The ButterFry Effect
(Scene opens on a shot of Hermes, Zoidberg, Leela, Fry, and Amy around the conference table, Hermes speaking)
Hermes: Now, the Professor is tired of always forgetting things and makin' mistakes while running deese meetins, so he's on a new medication. I want ya all to be supportive.
Crew (simultaneous): Fine/OK/Gotcha
(Farnsworth enters, he pours a pill into his mouth from a bottle that reads "Donald Trump's Head's X-Tra Strength Boss Pills (Warning: Do not take if senile )"
(The following scene takes place at increasingly rapid speed)
Farnsworth (sitting down): All right, let's get down to business. Hermes, hand me the forms for today's delivery!
Hermes: But dere are no deliveries today, remember? That's why we're havin' this meetin!
Farnsworth: Insolence! Impudence! You're fired! Get out!
(Hermes backs away, shocked, and leaves the room)
Farnsworth: Zoidberg! Assume his duties!
Zoidberg: Yes, sir! (He takes Hermes's clipboard)
Farnsworth: Fry! Tell me the condition of the ship's engines!
Fry: uh...they exist?
Farnsworth: Not good enough! Get out, you're fired!
(Fry resentfully leaves the room)
Farnsworth: Zoidberg! Assume his duties!
Zoidberg: Uh...yes, sir! (Slouches into Fry's chair with Hermes's clipboard)
Amy (leery): Maybe you should let us have a look at those pills...
(Leela and Amy get up and advance on the Professor)
Leela: Honestly Professor, Amy and I are the ones that would know about the ship...
Farnsworth: Nonsense! Woman can't be trusted with machinery. My ship's not a blow dryer you know!
(Leela and Amy slap Farnsworth at the same time, malforming his face)
Farnsworth (muffled): Fired! Both of you! Zoidberg, assume their duties! And check those engines!
Zoidberg: Oh... (Takes Hermes's clipboard and drags Fry's chair towards the ship. The women leave the room, and Farnsworth is now alone at the table. He blinks sharply.)
(He looks around, confused, then takes another pill)
Farnsworth (abnormally booming voice): Everyone get in here, we're wasting valuable meeting time!
(Hermes, Leela, Amy, Zoidberg, and Fry grudgingly enter, followed by Scruffy)
Farnsworth (to Scruffy): Who the hell are you?
Scruffy: I'm Scruffy, the j-
Farnsworth: You don't work here! Get out! You're fired! ...Zoidberg, assume his duties!
(Scruffy willingly hands Zoidberg his broom, and leaves)
Zoidberg (bleating): Oohhh...
Leela: Professor, this is ridiculous... we're trying to be supportive, but-
Farnsworth: That's it! Everyone's fired! That's right! Get out!
(Everyone starts to exit again)
Farnsworth: Zoidberg, assume their duties!
Zoidberg (baffled): But I... I can't...I was... they...
Farnsworth: I'm tired of your whining! You're fired! Get out!
(Zoidberg dejectedly starts to leave)
Farnsworth: Zoidberg! Assume his duties!
Zoidberg (demented): AHHHHHHHHH! (Falls to the ground in the fetal position)
(The rest of the crew stops and looks on as the Professor pops another pill)
Fry: The stuff works pretty well...
(Cut to Opening Credits and Music)
Brought To You By The Number 6, And Leprosy
(Scene opens on Fry and Leela looking nervously into the door that leads to the Professor's lab. Farnsworth can be heard talking to himself)
Farnsworth (off screen): Now...to be especially careful when splitting the chronotrons...
Leela (whispering): I don't like this one bit. Every experiment with chronotrons has ended in horrible disaster.
Fry (whispering): Well... maybe he's due?
(Sound of a jack-hammer is heard, followed by a sudden explosion. Leela and Fry hit the deck as a volley of beakers and syringes whizzes overhead. Smoke permeates in from the lab)
Farnsworth (OS, still calm): Almost...got it...
(More pounding is heard)
Fry: I guess not... I wonder what space-time thingy he's going to mess up this time.
(Time distorts and Leela and Fry find themselves standing up again. An explosion is heard, and the same barrage of glassware as before flies at them. Leela gets down but Fry is clipped and knocked off camera)
Farnsworth (OS, shouting): Sorry, everyone on Earth!
