luxury Zorn spa in Paris...
Leela: Really, thanks.
Hermes: Just sign these forms waving your right to sew the company.
Leela signs the papers and takes the tickets. Hermes turns to Fry.
Hermes: Damn it Mon, those promotional tickets were my anniversary gift to Le-Barbra. Fry get to my office now.
Hermes and Fry both head to his office. the door slams behind them and the chewing out in progress sign activates.
Later that night Fry finally emerges from Hermes office to find Leela back in her normal clothes waiting for him in the employee lounge.
Leela: Hey Fry.
Fry: Oh hey I'm sorry about the whole caressing your ass thing. I really don't know what came over me. I hope you realise I think your more than just a hot female co-worker, or eye candy. Please forgive me; you know I'd never intentionally do anything to ruin our friendship right?
Leela: I know Fry, I'm sure if you meant to grope me you would have tried to do more than rest the palm of your hand on my right buttock, besides you've been spacing out a lot lately.
Fry smiles sheepishly.
Fry: Thanks Leela, Is there anything I can do to make it up to you?
Leela smiles coyly.
Leela: Well if you find time between those employee instructional videos you'll have to watch, you could always take me to the spa i guess.
Fry's eyes widen in surprise.
Leela: OK, cool you Jets hotshot. I just need someone to go with, and I'm not going to the spa with Amy again. not after all the blocked pores and boot rash talk i got from her the last time. It's not a date!
Fry: That's OK, I could use some R&R and i couldn't think of anyone I'd rather spend it with.
Leela: Good. but remember, it definitely not a date OK.
Fry: Yeah OK, after all with that restraining order Hermes is having slapped on me, I wont be able to get within 10 feet of you anyway.
Leela: Perfect! So what do you say, tomorrow at eight?
Fry: It's a date!
Leela: It's not a date! Oh and clean yourself up first. I'm not showing up to a spa with someone who looks like they actually need a bath.
Fry: Fine, though if I'm 10 ft away from you the whole time I don't think your in any danger of anyone thinking your with me...
Leela (smiling): Like I said perfect.