(Cut to the conference table. Leela is applying a Band-Aid to Fry's forehead. Amy enters with an envelope)
Amy: Hey guys, look what we're invited to!
(She pulls out an invitation. The cover says "You're Invited" and features a picture of Zapp Brannigan posing with arms akimbo)
Leela (hopeful): An execution?
Amy: No... (She opens the invitation and reads it) Congratulations, you have been invited to Lieutenant Kif Kroker's... blank... birthday party.
Amy: Hmm. Chances are Zapp has no clue how old Kif is. It's the thought that counts though, right? (continues reading) Due to DOOP regulations, the party cannot be held on the Nimbus, a battle cruiser. Instead, it will be held on Zapp Brannigan's new leisure vessel, The Zoftig. Ship leaves Earth port tomorrow at 5:00PM.
Leela: The Zoftig?
Fry: Sounds classy!
Leela (sarcastic): Oh yeah...real classy.
(She points to some fine print on the invitation. It reads: "BYOB: (The second B is for Boobies.)")
Leela: The jerk's probably just throwing this party to steal all the attention for himself and his new ship. (sigh) I guess you really want me to go, huh.
Amy (To Leela): Well, it would make Kif happier. The invitation is for me, you, and a third guest. I guess that's you, Fry.
Leela (defensive): Hey, I may have a date lined up!
(Amy looks at her smugly)
Fry: Hey, speaking of people other than me, where are Hermes, Bender, and Zoidberg?
Leela: Fry, Zoidberg's right over there. (She points a few feet away. Zoidberg has not moved since we last saw him)
Zoidberg (meekly muttering): no...I'll take those croutons, sir...
Amy: Someone should do something about that.
(Scruffy enters, broom in hand)
Scruffy: (doffs his cap) Sorry I'm late, schedule issues. (He starts pushing at Zoidberg with the head of the broom)
Leela: Anyway, Hermes is out looking for another doctor who will look at Zoidberg... without being nauseated. And Bender? I have no clue. You'd know better than me.
(On cue, Bender enters)
Fry: Bender, where have you been?
Bender: Out having the time of my life, buddy. I just stopped in to steal your wallet and then I have a date with destiny... bot 450TRX.
Fry: Aww...there's nothing like young robot love to... (realization) Hey! My wallet's gone!
Bender: So long, losers! (exits)
Leela: This coming from a robot who has to steal from Fry to support himself.
Bender (reentering): Ooh. What biting wit. And by that, I mean it bites! (exits, then reenters) ...and that you should bite me. (exits, then reenters) On my ass!
(He laughs while exiting for good. Scruffy momentarily looks up, then gets back to slowly sweeping Zoidberg across the floor)
Farnsworth (OS, shouting triumphantly): I've done it!
Amy: Remember to flush this time!
Farnsworth: No... My new invention! It works!
Leela: How do you know?
Farnsworth: Because, back in my lab, I just appeared out of nowhere, told myself that it worked, and then eventually disappeared.
(He produces a compact device with a button and a small readout, about the size of an electric razor)
Farnsworth: This is the Preventatron. I was tired of always forgetting things, and then making the wrong decisions, then remembering what I was supposed to do when it was too late. With the Preventatron, I won't have the problem anymore...that is, unless I forget to use it.
Leela: How does it work?
Farnsworth: Simple, I just hit this button here, and the Preventatron vaults me back 5 minutes in time! I appear in the same spot I used the device, only five minutes earlier!
(Background: Scruffy jabs Zoidberg a bit too hard with the broom. Zoidberg perks up, and in a deranged delirium lunges at Scruffy; they fall off camera)
Amy: So then there are two of you at the same time?
Farnsworth: For that five minute overlap, yes there is. However, our friend Mr. Space-time will only be folded for just that long.
(Background: Zoidberg stands up, then elbow drops off camera, trilling loudly)
Farnsworth (pointing to the display on the device): When this five minute timer here hits zero, one of two things can happen. Assuming the "you" that goes back has no effect on the timeline of the "past you", then at zero your "past self" will use the Preventatron just as you did. They will disappear, and only you will remain.
Leela: ...but I thought the purpose was to interact with yourself.
(Background: Scruffy pops up, trying to open a can of spinach; Zoidberg tackles him and they fall off camera)
Farnsworth: So it is! If you do interact with your past self, or alter their timeline, you therefore thwart them from using the Preventatron just as you did. Thus, it's clearly evident that you did not, in fact, go back in time in the first place!
Amy: You're losing me.
Fry: (blank stare, drool oozes from the corner of his mouth)
Farnsworth: Case in point, if this timer hits zero, and the "past you" does not go back in time, the "later you" disappears, never having been there in the first place! What's interesting, though, is that even though you were never there, you can still affect your surroundings before you disappear. Quite a paradox, and it's why this device works perfectly!
Fry: All this science talk makes my head hurt...(He grabs the back of his head) or maybe it's this... (he removes a small syringe left over from the blast)
(Background: Scruffy has Zoidberg over his shoulder, comatose. He starts to exit the room)
Scruffy: Scruffy's getting overtime for this. (He leaves)
Farnsworth: Thanks a lot Zoidberg! That's coming out of your pay, you shellfish bastard! (Shakes his fist)
Fry: So...uh...can we use it?
Farnsworth (Still shaking): Use what?
Fry: That thing! (He points to the Preventatron)
Farnsworth: Huh? (He stares blankly at it for a second) Sure, what do I care? I don't need to shave. (He hands it to Fry) Now, to work on my greatest creation yet, the Preventatron! (He exits)
Amy (watching Farnsworth leave): Wow.
Leela (cynical): Amazing. A genius one second, a senile old man using stool softener the next.
Fry: I still don't think that stuff is necessary (He sits on a nearby stool, which gives way under his weight until he's on the floor) ...though that was fun.
Leela: Speaking of which, don't go wreaking havoc with the Preventatron. It frightens me thinking of what's possible with that thing. I don't want you randomly appearing in my shower or something.
(Fry briefly considers the possibilities)
Leela (regretful): Oh... I should never have said that.
(Suddenly, she lunges for the Preventatron, but Fry dodges)
Fry (playfully evading): I just wanna try it out, maybe talk to myself for a bit, play some cards... I'm not going to do anything wrong!
Amy (To Leela): Spluh'mon Leela, Fry's not that immature, is he? (To Fry): He better act mature at Kif's party tomorrow. As far as I can tell, it's going to be very elegant.
(Cut to the next day: Fry, Leela and Amy walking from a tube terminal. They are in formal wear, and Amy is carrying a gift)
Leela: So Fry, did you have fun playing with yourself last night?
(Fry freezes up and looks guiltily shocked)
Fry (realizing): OH! You meant this thing! (Pulls out the Preventatron) No, I didn't use it.
Fry: Well, I started thinking about what it would be like to "fade away". Creeped me out.
Leela: Wait. So you did understand what the Professor was talking about?
Fry: A little. That fading away thing stuck with me though; I don't know why...
(The three round a corner, and the Zoftig comes into view. It is indeed an impressive vessel. Zapp and Kif are welcoming guests aboard. Amy runs ahead and kisses Kif.)
Amy: Happy birthday Kif!
Kif (blushing): Thank you Amy. I'm glad you all could come...
Leela: Hi Kif. Happy-
Zapp: (stepping between them) Well, well, Leela. This is quite an erotic surprise. Titillating, even. Or maybe it's an erogenous surprise...
Kif (to Amy and Fry): (sigh) ...he found my thesaurus yesterday.
Leela (quickly angered): Zapp, you invited us.
Zapp (ignoring that): My darling Leela, when will you realize exactly how much love I have for you?
Leela (sardonic): Oh? Exactly how much love is that, Zapp?
Zapp (taken off guard): Uh... eighteen?
Leela: Eighteen what?
Zapp (improvising): Um... eighteen... love... hertz?
Leela (not amused): Very clever Zapp...
Zapp (Finally noticing Fry): Oh, what's he doing here?
Amy (stanch): The invitation was for three people, Zapp.
Zapp (patronizing): I meant three females. Geez! I mean, I thought the boobies thing would have been enough to- oof!
Leela: (pushing through him) We'll see you inside Kif.
Fry: Happy Birthday, man! (He attempts a high five but Kif is too befuddled by Amy's exit to react in time)
(Cut to: the Zoftig's entranceway. The place is decorated fancily, and a hall leads to a dining area already abuzz with an assortment of humans and amphibions. Someone taps Amy on the shoulder; she turns around, causing Fry and Leela stop as well)
Kif: Amy, I just want to apologize for this party before it starts... you three are the only real friends of mine Zapp invited! The rest seem to be random women, old friends of his, and people I assume he haphazardly selected from my planet! Most don't even know me... and I think some of Zapp's old high-school buddies spiked the punch.
(Cut to a shattered punch bowl on the ground. A caterer attempts to bring out another one)
Man: Look, another!
Man 2: Get it!
(One of them snatches the bowl, and promptly flings it to the ground. They high five)
Amy (aghast): mutters in Cantonese
Leela (reassuring): ...well, it's OK Kif. Fry will fit in just fine, and I'll try to make the best of it. I'm sure you and Amy will still have a wonderful dinner together...
(Cut to later: Zapp, Kif, Amy, Leela, 2 unknown amphibions, and an attractive human female around a table)
Zapp (already laughing): And so I say to the waiter, "Bon appetite? I'd like to bone a petite... woman!" Ahahahaha! (he slaps his thigh)
Kif: (hands over face) Oh...
(Clearly bored, Amy gets up from her seat and whispers coyly into Kif's ear)
Kif: Oh... well...I...uh...(sputter)...excuse us...f- for a minute please.
(The two scamper off together. Leela looks on, and then glances to the empty seat next to her. Fry's jacket is draped over the back; she sighs)
Zapp: So Leela... enjoying yourself?
Leela (oozing sarcasm): Ohh... it's all wonderful! It reeeally Engelberts my Humperdinck. We should do this more often.
Zapp: You'd be having a better time if you didn't hate everything about me, you know. (he winks)
Leela (breaking point): Listen here you self-centered- (Her eye diverts)...what the...
(All eyes at the table slowly turn to observe a small ship in view just outside the port window)
Woman: What is that thing?
Leela: It looks almost like a small frigate.
Woman (confused): A frigate?
Amphibion (surprised): A frigate?!
Leela (affirmative): A frigate.
Zapp (clearly worried) Oh, frig it...
(The frigate docks with the Zoftig. The dining room falls silent, and after a brief delay, footsteps can be heard approaching. Soon the hall is rushed with aliens. These beings are of average height, blue, and have scaly skin much like the Omicronians. However, their bodies are about half the width. All are armed heavily, forcing all of the partygoers to freeze)
Invader 1 (harsh): Party's over!
Man 1 (dejected): Oh... (he takes off his party hat)
(A pompous looking invader strides confidently up to Zapp, who is now standing)
Leader: So, Captain Brannigan, we meet again.
Zapp (snide): Hello... Flarx.
Flarx: It took some effort, but I have finally caught you where you are most vulnerable. Don't think I've forgotten the mockery DOOP has made of the Grivakk. Your battalion was responsible for our failed invasion. You are to blame for our failure, and you will be punished severely! (to his subordinates) Let the civilians go, he's the only one we want.
(Guns pointed at civilians lower; some stay frozen while others dart for the escape pods)
Leela (whispering): Zapp, I recommend doing something for once, or you're dead.
Zapp: Are you kidding? Grivakks are evil! And not just, "planet has natural resources" evil, mind you. These are legitimate enemies. Hell, I don't even know how-
Flarx (menacing): Silence! You shall be tortured beyond pain itself, and I will thoroughly enjoy every minute of it. I've even rented one of those little popcorn making carts for the event.
Zapp (delighted): Ooh! Can I have some?
Flarx: Your torture shall not include popcorn!
Zapp: Oh. (to himself): Kif, where are you, you little green coward?
(Cut to escape pod number four. As the pod door opens some of the party goers recklessly dive in, landing square on Kif and Amy, who are using the pod as a make-out chamber. Amy tirades in Cantonese, but the door slams shut, blocking her voice from audibility. The capsule jettisons)
Flarx: So, Captain Brannigan. How is this going to happen? The easy way (gestures towards the hall that leads to the docking bay), or the hard way.. (cocks his pistol, and aims at Zapp's kneecaps)
Zapp (panicky): Uh... define "is"
Flarx: That is irrelevant!
Zapp: Define "irrelevant"
Flarx: You should know what that is!
Zapp: Define "is"
Flarx (vicious): Take him away!
Zapp (Shatner-drama): Do what you must to me! Just don't hurt my chestacular love-dove Leela!
Leela: Zapp, normally you should be in front of me while saying that...
(Camera zooms out to show Zapp is now using Leela as a human shield, cowering away from Flarx's gun)
Leela (suddenly aware she's been jeopardized): But I should be going now...
Flarx (shrewd): So...Captain, you are attached to the one-eyed woman before you...(evil chuckle) Take them both...
Leela: No! (she is seized)
(The Grivakks exit the room; two of the last ones dragging Zapp and Leela out of the dining room and down the hall)
Flarx: You will watch her die first, Captain Brannigan.
Zapp: (sigh)...Then can I have popcorn?
Zapp (Shatner): You... monsters!
(Further down the hall, Fry casually and obliviously exits the men's room just in time to see Leela being dragged off by the Grivakks. She catches sight of him)
Leela (frantic): Fry, do something! They're going to kill us- (she disappears around the corner)
(The last Grivakk stares Fry down with his gun, then exits the hall)
Fry: Oh my God!
(He follows the hallway to where the last Grivakk exited, rounding the corner to find an empty docking bay. The airlock door shuts, and the sound of the frigate disengaging echoes through the chamber. With a jolt, Fry exits the room and doubles back towards the bathroom. Once inside, he pulls out the Preventatron from his pants pocket. He looks at it for a second)
Fry: I really didn't want to have to need to do this...(He sighs, then hits the button)
7:30 ... 7:29 ... 7:28 ... 7:27 ... 7:26 ... 7:25
(Fry #2 materializes in an otherwise empty bathroom. He checks the Preventatron display. It reads 4:56, and is counting down)
Fry #2: Ok, I should be here any second. I just need to tell myself to get Leela to safety before something bad happens... I guess.
(Cut to: Fry #1 lazily strolling towards the bathroom, he blearily enters, and sees himself across the room)
Fry #1 (startled): Holy crap!
(Camera pans, Fry is looking into the bathroom mirror)
Fry #1: Oh.
(He turns to see Fry #2 standing right next to him)
Fry #1 (startled): Holy crap! (pause) What up?
Fry #2 (serious): You've got to do something, right now! Something very bad is going to happen in four minutes! You need to get Leela away from whoever those blue aliens are that about to get on this ship!
Fry #1: Uh...Ok. (realizing) So wait, you used the Preventatron?! But... but... that means you...
Fry #2 (resigned): Well, I think Leela would do the same for us. And besides, the consequences are my problem, not yours, right?
Fry #1 (confused): I'm not following you...
Fry #2: No, I'm not following you.
Fry #1: Huh?
(Fry #2 throws him out of the door)
Fry #2: Hurry up!
Fry #1: Wait, why aren't you coming with me?
Fry #2 (frustrated): Think about it. Two Frys will need more explaining than necessary, and that takes time. Now go; let me fade into oblivion in peace...
Fry #1 (uneasy): OK... (he heads down the hallway)
(Fry #2 calmly sits down against the wall on the tile floor, locking his arms around his knees)
Fry #2 (softly): She'd come back for me...
(Cut to: Fry #1 jogging down the hallway. He enters the dining room just in time to see Kif and Amy scurry off. He pauses briefly, then makes his way to the table)
Zapp: So Leela...
Fry #1 (interjecting): Leela!
Leela: Fry, what's the matter?
Fry #1: Leela, we have to leave, now!
Leela (staring at him): What are you talking about?
Fry #1: Ok, so I was in the bathroom, and-
Zapp: So, clogging my velour padded toilets then running away like a sissy! How typical of you...
Fry #1: No! Listen! They're going to take you away Leela, you have to believe me!
Leela: Who is?
Zapp(loud): What was that? Did we hit another tour bus?
(There is general clamor in the dining hall)
(Fry #1 pulls out the Preventatron, and shows it to Leela as footsteps approach)
Fry #1: This is how I know. I heard it from my own mouth, who I trust even more than a horse! You can't stay here.
Leela: But you -
(The Grivakks enter)
Grivakk: Party's over!
Man 1: Oh...
Flarx: So, Captain Brannigan, we meet again.
Zapp (snide): Hello...Flarx.
Flarx: It took some effort, but I have finally caught you where you are most vulnerable...
Fry #1: (whispering to Leela): These people are going to take you away. I came back to rescue you.
(Leela looks at Flarx, then looks back to Fry)
Leela (whispering): O...k... But how?
Flarx: ...he's the only one we want.
Fry #1: Works for me!
(Fry #1 grabs Leela's hand and drags her towards the escape pods. However, Zapp grabs her other hand)
Zapp: Leela, don't leave me now! I beg you to kiss me goodbye before I am sent to my doom by these Grivakks!
Leela: Are you just going to accept your fate without a fight?
Zapp: Does that increase or decrease my odds of a kiss?
Fry #1: (Trying to pull Leela away from Zapp in vain): We don't have time for this...
Flarx (amused): So, Captain Brannigan, you wish to win the heart of this reluctant Cyclops?
Zapp: The rest of her was easy; the heart is the hard part.
(Leela breaks free of Zapp's grip, and slaps him while Fry drags her in the other direction)
Flarx: Hold it! (gun drawn, Fry and Leela freeze) You are quite a special case, my dear. With you I could raze Brannigan's spirit before I mutilate his carcass!
Fry #1: Why would you want to raise his spirit?
Leela: Fry...he... Oh, it's not important. The important thing is- Hee-ya!
(Leela kicks the gun from Flarx's hand and she and Fry make a break for it. They get about 10 feet before they are surrounded)
Flarx: Take Brannigan and the Cyclops, leave the other. Zapp seems to know him well, but I only have two torture tables on board anyway.
Grivakk: We could have brought three if you didn't insist on that popcorn cart!
Zapp (thrilled): Popcorn?
Flarx: Silence! Let's go.
(Leela and Zapp are dragged out of the room, Fry #1 watching helplessly)
Leela (upset): Fry, I'm sorry. I should have listened sooner! (She is carried out)
(Fry #1 stares on, motionless with the remaining guests, sheer horror on his face)
(Cut to: The docking bay: Most Grivakks have passed through the airlock, and only Flarx, the two dragging Zapp and Leela, and a fourth remain)
Grivakk: Hey, can we shoot the ship to pieces after we leave?
(Flarx pauses to contemplate)
Flarx: Well... there are still people on board... (he laughs)... Ok.
Zapp: No fair!
Voice off screen: Leela!
(Fry #1 hurriedly rounds the corner while simultaneously flinging the Preventatron towards Leela and her captors. The Grivakks, startled, turn to point their weapons at Fry, giving Leela the leeway she needs to squirm away. She catches the device as the laser beams fly)
7:30 ... 7:29 ... 7:28 ... 7:27 ... 7:26 ... 7:25
Leela #2 (as she appears): Fry, no!
(She pauses briefly, trying to gain her bearing. She looks at her hand, still gripping the Preventatron tightly, her finger is on the button)
Leela #2 (to herself): I... went back... I can stop that from happening! (thinking) Ok, the bathroom... he was in the bathroom...
(She exits the docking bay and heads down the hall)
(Cut to: Leela arriving at the bathroom, just as Fry #1 is heaved out of the door)
Fry #2: Hurry up!
Fry #1 (Noticing Leela): Leela! What are you doing here? Well, it doesn't matter, now we can get you away from whoever's trying to get you, and things will be OK!
Leela #2: It's much worse than just that Fry; they're going to destroy the whole ship after they take Zapp and me away. (She pushes Fry #1 back into the bathroom and enters herself)
Fry #1: You seem less confused about this than you should be... but that means...
(Fry #2 perks up)
Fry #2: You came back for us!
Leela #2: Everyone on this ship is in danger. We don't have time to evacuate. Fry...uh, Frys, it looks like we need to stop that ship entirely, not just get me off of it.
Fry #1: How are we going to do that?
Leela #2: I don't know... (thinking it through) Well, there's a chance... if we could find some sort of explosive onboard... then we could ambush them at the airlock. Sever the tie with the ships connected. Their ship is so small it wouldn't survive... but luxury cruisers like this one have safety features which will seal off the docking bay in the case of a breach...
Fry #2: Do you think Zapp has anything like that on board?
Leela #2: Zapp's the man that cut a ribbon with a death laser. I'd guess he has explosives onboard in place of mop in his supply closet...
Fry #1: OK, I'll try to get the other you away from whoever's about to capture you, or at least stall them, and you two try to find something explosive.
Leela #2: But you didn't keep me away from them. You were too confusing, and I was too stubborn.
Fry #2 (hyper): OK then, we'll switch places! I'll go after the early Leela, and you two find the explosives.
Leela #2: Well, it couldn't hurt.
Fry #1: This isn't fair, both of you have gone back and know stuff about things! I'm getting so confused!
Leela #2: That's them...
(The three exit the bathroom)
Fry #2 (backing away): Just stop thinking about it. Remember what I told you about thinking? Good luck...
(He turns and sprints down the hallway, checking the counter on his Preventatron)
Leela #2 (shouting) Don't let Zapp grab my arm!
(Fry #1 and Leela #2 quickly head the other way)
Fry #1: This is all really weird. Do you think this plan might work?
Leela #2: I don't even know, this is confusing and we don't have enough time... I'm beside myself.
Fry #1: You think you're beside yourself!
Leela #2 (exasperated yet amused): Fry...
(Fry #1 and Leela #2 dash down the hallway and around a corner, reaching a supply closet. Leela pushes a button on an electronic entry pad, and the door springs open. The two dart inside; the door closes behind them)
Fry #1: Well, it was unlocked, so what are the odds that-
Leela #2: Jackpot! ...finally some luck.
(She points over Fry's shoulder to a box on a shelf. Fry turns to face it and reads an attached label)
Fry #1 (reading): "Timed mine with fifteen second delay. Useful for destroying balls, or unclogging toilet, but not both."
Leela: #2 That irresponsible idiot...(she glances at her Preventatron) Wait... assuming the other Fry alters my timeline, that means I'm going to disappear in one minute!
Fry #1: And I hate to break it to you, but we don't have time to get back there and set this up...
Leela #2: You're right, and even if we did, the Grivakks could be leaving by now...
Fry #1: Yeah, who knows? You can't hear anything through these walls. (He raps on the thick metal door)
Leela #2: (thinking) Unless, we were to get there before they do...
Fry #1: You mean...
Leela #2: We'll just go back again! We can ambush them as they get there!
Fry #1 (whining): But I don't want to go back...
Leela #2: C'mon, you know you did it before!
Fry #1: (sigh) Fine... you first.
(Leela hits the button on her Preventatron, but nothing happens)
Leela #2 (frantic): It doesn't work! The thing won't activate for me twice within the same five minutes!
Fry #1: That's easy to get around, just take mine... (He shows her his version of the Preventatron)
Leela #2 (agitated): Fry, that's... (reconsiders)... weird enough to work.
(The two swap Preventatrons)
Leela #2: Ok, together... one, two, three!
7:30 ... 7:29 ... 7:28 ... 7:27 ... 7:26 ... 7:25
(Fry #3 and Leela #3 appear in the supply closet. They check their Preventatron displays. Both read 4:57)
Leela #3: Did we just... cheat space-time?
Fry #3: Yeah! Take that pseudo-science!
Leela #3: OK, let's get going... we still don't have much time.
(The two exit the closet, and cautiously head down the hallway)
(Cut to: The men's room door)
Leela #2: It's much worse than just that Fry; they're going to destroy the whole ship after they take Zapp and me away. (Leela #2, Fry #2, and Fry #1 enter the bathroom)
(Fry #3 and Leela #3 scamper down the hallway and past the very same door, Fry with box in hand. They arrive at the docking bay undetected)
(Cut to: Leela #3 mounting a mine on the airlock. Fry #3 is pacing nervously, looking at his Preventatron)
Fry #3: Leela, we're running out of time... they're going to be here any second.
Leela #3 (worried): This is taking longer that I thought... this bomb isn't battle-ready.
Fry #3: Meaning?
Leela #3: Some assembly required...
Fry #3: Well, it better be ready soon, because it looks like they're ready. (He points out the porthole; the Grivakk frigate can be seen approaching)
Leela #3: (snapping a control onto the front of the mine she has placed) Fry, you hold the wheel on that airlock hatch as long as you can. Try to keep it locked.
Fry #3: Aye-aye, captain! (he looks out the window) Here they come...
(He braces himself and grasps the metal wheel with both hands)
Leela #3 (pushing some buttons): I just need a minute...
Fry #3: We don't have that!
(Grivakks grab the door on the other side. Fry holds tight)
Leela #3 (nearly stabbing at the buttons with her fingers): C'mon, c'mon!
(Banging can be heard on the door. Fry is sweating. He loses his grip and the wheel starts to spin, he grabs at it and snags a hold after half a turn)
Fry #3 (livid) : Damnit!
(This shout echoes through the docking bay, and catches the ear of a familiar face passing the bay entrance in the hallway. It is Fry #2, en route to Leela #1 and Zapp)
Fry #2: (rushing to the airlock): What's going on?!
Fry #3: Help me hold this door shut while Leela sets the bomb!
(Fry #2 grabs a hold of the wheel and the tug of war evens out a little)
Leela #3: Almost...there...
Fry #3: (still losing grip): Hurry!
Leela #3 (hitting button): Got it! (waving them on) Go! Go!
(Leela turns to run, as do the two Frys, but with no one holding the door, the wheel twirls and the door flings open. Grivakks rush the floor, the first two lunging to grab Leela and Fry #3)
Grivakk 1: (Holding Leela, oblivious to the nearby explosive) How dare you try to thwart our abduction! You'll be punished along with- oof!
(He is blindsided by Fry #2 who wrestles him to the ground. Leela #3 ducks free and turns to find both Frys incapacitated by the onrushing Grivakks)
Fry #3: JUST GO! You can go back! You can change this!
(Leela #3 turns, glances back for a split second, then makes her decision to sprint towards the door. Finally, a Grivakk notices what's going on)
Grivakk 2: (pointing hysterically) Some one set us up the bomb!
(The two Frys catch each other's eye)
Fry #2 (reflective): Beats fading away...
(A small explosion rips the airlock apart as Leela #3 dives gracelessly through the docking bay door, sliding to a stop on the hardwood floor. Before she can recover, the pressure change starts to drag her back towards the airlock. Leela loses her grip on her Preventatron as they both recoil towards the void. Suddenly, the door closes as an emergency barricade deploys, plugging the portal. Leela's momentum carries her careening into this barricade, followed by the Preventatron, which breaks into several pieces on impact. They land in a slightly neater heap than Leela does)
(Leela struggles awkwardly to her feet, a bit woozy. She reels to face the barricade)
Leela #3 (to herself): Fry...
Barricade computer (loud): Attention. Emergency barricade deployed. Breach in the docking bay airlock. Hall pressure stabilized. Attention.
(Leela franticly searches the ground, discovering a ruined device and nothing more. She picks it up and stares at it)
Leela #3 (weakly) : I can't go back... no one can go back...
(Tears begin to well in her eye. She spikes the Preventatron to the ground)
Leela #3 (lashing out): Damnit Fry! Why did you have to go and...
(She freezes up. A glimmer of realization shines through her wet eye)
Leela #3 (hopeful): But, there still should be... (her face changes back to horror) ...unless... oh God...
(Leela #3 breaks into a full sprint down the hallway, determination overshadowing her disheveled appearance. She races just out of sight of the party goers, who start to enter the hallway but are distracted by the barricade)
(Cut to: the supply room, where Leela #2 and Fry #1 stand poised)
Leela #2: Ok, together... one, two-
(The door shoots open)
Leela #3: Stop!
(Fry #1 turns just in time to be tackled to the ground)
Leela #3: Don't hit that button!
(She knocks the Preventatron out of Fry's hand)
Leela #3 (crying): Why do I have to keep watching you die?!
Fry #1: What?
Leela #3: (sobbing into his shoulder; now transparent): I almost lost you... You didn't have to Fry... you didn't have to...
(Leela #3 fades away, clinging to Fry. As Leela #2 stares on, speechless, The Preventatron on the floor hits zero. That Preventatron and Leela #2 turn transparent and gradually fade away, the device in Leela's hand falling to the ground)
(A very confused Fry gets up and dusts himself off, trying to figure it all out. He glances at the dropped device that Leela #2 once held, and decides to pick it up before leaving the supply closet)
Fry #1 (suddenly worried): If two Leela's faded away... are there any left? (forcing optimism) There has to be...
(Regardless, he quickens his pace down the hall, eventually arriving at a mob of perplexed dinner guests at what used to be the docking bay. He notices Leela #1, mistily gazing at the emergency barricade)
Fry #1 (relieved): Leela!
Leela #1 (distraught): Fry! There you are! We heard the barricade but didn't know what had happened... and then you weren't in the bathroom, so I thought... I thought...
Fry (calming her): It's Ok Leela, I was down the hall by the... (realizing) You...you really were worried about me?
Leela (still shaken): Well yeah Fry, it's not like I don't care about you...
(Fry turns to the emergency barricade, and a slight comprehension shows in his eyes. He puts his arm on Leela's shoulder and leads her away from the commotion surrounding the area)
Fry: I know, Leela... I know...